3 Steps to Overcoming

Your Villains

Ep. 162 with Lesley & Brad

“Self-doubt is actually part of the growth process.”

Brad Crowell

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Show Notes

What or who are the villains in your life keeping you from the things that are meant for you? This episode holds everything from overcoming those villains, changing nervousness to confidence, and the best tips for road trips.

If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected]. Or leave a comment below!

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

  • How to survive a long road trip
  • Take a bet on yourself
  • How to connect past dots to move forward
  • The ebbs and flows of confidence is normal
  • The ultimate way you achieve confidence
  • How to change nervousness to confidence
  • Three steps to overcoming your villains

Episode References/Links:

Transcript

Lesley Logan
Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I’m Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I’ve trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it’s the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It’s a practice, not a perfect. Let’s get started.

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Lesley Logan
Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co hosts in life, Brad and I want to dig into the influential convo I had with Heather Monahan in our last episode. If you haven’t yet listened to the interview, feel free to pause this now, go back and listen to that one and then come back and join us. Honestly, you should listen to her. (Brad: Yeah) She is written two books. She has been talking this talk and walking this walk for a long time. And if anyone’s been be it till she sees it, she’s one of those examples and if you’ve been listening to pod for a long time, you will remember many moons ago I said, I want to have Heather Monahan on this show. Boom, I have Heather Monahan on this show. (Brad: Love it.) I’m so proud of that.

Brad Crowell
Yeah. I do remember she was on the wish list.

Lesley Logan
She was on the wish list.

Brad Crowell
Because of a quote that she said.

Lesley Logan
Yes. She said, “Don’t take a no from anyone who … isn’t able to give you a yes.”

Brad Crowell
Yeah. And I remember we had a whole conversation about that. You were really excited when you heard that.

Lesley Logan
Yeah. So that hey, y’all what that means is, if someone’s assistant tells you, no, they’re telling you no, because I have an assistant most people know, because the person said, “I don’t want to do any of these things.” But that doesn’t mean they don’t want to ever do any of those things. They just want to make sure that like most of them don’t get through. But if you find the third door, another person I want to have on the show, someone can put that person down the wish list. There’s a third door and that’s how you get the yes from an actual person and give you the yes, boom. Anyways, hello from Texas. We are on the road this week, officially. And we are if you’re listening this like today, when this drops, we have two classes in Frisco, and we which is like just North of Dallas. It’s a really cool area of Dallas at air, actually. And I’ve been there many times and I love it. In fact, I was just there last week, just so then we’re gonna go Houston. (Brad: Tomorrow) Yep. I’ve actually never been to Houston. So I’m really excited about this.

Brad Crowell
Yeah, I’ve only driven through. I’ve never been there to be there.

Lesley Logan
Do we call them Houstonians? I don’t know. Well, tell me.

Brad Crowell
I’m gonna, I’m gonna go with the … I don’t know on that one.

Lesley Logan
I don’t know about that one. But you know, I’m sure that they’re Texas. They’ll tell us. Then we had to Nashville. And then it’s Atlanta, then Greensboro, North Carolina, and then Cleveland and then St. Louis. And then a little hang sesh with food and Denver. (Brad: Yeah.) So Denver peeps, you need to reach out and let us know if you want in on an info. Because there’s no way to buy a ticket for that situation.

Brad Crowell
Yeah. And we may have some spots left on this tour here. So if you wanted to come, hang and have a class, go to onlinepilatesclasses.com/tour.

Lesley Logan
Yeah. And if there are no space, spaces left, definitely let our team know, because you never know what happens with people. (Brad: It’s true.) We can like …

Brad Crowell
Yeah, keep us posted. Because also too, there’s a chance we may add additional classes if we get enough interest. So make sure you reach out.

Lesley Logan
And well, you can also just show up. And buy flashcards if you want to buy that as a gift for yourself. (Brad: Yeah, come meet us. Come say, hi.) You could say hi to the dogs, they will be at these events, probably hanging out in the van. But we’ll bring them out for people who are dog lovers. And don’t forget, if you are on the waitlist for Cambodia for 2023, you have emails in your inbox. (Brad: Oh yeah.) And I know you’re thinking, “Oh, I can wait till …” Like it’s fine. It’s like 10 9 11 months away. So here’s the deal, we actually go public with this offer. And very soon, and that means we’re not holding a spot for you. We’re not saving it for you. So right now the perk of being on the waitlist is that you hear about it early, and you get first dibs and it could sell out just by the waitlist. So make sure you snag your spot if that’s what you’re wanting to do. Especially before the price goes up. And before other people hear about it, you go to lesleylogan.co/retreat. And then one more thing that’s very important we want to make sure no one misses out on this. It’s like key to me. And it’s something I actually preach on when we are coaching people on raising their rates. But we are raising the Agency rate on January 1st. (Brad: That’s right. Yeah.) So if you’ve ever, ever been like, “Oh, someday I’m gonna do that.” Now is the time because it will never be the price that it is right now. (Brad: That’s true.) And here’s the deal. We, when you join Agency, whatever rate you join in it, is the rate you get to keep (Brad: Yeah) for as long as you’re an Agency member. So you’d be like think about the people been there for five years. Yeah. So don’t wait till next year because think about what you could have done in this last year. If you’ve wondered like what Agency members have done in the past year. Let me just tell you, we’ve had members open new studios. We’ve had several open studios, by the way, actually, (Brad: Yeah) at this point in the year. I think we’re at six studios this year that people have opened. (Brad: Yeah) You like, “I don’t want to open a studio. I just want it for myself.” Yeah, we have hundreds of people doing it, too. One of our members her her social media following has quadrupled in size, she’s had like 1000s, like 10s of 1000s in one month, and her online platform has had multiple people buy. So like, whether or not you wanna work for yourself, you want to open a studio, you want to run multiple studios. We got people for you. We got Erika Quests, we got Roxy Menzies, we got Alex Street. Everyone has had a podcast here.

Brad Crowell
Yeah. At the end of last year, one of our members hosted an international Pilates festival. (Lesley: Yeah) You know with so many things that have happened inside of Agency and …

Lesley Logan
Two of our, two of our pro members have teamed up to lead our mentorship together. (Brad: Yeah) They would never have met, like and trust each other in that way, if they had not had their Agency experience over these years …

Brad Crowell
People have launched teacher training programs, they’ve hired teachers, they’ve, you know, brought in new clients. There’s just all the things and we want that for you. Our mission is more bodies doing Pilates. And when we empower you to grow your business, it serves what what we’re trying to do as well. And we also have a lot of fun, and it takes away a lot of that anxiety.

Lesley Logan
It’s so fun. In Fridays, especially because it’s back fuck yeah Friday. It’s always wins all the time. And even people are begrudgingly doing a win because they needed a moment before. Like it’s always a win. So anyways, you if you want to book a exploratory call to see if Agency is right for you, then where do they go, Brad?

Brad Crowell
Just go to, DM us either, DM us on the pod or you can reach out through the Profitable Pilates website, just go to the contact page and reach out and we will happily set up a call and you’ll probably talk to me.

Lesley Logan
Yeah. So but again, that starts January 1st, please don’t call me on January 2nd, go, “Oh gosh, can I have the old rate?” You can’t actually and here’s why I won’t let you do that in your business. And so I can’t, I have to … operate in that integrity so that I can help you operate in your integrity. So anyways, we like to give that announcement. And that is happening in January 1st.

Brad Crowell
Yeah. Before we move on that we had an audience question. They said that the question was, hey LL, you said last year that you drove 7000 miles on your tour? And obviously we’re on a tour right now. How the heck do you pass all that time while you’re driving? I just couldn’t imagine being in the car that long myself.

Lesley Logan
I think people think that like you and I are just like chit chatting like 10 hours a day. You know what I mean? I think people are thinking about like the time you’re in a van with other people and like, oh my God, so long on time.

Brad Crowell
Yeah. Or they’re imagining Chevy Chase is, you know, like family vacations (Lesley: Yes) something like that.

Lesley Logan
Yes. So because it is 2022. And it’s been, you know, the 20 the 2000s for quite some time. There’s lots of ways you can like we are in the van. But we’re often listen to different podcasts or different books. (Brad: Yeah) We actually, probably we do the exact same thing that we do now. We have coffee together. We have meals together. But …

Brad Crowell
Yeah. I take long phone calls.

Lesley Logan
I hate that so much. But he has to and I won’t do them. So it’s fine.

Brad Crowell
Yeah, I do a lot of like, work with our team. And the phone calls keep me up, like, focused and driving and, you know, helps me stay driving on the road. And like … (Lesley: It is true, especially at night.) You want my mind to wander.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, I love my mind to be able to wander like so when he’s driving. He’s really on calls. When I’m driving, I am listening often to books that I want to evaluate for being podcast guests, or for being part of the book club for Agency members who want to be in a book club and read business books, or just things that are I’m curious about for my own self development. So I listened to a lot of that, of course, I listened to some my favorite pod. It’s also a great time to like reevaluate my pods. So because it’s a long drive, what I’ll do is I’ll like download a bunch of podcasts. I’m thinking of being on the regular, and I’ll let them I’ll see if I listened to them. Or if I’m like, “No, actually, I’m not into this at all.” Because it’s like, it can happen in so many consecutive episodes so I can I can get a lot done. So we…

Brad Crowell
I mean also too, it’s not like we’re I mean except for 2020 where we plowed through the drive in …

Lesley Logan
We did it in two and a half days each way.

Brad Crowell
Yeah, yeah, it was it was insane. Like two three days to get there but two and a half days to come back. We did the whole drive from Philadelphia till Vegas in 55 hours. (Lesley: Yeah) And so it literally we just did not stop we were driving for like 14 hours a day and then we would sleep and I would drive late and then we would overlap our sleep she would get up at seven and keep driving. I mean, that was that was brutal. Not gonna lie. That one was not my …

Lesley Logan
It wasn’t on a fun trip. (Brad: my preference but) We will stop it a lot of like, we’ll go oh, “What’s that thing?” And what like pullover …

Brad Crowell
Yeah we try to include some spontaneity. We also schedule in like, “Hey dinner with friends we only get to see once a year.” Or lunch or stop at a dog park, we try to take the dogs to the dog parks literally every day. (Lesley: Yeah) Just drive around in different dog parks.

Lesley Logan
Well, especially because they’re like they’re literally in the car not doing very much at all. (Brad: Yeah) And so we take and we try to find a dog park and then you’ll toss a ball for them and then I’ll try to get August to chase me it’s not he does not exercise. (Brad: Not so much.) But I’ll work out in the dog park so like I’m the one with the kettlebell swings, if you see someone doing a workout in a dog park, Hi, it’s me. Somewhere between here and Philly all the way back. But I think like it is correct, I think a lot of people think we’re just doing like a natural and put things and we’re just like sitting like looking out the window longingly. Like when does Colorado ever end? And is this Kansas? Or is this Colorado? Like, no, we, we there’s we’re there’s still things that we’re doing and we’re quite creative people. (Brad: Yeah.) So our minds are always producing stuff.

Brad Crowell
I love finding like fun little coffee shops and restaurants. So we spend time trying to find new new places to explore.

Lesley Logan
So here here’s so if you listen to the Rolf Potts episode, you heard how I talked about when we traveled we’ll looks like gluten free options. (Brad: Sure.) When we’re on the road, searching for oat milk, or gleif gluten free options will absolutely 1,000% help you find a locally owned business. (Brad: Yeah.) Even in these weird places were like, “No way LL did you find that there?” Yeah, I did. We found we found … (Brad: … we are in Texas.) No, we found that vegan place in South Carolina. Remember, we were in South Carolina. We were in guests with South Carolina. Remember we’re like went to that … (Brad: Oh yes.) It was, I don’t know the name of the town but like I’m not … I’m not … and Brad so we’re gonna have lunch there. I was like, “No, no way.”

Brad Crowell
Yeah, it was near outside the … state park.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, we have an incredible and I was like … (Brad: We found a food truck one time.) A vegan food truck (Brad: Yeah) that was so unbelievable, I was actually sad how far away it was because I would have ordered again. And I was like, “Dude, more food truck somewhere else?” No, they didn’t. But so use your like, unique thing you’re interested in to find fun things to do a long road trips. We also love to shop at vintage stores.

Brad Crowell
Yeah, that’s fun, too. (Lesley: And) we try to go like, I think some of the craziest vintage stores we’ve been at or you know, like thrift shop slash vintage shops where in Texas. (Lesley: Oh yeah.) Like crazy stuff. You know like, “Wow, like how long has it been since anyone has picked this up and dusted it off?” Like …

Lesley Logan
Yeah, there’s some funny things there. I also got like, shout out to downtown Tucson. (Brad: Yeah that’s fun.) You have some cool ass shit. I’ve really loved it.

Brad Crowell
There’s like, there’s no… there’s like one street of cute funky like local (Lesley: Yeah) and all the things …

Lesley Logan
Yeah, there’s (Brad: shops. Yeah.) Anyways, we are not, don’t cry for us.

Brad Crowell
Oh another thing we love to do is national parks.

Lesley Logan
We do love a national park. (Brad: Yeah) We really really do.

Brad Crowell
This trip we, well, we’ve already driven through Saguaro National Park in Arizona.

Lesley Logan
We did that. It was beautiful. It was beautiful. We don’t know which parks we’re doing this trip. But I will say so just to go back to your to your question. Thank you for asking it. Trips don’t have to be like about the destination. It is that cliche. It’s the journey. It really is a journey. Like (Brad: Yeah, has to be.) I remember …

Brad Crowell
7000 miles is a lot of miles.

Lesley Logan
Yeah. I I remember more about like, the things we do along the way, then oftentimes the thing we do when we get there best because we’re wherever we’re going. It’s often like if we do the same thing every year sounds like that. But like I really do find it fun to find random coffee shops. And then sometimes we go the same route. So we’re like, (Brad: Yeah, yeah.) “Oh, there’s that place we can go.” (Brad: Oh there’s the shop we run at last time.) Yeah, that was so great and so it’s it’s so fun to do. But don’t be afraid to like branch out, get off the beaten path. And then and then it is then when I do let my mind wander. It’s not like I’ve been looking at this field for seven hours are still here, (Brad: Kansas) like fuck (Brad: Nebraska) But I’ve listened to some amazing books on tape. I mean, like just some really epic ones. If you’re wondering what are some great roadtrip books to listen to Educated if you haven’t yet listened to that and by Tara Westover. (Brad: Yeah) Amazing. I started with Brad trying to take a nap. And then I had to rewind so he could take it and then we literally wanted to finish the book. And so we were with your family like, oh, they come in in the car with us. We’re taking our own car. We’re taking our own car. Turn it on. So that one is so uniquely interesting.

Brad Crowell
We also do like introspection, like reflection on the year, every drive, every drive and we we talk about like, what can we you know do to better serve our members that are an OPC and an Agency.

Lesley Logan
We talked about a lot of ideas, we get rid a lot of ideas. (Brad: Yeah) We debate about ideas. Like, you’d be surprised how fast the day goes, even though you’re just like sitting around like it really does go fast. So anyways, if you need roadtrip books, I’m ha… reached out to the @be_it_pod. We’ll put it in another solo episode, but …

Brad Crowell
And go listen to Rolf Potts (Lesley: Yes) episode, which was actually very recently it was (Lesley: very recently at the time …) episode 151.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, yeah. So go listen to that. And then, you know, if you are driving to your destination, try not to like drive. “Uhh i have to drive.” What can be fun about the drive? And try to find something like, I remember one of the drives we’re gonna do, we’re gonna stop at a crystal place, like a ground where you could like dig up your own crystals. (Brad: Oh yeah) You know what I mean? Like, or, like find something fun along the way. I don’t care if it’s like the biggest haystack or the biggest corn maze I would never do that. But like nothing would give me more anxiety than being in one of those. But um, but try to like find something unique along the way, the internet is amazing y’all you can literally put in like things that no one would think to do in X place and they’ll somebody from like eatery or you know, whatever, weird, whatever we are …(Brad: the greatest) the greatest. I mean, like I Googled today, like, best Thanksgiving dinners in Las Vegas, and like I got 17 restaurants to choose from. So like, believe it or not, someone’s probably curated something for you to do just look it up.

Brad Crowell
Love it.

Okay, now let’s talk about Heather Monahan. When her retiring boss’s daughter fired her. Heather Monahan began to bet on herself. In the past five years, she has become a best selling author, two times over. The podcast host of Creating Confidence, and was awarded the top 50 keynote speaker of 2022. (Lesley: That’s huge.) Yeah, that’s pretty crazy. And in 2020, she was top 40 keynote speaker. She does all of this while being an incredible single mom, to her son, and working to empower individuals to use their strengths to achieve success.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, I I really, I really enjoy like what she’s doing in this world. And I think it’s, it’s necessary and how cool that she had this career her whole life. And that’s one area that she was a top dog in that, like she really was. And then because she was fired, and she couldn’t just like, go get the same job somewhere else because of like, whatever those those clauses are, she had to bet on herself. And it allowed her to (Brad: Yeah) like completely switch (Brad: She is a non compete.) Yes, thank you. That’s the exact word for it. She was able to like, just try out something completely different and new. And now she’s a tough speaker. She’s traveling the world. She was on the Dr. Phil show. You know what I mean? Like … like, come on. So y’all literally like, if you know someone in your life who has been fired, and you probably like, “Oh my God, I can’t let that happen that.” Like we hear about our parents all the time all the time, like, “Oh, so one so got fired, so and so got laid off.” I feel so bad for them. It’s the what if it’s the best fucking thing that ever happened for their life? (Brad: Yeah) What if it is? It probably is, I mean, we can go back to the last episode, last recap. Your divorce, … clearly was the best thing that ever happened to you. You wouldn’t met me, you would never marry me if you hadn’t been through that. So like, I think we all have to, like, take a moment on and when we see someone having a worst experience, like, obviously see them and feel that but then also be there to like, remind them that they’re gonna like, they can bet on themselves, just like she did. So one of the things that she I’m going to pre phrase what she said, atually. She said, you don’t have to know the entire plan before trying something new. Yeah, that’s right. Just keep moving forward with the faith that you’ll figure it out because you don’t know what you don’t know. (Brad: Yeah) And ultimately, you can’t connect the dots until you’re looking back. So you have to keep moving forward. You know, y’all

Brad Crowell
Yeah. So I think I think that the idea of you don’t know what you don’t know. You know, and then that really the it’s the reflection on the past that allows you to decide like, you know, you can start to say, “Oh, I’m glad I did this. I’m glad I did that. I’m glad this.” You won’t know that until you do it.

Lesley Logan
Well and correct. And you try it out and also like you might not realize what’d you do know? Like you don’t know what you don’t know. It doesn’t have to be like it’s not a bad thing. Like, you might not realize you have this like skill or talent like the other day when I like pick up the chopsticks my right hand. I was actually really amazing at it. I didn’t know that. (Brad: You did?) Yeah, you were there.

Brad Crowell
Oh, I didn’t realize it was your right hand.

Lesley Logan
Yeah. I was like … look at me pick up this carpaccio with these with my right hand. I’m lucky to y’all. And I actually like treat chopsticks like, like a fork. So anyways, I think that that whole section that was just talking about is like such a key, a key thing to remind yourself and you haven’t seen the episode yet, save it, you can go back to that. Because on your worst day can feel like this is the worst that ever happened to me, it truly can’t be the best if you just keep taking the next step forward. And, and trusting that it’s okay if you don’t know the entire plan. Like when we’re coaching people in Agency, like I keep feeling like I take two steps forward. And then one step back. And I’m like, yeah, what if it was to review the dots, so you can take the next few steps forward in the right direction?

Brad Crowell
Yeah. I think there was another section a part of this year, though, that I thought was interesting was, you know, to move forward with the faith, that you’re going to be serving yourself well. Because you will figure it out as you go along. You know, but the idea that you clearly don’t know the future, you know, and unless someone has predetermined the path for you, and like shared your career plan, sometimes that might happen, but usually not. You know, what, as you move forward, if you know where you want to get to, along the way, you don’t know how will happen to get there. But you know, you kind of have this big future vision down the road. And when you move forward, it’s with the intention of getting to that end game, you know, just the bet… in between, you don’t really you don’t have any idea what’s going to happen. So

Lesley Logan
Yeah. And that’s okay. (Brad: Yeah) It’s, it’s actually kind of fun, it’s going back to our road trip, like, we know, we’re gonna get to Philly. We know we have stops along the way. We don’t know which stores we might stop at, or what people we might run into or like, what could happen. And that’s what makes it the most fun. That’s why we keep doing it. (Brad: Yeah) What did you love?

Brad Crowell
I really loved when she talked about confidence and that it ebbs and flows. And I thought that was interesting, because, you know, obviously, her podcast is about confidence, her first book is about confidence. And you just associate confidence with certain people. And you never imagined that there, you just think, “Oh, that person is confident.” So they’re clearly always confident 100% of the time. And she said, “No, that’s not that’s not how it works.” you know. For her specifically, she said she felt super confident in her work in her career, she had spent 20 years climbing, you know, the corporate ladder in the world of radio doing sales. And but she said she didn’t feel so confident in her relationships. You know, that afterwards, she could, you know, quit and land on her feet. So there was like, a lot of uncertainty there. And she said, there’s not nobody is confident in all situations, there’s always self doubt, that self doubt is actually part of the growth process.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, I think I think it’s just being aware of where you feel less confident in your life is more important than were like going, “I’m not confidnent in that.” It’s like, just the going like thinking about Lena Franklin. Awareness is actually part of enlightenment. And so if you can understand like, “Oh, I’m super confident at work. I’m not confident at relationships.” Okay. So you’re less confident in relationships. And that means that there’s room for growth. You know, what I mean? I feel I feel like it’s really easy for us to put a label on ourselves especially around confidence and then therefore we’re just not confident there. So we don’t work on that there but it’s like if you can have that awareness and be okay with your confidence ebbing and flowing, a) you’ll be a real human being, people actually like you just like people like Heather she is like the queen of these things. And she’s an all this stuff and like she’s a likable person. You know, people want to be friends with her, people want to have her around on the things, because she actually is a real human being who is okay with her confidence ebbing and flowing. And understand that some areas she feels stronger than others. And then you …

Brad Crowell
Lena’s episode was 77, by the way.

Lesley Logan
77. Oh, what it like that’s like a good number for her. Like so anyway, I really enjoyed both of our whole conversation. I thought there’s a lot that we can take away from it.

Brad Crowell
Yeah, yeah. And I think that, you know, in in my my personal experience, you know, having been on stage. Confidence was something that was built. (Lesley: I think confident) And definitely I wasn’t confident the first time I got on stage.

Lesley Logan
And so then what you got on stage again? (Brad: Yeah) You got on stage again? (Brad: Yeah) And like we …

Brad Crowell
Because I saw myself being a performer. I was like, “I am that person.” And in order for me to get to that place where I am that person, I gotta practice, I gotta do it.

Lesley Logan
Right. If you are a person who is onstage performing, then you have to get on stages and perform. (Brad: Yeah) Like, like, we were just listening on the other day. (Brad: I was just thinking about this.) So we’re listening to Chelsea Handler, (Brad: Yeah) and she gives advice. We also listen to Iliza Shlesinger and just in case you’re listening because I want you on the show. Hi, I love I love I love listening to the questions I get. I love the … I really resonate with a lot of their answers. But there was a woman, a person who wanted to become a comedian. (Brad: Yes) And in …

Brad Crowell
… she already was a comedian. (Lesley: She already a comedian.) But she had an upcoming gig and she was worried about she was opening for someone and she was like, “How do I gain confidence in this?”

Lesley Logan
Yeah, because where they live, there’s like one Comedy Club and like, “I’ve got two weeks to get my confidence up.” (Brad: Right.) And Chelsea was like, okay, well, normally, I’d say like, go get on every stage, you can. But there’s one stage to be on, and you’re about to be on it. So you need to go to the grocery store and the park and just do your set in front of people. It’s like …

Brad Crowell
Yeah. She said, “Do it, do, do your set in front of your parents.”

Lesley Logan
Do you … Yeah. Do you set like

Brad Crowell
And she said, “Well, I don’t think they’ll appreciate my humor.” And the response was perfect. All the more reason you should do it in front of your parents.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, yeah. Cuz that will create confidence, because you’ll have done in front of people who don’t appreciate it and like, so the reality is, is that confidence comes from putting yourself in a situation where you feel less confident. And then following through with the thing that you said you were going to do. (Brad: Yeah) End of story if (Brad: Yeah) you don’t feel like you’re a runner, you have to go, you have to say, “I’m gonna go for a run for one block.” And then you run one block. And guess what, you just dropped money in your confidence bucket of running, and I’m a runner. And so yeah, you didn’t run your marathon. But we’re not working to that confidence, yet. We’re just actually trying to show up for the thing we said we’re gonna do and do the thing.

Brad Crowell
And even even with this ebbing and flowing that she was talking about, nobody’s confident in all situations. I had been on stage for 10 years, when I got invited to a birthday party of a dear friend of mine, and I decided to write a song and perform it on stage, but solo. (Lesley: Oh) And my whole career had been with the band. And in the band, I wasn’t singing. I mean, I was singing, but it wasn’t the lead person. I was like, second, and that was, you know, that was fine. I, but I had been on stage like, put me on stage with a group of people anytime. And I’m like, “I’m in. It’s totally okay.” But put me on stage alone. And I was like, whoa. And I was like, really feeling that one. I was not confident.

Lesley Logan
You know what, that’s so funny. Because remember when we were at Momentum Fest, and it was a first year of Momentum Fest, and I had like 80 plus people in this room. And it was pre pandemic. So it was like, had a break from teaching and all. And there’s like my peers in the front row. And there’s people like who hire me for things in the front row. And then there’s all these people who were so excited to be in that room. And you were miking me up and I was like, “Is this thing on?” You’re like, “No.” And I said, “I’m really, like, I’m really nervous.” (Brad: Yeah) And he’s like you said, “Why? What is, this is what you do all the time.” And it’s so funny. I think sometimes we forget that we we put a lot of pressure on ourselves, which then makes us doubt ourselves, even in situations where we would normally be confident. And (Brad: Sure) so I think if you’re finding your competence ebbing and flowing in areas where you normally are confident, it’s just time to take a look back and it probably means you really care about that particular moment. (Brad: Right) And then look back at the wins you’ve had in other moments like it and you can draw on that confidence.

Brad Crowell
It goes back to your favorite takeaway, where ultimately you can’t connect the dots until you’re looking back.

Lesley Logan
I know I just connected a bunch.

Brad Crowell
Yeah. I love it. All right, so finally, let’s talk about those BE IT action items. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your convo with Heather Monahan?

Lesley Logan
Well, she had a three step process and it’s from her recent book, so you all go get Overcome Your Villains. Especially if you like, feel like you have a villain in your life. You gotta you gotta read this book. And it’s called B A K.

Brad Crowell
Yeah, she called it BAK.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, BAK. So it is. Number one, what is your belief? Oh, did we talk about beliefs last week. We did. Sorry, you don’t get to get over this. What is your belief? Number two, immediately take action. So for example, when she was fired, she immediately posted on social media,” I’ve just been fired.”

Brad Crowell
Yeah. And then let’s do all three. So what is your belief, immediately take action and then what is the knowledge you surround yourself with is number three.

Lesley Logan
Okay. (Brad: Yeah) So you got all three everyone, what is your belief? Immediately take action. And then what is your knowledge? So belief, action, knowledge. Okay, so she had been fired. And and so going, “Oh I’ve been fired. Nobody likes me. What am I gonna do?” She actually was like, “Hey, everyone, if I’ve ever helped you in any way, I need to hear from you now.”

Brad Crowell
She posted that on social media, “Hi, I’ve been fired,” period. Wow, that takes guts, right. Like that talk about confidence right there. And like just taking action. Because if I’ve ever helped you in any way, I need to hear from you now, when she when she posted that someone that she had helped, reached out to her and invited her to go on the Elvis Duran show. And that changed her life.

Lesley Logan
Change her life. And also like, can we just go back to betting on yourself? So be it till you see it like she bet on herself. She didn’t know what’s going to happen. But she acted as if like, I’m gonna bet on myself. And if I bet on myself, I’m gonna put this thing out there that I’m only going to get great things. And something good is going to come from this, like, you know what I mean? Like, I love that. So then and then what knowledge can you surround yourself with? So don’t just consume information from randos. We’ve talked about this before y’all on the podcast. Don’t ask your your Uncle Joe, information, like advice around something that they’re not knowledgeable in. (Brad: Right) And, and I’ve even mentioned this on one of the podcasts like, make sure you’re really clear on whose opinions of you matter. Because in our family, we love them so much. And many of them listening to this, hi guys. But some people like it’s not that I don’t care about what they have to say about me, but they don’t actually understand what we do want on a day to day basis. And so some of the things that they say, come from fear and worry (Brad: Yeah) around us. It’s not, it’s not that they don’t actually want us to succeed. It’s not about holding us back, but they’re worried for us. So then they share that fear. And then (Brad: Right and that) it’s knowledge I didn’t need right now. You know.

Brad Crowell
Yeah, I mean, I think also it’s like, you know, you, you know, why would you ask a golfer about to running on a track? You know, why would you ask someone who’s had a, you know, job for their whole career about being an entrepreneur, like, you know, it’s, it seems obvious when you say it that way, like you’re like, well, duh, wouldn’t, they’re not a professional swimmer. And I’m trying to be in the Olympics.

Lesley Logan
But you do it all the time. (Brad: But we do it all the time.) You have that friend that you’ve kept too long. You kept them way too long. Ladies, we keep our friends too long. I don’t understand that. And then they say something. And then if you really took a step back, you go, “I know they always say mean things to me.” Then why are you like actually using their opinion to weigh in on the things that you’re doing? I’m asking, it’s not a rhetorical question. You need to answer out loud. I can’t hear you. But you can hear you. Because it all has an impact on your life.

Brad Crowell
Yeah, totally does. So anyway, the three step BAK process, beliefs, action, and knowledge. What is your belief, take immediate action and then three was the knowledge that you surround yourself with. I thought those made a whole lot of sense.

Lesley Logan
Oh, easily, easily actionable (Brad: Yeah) actions. You know how I love that. So you guys get her books. (Brad: Yeah, check those out.) And listen to her podcast.

Brad Crowell
And thanks for joining us today.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, really. We are so happy that you’re here. (Brad: Yeah) And thank you all. Y’all know, we have some of the most reviews of any podcasts in our age, (Brad: Yeah) not our age, like personally, but the age of the podcast. Like it’s insane. So we couldn’t have done that without you …

Brad Crowell
No … You know, we need each and every one of you. Thank you.

Lesley Logan
And thank you for sharing this with your friends. I know sometimes we were like, I actually heard you say, tag a friend. How do I do that? That’s a great question. So if you don’t know how to tag a friend and you want to know how to tag a friend, will you DM me on the platform you’re trying to tag a friend? What does that mean? It means like, letting that person know that this is for them. (Brad: DM means direct message.) And DM means direct message. So if you will find the Be It pod on the platform, you like to use that’s Facebook (Brad: Oh, actually we …) TikTok or Instagram.

Brad Crowell
We set up an email, you can email us now (Lesley: Oh) at [email protected]

Lesley Logan
Check that out, (Brad: Yeah) [email protected] So so tell us which platform you are wanting to share or tag a friend. And also tell us which platform you listen to your podcasts on. Is it YouTube? Is it Spotify? Is it Amazon, but Amazon, yeah you can listen to Amazon. Is it Apple? Is it Google Play? Is it 17 other options out there? There’s so many we’re on every single thing. But if you do that we have someone who will help you, literally tell you how to do it. So because we want we know that you actually want to share them. So we want to help you do that. We just need to know a couple of details. And thank you for doing that. (Brad: Yeah) Until next time, Be It Till You See It.

Lesley Logan
That’s all I’ve got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate this show and leave a review. And, follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over on IG at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us help others to BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!

Lesley Logan
Be It Till You See It is a production of Bloom Podcast Network.

Brad Crowell
It’s written, produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan. And me Brad Crowell. Our associate producer is Amanda Frattarelli.

Lesley Logan
Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.

Brad Crowell
Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan
Special thanks to our designer Mesh Herico for creating all of our visuals, (which you can’t see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all the video each week, so you can.

Brad Crowell
And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each episode, so you can find it on our website. And finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

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