6 Steps to Reinforcing

Worthiness

Ep. 18 with Lesley & Brad

“It is a decision to be positive or negative. But it’s also a habit.”

Brad Crowell

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Click to read more about:       Lesley Logan       Brad Crowell

 

Show Notes

Brad and Lesley break down the interview with Sandra Chuma, reflecting on her willingness to share her story, how vulnerable she was about her mental crash, the realizations it caused, and the project it started.

If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected].

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:
• Positivity, negativity – it’s a habit. It’s a decision.
• Feeling stuck
• Rising tide lifts all boats
• The meaning of success

Episode References/Links:
• Tiny Habits by BJ Fogg – https://amzn.to/3x3KLcP 
• The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks – https://amzn.to/3wXIAHX 
• Sandra’s IG – @sandra.chuma
• Sandra’s website – sandrachuma.com
• Worthy’s IG – @iamworthy.co
• Worthy’s website – iamworthy.co

Transcript

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I’m Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I’ve trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it’s the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to out yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It’s a practice, not a perfect. Let’s get started.

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Lesley Logan
Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co host in life, Brad and I are going to dig into the inspirational combo I had with Sandra Chuma in our last episode. If you haven’t listened to that interview, feel free to pause this now, go back and listen to that one and then come back and join us, or you do you. We have already discussed this. I love, I just today I listened to a recap episode before I listened to the episode. It’s like Blinkist but for podcast, we’ll give it a name. Alright, okay, so y’all.

Brad Crowell
I love it.

Lesley Logan
I’m so glad you’re here. I can’t wait for us to talk about Sandra Chuma. But before that, I have to say we are two days away from kicking off Agency MINI number five. And Brad, how excited are you for this?

Brad Crowell
Oh, it’s gonna be amazing. We have had a bunch of people already sign up. And it is it’s really exciting to see people getting enthusiastic about moving their businesses forward. And the program that we have in store for them they don’t even know they know it’s coming. It is it’s gonna be a whirlwind. It’s been amazing. If you are wondering what the heck we’re even talking about, you can go to ProfitablePilates.com/mini. And if we still have room at this point, by the time you hear this, you can you can sign up if you if there’s no room, you will find the waitlist there. And you can find out for the next time. But basically, it’s a seven day mini program of our open enrollment, ongoing coaching, business coaching for fitness business instructors. And it’s a ton of fun.

Lesley Logan
It’s so much fun. So here’s the thing, Brad and I are not big fans of Facebook, but we do use it for this program. And it is a frickin’ party. Every time we do this have over 100 people in there. And it’s just people sharing their goals and getting strategy, actual strategies and taking super messy action. There’s always wins to be had. Like, I love letting people in. It’s so much fun to let them in the group. It’s so much fun to see why they’re there. My notifications blow up like crazy. Brad and I don’t even like, we don’t even take calls or friends. We like anyone isn’t asking us hang out. We’re like…

Brad Crowell
We order dinner all week. Like, there’s no time.

Lesley Logan
After August 7… We get the dog sitter like, I mean, I work out, but that’s about the only thing I do outside of a Facebook group. So anyways, you have two days to sign up at ProfitablePilates.com/mini and again, if it’s sold out, which it always does. If it is you’ll get the waitlist and just put yourself on there. And don’t worry, we’ll check it on you. We love to help people with their fitness businesses. Okay, so, babe, do we have a question from the audience?

Brad Crowell
We totally have a question.

Lesley Logan
I’m super excited about this.

Brad Crowell
Yeah. Well…

Lesley Logan
Oh, let me read it.

Brad Crowell
I would love for you to read it. Yes!

Lesley Logan
I’m gonna read it. Okay, here we go. Okay, this is from someone who DM’d me at the @be_it_pod. That’s where you can actually, if you have questions for us, you just DM us there. And the question is, here it goes: I have a question for you regarding how to handle and help negative friends. I have a friend who’s a gorgeous person, great spirit awesome pizzazz. Currently, though, she’s on a really negative spiral. Because she’s so funny, they are really entertaining stories, but I feel like she’s living in “rant city” and can’t get out. Like you gals said in the pod, she’s looking for ways to be right. I want to help her see that she can attract positive, not just negative, but then don’t want to come across lecturing. Do you have a way you share this type of message with these people? I don’t want to remove her from my life and I also work with her so the contact is frequent. I was thinking maybe a book, but also have no idea. I know she’s open to change, also as it’s stuff we’ve talked about. So that’s, you know, that’s tough. Negative people are hard.

Brad Crowell
Yeah, you know, I, I absolutely believe that it is a decision to be positive or negative. But it’s, it’s a… it’s also a habit, right? And that’s the hard part, is that we, you know, just in the same way that we, you know, habitually walk with our shoulders down or whatever, turn our feet out from a physical perspective. There is a mental habit that we build for ourselves as well in how we think and it’s just so easy to go right back to that mindset of, you know, the world’s out to get me or everything is against me or it’s really it’s a combination. It’s actually this question couldn’t be more poignant because if you went back and listen to Sandra’s episode, she actually talks about the, you know, the “world being against you” mentality and the stories that we tell ourselves. But it’s also the story that the world tells ourselves. So, you know, this is a cycle. This is a habit, and it is a really hard thing to break. However, if you are going to be recommending a book to someone, I have a feeling I know which one Lesley is gonna say… And it’s Tiny Habits.

Lesley Logan
Oh, which is also at Sandra does. That’s actually funny. Yes, totally Tiny Habits. I was also thinking The Big Leap, but um, you know, I love what you said, there, it is a habit for her. And it’s a choice. Um, I’m also gonna say, you know, you wrote that she’s funny, and the stories are really entertaining. So she’s getting attention from people laughing at these stories. And she might have a story that she’s telling herself that if I rant until a funny story, that’s why people pay attention to me. (Brad: Sure.) So there, there actually might be that she thinks this is actually how she gets people to pay attention to her, or that this is like who she is, and this persona that she’s wearing, and who would she be if she stops being like this. So I definitely love the Tiny Habits book. And, and you’ll hear a lot about that with Sandra, too. I in The Big Leap is a great one, you know, it is hard. I’m going to talk a little bit about boundaries. It is hard if you work with someone, it’s kind of difficult to put those boundaries up. But what I would suggest if you cannot cut the person out of your life, who’s being negative, be the person you wish that they were to them. So, (Brad: Yeah) just literally like, Oh, you don’t rant you don’t say negative things like be really conscious of like, giving them what you wish they were giving you. And reciprocity is real. And it’s also subconscious. So it’s super cool. The other thing I would say is like books are really awesome. They also take time, and if someone is not like if someone doesn’t read it going, “Yes, this is what I’ve been looking for!” They won’t… there’s a stack of books on the table that I’ve been wanting my dad to read. I don’t think that they’ve moved in order at all. So what I would say is send her podcasts like these. Actually…

Brad Crowell
Yeah, actually, this is a lot more digestible than a book.

Lesley Logan
Yeah!

Brad Crowell
You know.

Lesley Logan
And so that’s what I would do is like send, send them the inspiration that you wish that they were listening to. And then also just remember that it is their choice and not your responsibility. (Brad: Yeah) So that is hard because you work with them. But if you really feel that they’re taking you down, you are just going to have to come up with some really great things. Something that I suggested to someone in my coaching group actually was like, pull a book out of what I learned about celebrities. When I worked at Fred Segal, I would meet tons of celebrities and they would walk around with the phone. You can’t see me on a podcast, but the YouTubers you can see me, they’d walk around with their cell phone up to their ear. I swear they’re listening to the time. I swear it was. “And the time is now 4:01 PST beeeeeep!” But like, I don’t know, because they would do that. Why? If you have a phone to your ear, people don’t talk to you. (Brad: Right) So you might need to put a phone to your ear and act like, “Oh, I got a call.” And your phone can be on “Do not disturb” people are used to phones ringing not hearing it. Give yourself some outs. Then distance yourself and build up your resistance to negative energy. I hope that helps.

Brad Crowell
Yeah, I think I like what you said. I appreciate what you said. (Lesley: Oh thanks!) Yeah.

Lesley Logan
I appreciate what you say.

Brad Crowell
Oh so cute. All right. Now let’s talk about Sandra Chuma. (Lesley: Yes) All right, everyone. If you didn’t listen to the last episode, Sandra Chuma is a shining beacon of hope. (Lesley: Literally) Being around her just makes you want to smile.

Lesley Logan
We haven’t even been around her yet.

Brad Crowell
I guess even on zoom calls. First of all, she she’s got an incredible story about growing up in a hut with a mud floor. Then going off to college, and eventually building an eight figure company with her husband. But secondly, her goal, her focus to empower others is simply inspirational. Like, what-have-you-done-with-your-life-recently, inspirational. (Lesley: Yeah) Her experiences, her life experiences, her internal struggles, which she was so open and sharing. I have shaped the way she thinks and has changed what she does for the betterment of the entire world. (Lesley: Yeah, I know.) So, she’s awesome.

Lesley Logan
She’s amazing. And if you don’t if you ever have a chance to watch this podcast, hers is definitely one worth watching. Just the way she speaks and the grace she has and, like, when he says a shining beacon of hope, you can see her shine. (Brad: Yeah), beacon of hopeness. Okay, well, here’s what I love that she said. Giving! Her father said you’re success will mean, will never mean anything unless you use it to help others, unless you use it to reach back and bring others with you. What is the meaning of success if you’re only doing it for you? So I love this so much. Because I think we, I think it’s really easy to put “just” next to whatever it is that we’re doing. And we go, I’m just this, I’m just this. And when you put that word in front of you, you also just become really obsessed with what you’re doing. And something that I started years ago, and I’m so grateful for you, Brad, because you’ve been able to help me do this is everything we do. OPC it’s all about bringing that entire community with us Profitable Pilates and Agency. It’s like we had success. Now, let me show you how we did it so we can bring other people with us. I want to rise all the tides like oh, there’s only the one tide… but there’s many oceans…

Brad Crowell
We’ll go with it. (Lesley: I’m just rising the tides) All 55 tides.

Lesley Logan
But at any rate, like and it’s also why we started this podcast. Like, I… it feels like a hamster wheel if you’re just doing things for yourself. Or it can feel a little stucky, stucky’s not a word. But you get stuck.

Brad Crowell
We’re just making it all up today.

Lesley Logan
Just making all words today. (Brad: Well, I think) The point is that I want people to come with me on this journey. Because what’s the point if they’re not?

Brad Crowell
Yeah, I agree. 100%. And, but in context with what she was specifically saying, she was saying how she definitely had a crash, you know, where she built this epic company, which, you know, she she really struggled with feeling guilty about not being happy, because she literally grew up in a village in a hut and now she has an eight figure company, and she wasn’t happy. And she’s like, my, I’m living a life that my grandparents would never have dreamed of. And my cousins would give their right arm for and but I’m not happy about it. And I don’t understand. And and I think that that was the beginning of her revelation. Really, listening to her her father, about you know, what is the meaning of success, if it’s not, you know, if it’s only for you, or your success will never mean anything unless you use it to help others unless you use it to reach back and bring others with you. And that I mean, that’s like, you know, it sounds like this nice thing you want to hear. But she lived it. she she she literally experienced it where suddenly, at the top, she’s like that… Nothing’s different for me now. But I’m apparently “here,” whatever that means…

Lesley Logan
Well, I think it’s because we all just are going, like, we’re all going for what we think the world thinks success is, and then we expect that that to make us happy. That’s why we’re the Be It Till You See It podcast exists, be the thing you want to be before you have it. (Brad: Yeah.) You know, be the happy person you want to be when you have the thing, and you’ll be happier all the way there.

Brad Crowell
Yeah. And the journey. I mean, it’s she talked about that to where it’s about the journey and enjoying where you’re at today, right now, you know, instead of this, you know, angst that we, we like, put on ourselves for you know, I’m gonna when when this happens, then I’ll be you know, happy. Yeah, it’s…

Lesley Logan
I mean, her rock bottom definitely helped her Be It Till She Sees It, for sure. But, you know, the other thing I think is really important is that this is not something she said, but something I’m thinking of is like, we can’t ever, we don’t want to ever take away anyone’s rock bottoms like that, that place is literally where the seeds of so many things come from. And so if you are, (Brad: It’s where all those tides come from), yes! That is where the tides come from! But the point is, is that if you feel like someone you know is not acting as if it’s not Being It Till They See It, or you feel like you know, you’re not there yet. If you’re you feel like you’re at a rock bottom right now you’re listening to this, that is like where you’re supposed to be and you can’t take that from yourself. And I have been at rock bottoms. Brad has been at rock bottoms and like, those were pivotal moments in our lives that actually changed us for the best, the best versions of ourselves. And so, anyway…

Brad Crowell
I do I do think that there’s room for those rock bottoms to change you for the worse, you know… But fortunately, by, you know, surrounding, you know, yourself with people who are looking out for you and, you know, like, like making sure you go through it, you know, you can learn from it. And I know for me when, you know, when I was getting a divorce in the past, it was it was a, it literally changed who I am today – bar none. Like, nothing else was more impactful on who I am today than that experience. And it was a terrible experience. I hated every moment. It was so painful. But it was it was such a transformative place to be. And I noticed, you know, Sandra talked a little bit about that with her bathroom floor. So you have to go back and listen. (Lesley: Yes.) But… yeah.

Lesley Logan
But also I think you made a really good point and then we’ll talk about he liked is that it’s the people around you. And thank goodness for people like her father who could… who could say something to her that would make her think and change what she was doing. And, and y’all have to check out what she’s up to because it is… she is bringing you with her. She really is. What did you love?

Brad Crowell
Okay, so she said this other thing that I thought was really vulnerable. She, she said, you know, life was hard, but it was fine. And she had this incredible community, we’re just talking about community. She had this incredible community where she grew up in Zimbabwe. And then she went off to college. And she was out of her community. She was away from her people her support, you know, her her loving, you know, family, friends and neighbors. And she said, that was actually the beginning of when she began, she she actually said this amazing word, “not-enoughness.” That’s what she began experiencing this not-enoughness, you know, and she said, she went to school in England. And they talked about Zimbabwe, you know, if Zimbabwe is in the news, it’s talked about as a third world country, you know, and so she became very small in her her thinking, and she never shared. She said, It took years for her to start to tell people where she came from. And she said she was lucky enough to get away with, you know, her accent was British English. That’s how they speak in Zimbabwe, so nobody could ever question where she was from. But she never told anyone that she was from Zimbabwe. And I thought you actually, you actually hinted at it earlier. This the, when we put the word “just” in front of ourselves, you know, we’re doing exactly that, “Oh, I’m just a, I’m just a teacher,” or, “I’m just a fitness teacher. I’m just,” you know, “a Pilates teacher,” those… that kind of story. You know, “I’m just from a village.” You know, “I’m just from a third world country,” whatever. It’s consistently reinforcing this negative view, there’s not-enoughness that Sandra was talking about. Where today, she said she’s so proud to be from Zimbabwe, from a village of people who loved her and cared for her, you know, and how much that’s completely changed, you know, her life, that, that support that she had in that space. So, anyway, I was thinking about how we are applying that to ourselves in the different scenarios that we’re going through.

Lesley Logan
Oh, yeah. I mean, I think, whether or not you’re from a small town, or a small country, or, you know, it’s so easy for us to play small and not feel like we’re enough. And I think it’s so important that you just, you’re enough, just because you are who you are, like, and that’s so it sounds so cliche. And so like, whoo, whoo. It’s a one-woo room in here. Like, there’s only room for one woo, and the truth is.

Brad Crowell
It so woo!

Lesley Logan
It’s a woo! Well, I’m making “one woo” a thing. But the reality is, is that, yeah, it’s interesting how this theme of this episode is about the stories we tell ourselves. It’s a story you’re telling yourself, and you can tell yourself a different story. And I know it’s really hard, but the subconscious mind is actually really malleable. And so the more you remove just from any way you introduce yourself, or any way you talk about yourself, that will go the more you actually talk yourself up. I tell people all the time, you don’t like saying that you’re a Pilates teacher, you feel like people don’t take you seriously for that when you have this kind of advice or this advice, then call yourself something else. You’re a wellness expert, whatever, you get to change.

Brad Crowell
You can say I change people’s lives. (Lesley: Yeah), they’re gonna be like, What?

Lesley Logan
I know. I know. When one day Brad introduced us as something else. And I was like, whoo, okay, I’m standing taller, you know, so I mean, I just changed my job title. And I feel so much prouder because of my new title. I’m the new I am the Chief Vision Officer. What? CVO, that is so much better than I was calling myself before. So if you are feeling small or not enough, start with how you introduce yourself and just start changing it there. That’s a great takeaway. (Brad: Love it) All right.

Brad Crowell
All right. So finally, let’s talk about the Be It action items. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your convo with Sandra.

Lesley Logan
We decided to team up on this one.

Brad Crowell
This is really hilarious because she said, “Well, I don’t have just one I’m gonna cheat. It’s also more than three.” I was like, “What?” And she’s like, “It’s six.” I was like, “What?” (Lesley: Yeah) Okay!

Lesley Logan
She definitely is the first to do six and

Brad Crowell
She’s the first

Lesley Logan
And you know, they’re so freakin good.

Brad Crowell
Well, this is genius. Because Okay, she obviously started a company called WORTHY, okay, and, and again, stories, we tell ourselves worthy, you know, her, she took worthy and made it an acronym. So the W stands for why. So reconnecting with your why. The O stands for owning the day. The R is resting, reflecting and rewarding yourself celebrating yourself and…

Lesley Logan
Yeah! And the T is all about tracking. Because how do you know where you’re going? Like, so many people don’t track, you’ve got to track whatever it is. And I promise you, it’s moving the needle forward. H is habit because you are ever like you’re everything you have in the habits. Those are things you do all the time. And we’re big on habits and Sandra and me. Why is all about you, (Brad: You) you understand and believe in yourself and having the tools to help you understand why it’s been challenging for you to achieve your goals in the past and how you must move beyond that. So y’all…

Brad Crowell
I think it’s so crazy. That the way that this this episode is kind of all circled around this, this idea of worthiness. And that actually, I produce the episode, but that wasn’t on purpose. And now I’m reading all the action items thinking Oh, it’s it all. It’s all one story. And so amazing. Because Sandra is a storyteller, that is literally what she does. So Wow, she’s so good at that

Lesley Logan
She’s so good. We’ll have to have her back because I’m not done talking to her. And I really, I instantly light up thinking about her.

Brad Crowell
Well, let’s just quickly run through I think reconnect, you know, keep these short here. But the W reconnecting with your why, helps you build that foundation for you to O, go out and own your day. (Lesley: 100%) Right? And then when you go out and you own your day, you got the R which is the resting, reflecting and rewarding yourself celebrating yourself. So when you’ve reconnected with your why you can go out and own your day, then you can celebrate what you have gone and done. And it’s so important. We are huge fans of celebrating you know (Lesley: I am) mini wins here. It’s a big deal

Lesley Logan
Wins are so important. It’s so important that you, I talk… talk about this in everything we do. But in OPC I’m literally, every single class, talking about celebrate what you did do, do not focus on what you didn’t do, right? Like the more you celebrate you did do the easier it is to show up to hit your mat and do your Pilates practice again, right. And in Agency we have people like if they ever complain, we have a channel that lets them vent. And if they do use it, they have to immediately – not tomorrow, not later in the week when they have one, no – immediately go to the wins. Because here’s the deal, you really do see what you believe to be true. And when you’re in a negative mindset, you just keep seeing bad things happening. So as soon as you look for a WIN, you see other good things happening, and when you celebrate YOU, it really does help you own a day and remind you of your WHY and so those three, super key. Tracking just really quick, anything that you want to do, you should be tracking like where you started and where you’re at and, and, you know, Sandra even said – she’s a Tiny Habits coach, I’ve been studying tiny habits as well because I’m obsessed with how we get things done. And, and the truth is, is that like you have to whatever it is maybe you track it in your calendar, maybe you hand write in a journal, that’s what gratitude journals are for so you can track your gratitude. (Brad: Yeah) Beauty of gratitude, y’all is judgment cannot live in the same space as gratitude. So if you’re feeling super judgy and yourself to start saying things you’re grateful for and it like changes, but anyways, tracking any, anything you track, you will actually expand.

Brad Crowell
It’s one of the things that we bring into our OPC challenges – is tracking. You know, it’s also the reason why we have one class available for seven days because you’re going to be able to measure your progress based on the previous day’s taking class, because it’s the same class that’s literally on purpose. It’s a way to easily mentally track how far you’re winning, how you’re succeeding, again, celebrating. But H, the tracking. It’s funny because when you actually like write it down and you start tracking it and see it in front of you, it does shape your actions and habits because you don’t want to have an empty box on your sheet for Thursday, whatever if you didn’t track what it was you’re doing. So you do it. Right? And that helps you with H your habits. And then lastly, like we kind of were already talking about what with why it’s about you understanding yourself, believing in yourself, knowing that you are enoughness, (Lesley: Yes, you are enoughness!) and you have the tools you know, and having the tools to help you understand why it’s been challenging to achieve your goals. And now move beyond that. So anyway WORTHY, she actually has a full company iamworthy.co so that’s absolutely worth checking out. She’s just awesome. I was it was a really lovely interview to listen to and I’m gonna go back and listen to it again.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, while I listen to him whenever they come out again, I just, I just love it. I learned so much the second, third, fourth time around. So anyways, everyone, I’m Lesley Logan.

Brad Crowell
And I’m Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan
Thank you so much for joining us today. We are so grateful you’re here. How are you going to use these tips in your life I want to know are using the WOR or use the whole WORTHY, tell us, share it and you just screenshot this, tag us on Instagram with, tag Sandra Chuma, her handle is below, and also the be it pod so @be_it_pod with your takeaways and send us a DM if you have questions or anything like that we’d love to hear from you. And also please share this with your friends. That is how this podcast gets out to other people.

Brad Crowell
Bye!

—-

 

Lesley Logan

That’s all I’ve got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast!

One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate this show and leave a review.

And, follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to podcasts.

Also, make sure to introduce yourself over on IG at be_it_pod on Instagram! I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with who ever you think needs to hear it.

Help us help others to BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!

 

Lesley Logan 

‘Be It Till You See It’ is a production of ‘As The Crows Fly Media’.

Brad Crowell

It’s written, produced, filmed and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan

Kevin and Bel at Disenyo handle all of our audio editing and some social media content.

Brad Crowell

Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan

Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can’t see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all the video each week so you can.

Brad Crowell

And to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

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