The Comfort Zone
Is a Beautiful Trap

Ep. 581 with Lesley & Brad

“I think that comfort and fear kind of go hand in hand.”

Brad Crowell

Bio

Shownotes

Lesley and Brad reflect on their conversation with author and podcast host Wendy Valentine, whose story of rebuilding after divorce and debt inspires bold self-discovery. In this recap, they unpack her perspective on authenticity, why growth requires discomfort, and how carving away what isn’t you can reveal your true self. Plus, they connect Wendy’s wisdom to practical ways you can face fear and step into the life you really want.

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co.

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• Why letting go of what doesn’t belong reveals your authentic self.
• How your comfort zones keep you stuck in fear and familiarity.
• Why courage grows only when you take action.
• How to reframe your fear as a signal for possibility.

Episode References/Links:

• P.O.T. Chicago 2025 – https://pilates.com/pilates-on-tour-chicagoland
• Cambodia October 2025 Retreat Waitlist – https://crowsnestretreats.com
• Winter Tour Waitlist – https://opc.me/events
• Pilates Journal Expo – https://www.pilatesjournalexpo.com/los-angeles-pilates-expo
• Contrology Pilates Conference – https://www.korneliamulak.com/contrology-pilates-conference
• Submit your wins or questions – https://beitpod.com/questions
• The Midlife Makeover Show – https://wendyvalentine.com/podcast
• Book: Women Waking Up by Wendy Valentine – https://wendyvalentine.com/womenwakingup
• Ep. 316: Jessica Papineau – https://beitpod.com/jessicapapineau
• Ep. 400: Gay Hendricks – https://beitpod.com/gayhendricks
• Pilates Journal Expo – https://www.pilatesjournalexpo.com/los-angeles-pilates-expo12

Transcript

Lesley Logan 0:00
We all have a little bit of fear when we step outside our comfort zone, but you got to do it if you want to have the life that you want to have. It just doesn’t happen in the way. If it was going to happen in the life you’re having now, you’d have it already.

—-

Lesley Logan
Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I’m Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I’ve trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it’s the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It’s a practice, not a perfect. Let’s get started.

—-

Lesley Logan 0:55
Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap.

Brad Crowell 1:02
I feel caught any of the shit talking that happened before we started. No, you don’t even know. You don’t even know. Take it away.

Lesley Logan 1:12
Brad am I just gonna keep going. I’ll just keep going. Brad and I are going to dig into the refreshingly genuine convo I had with Wendy Valentine in our last episode. If you haven’t yet listened to that interview, feel free to pause this now and go back and listen to that one, then come back and join us. You can listen to it twice if you’re like Brad, maybe remember, just saying, love you so much.

Lesley Logan 1:35
So today is September 25th 2025 and it is One-Hit Wonder Day. One-Hit Wonder Day takes place every year on September 25th.

Brad Crowell 1:48
Yeah, I put that stuff in there just so that you have to repeat literally the same.

Lesley Logan 1:52
Well, sometimes it’s every third Thursday, so it’s not exactly the same but, but the day is the perfect excuse to listen to songs that have been in your head since they first aired. So that doesn’t make sense. If it’s a one-hit wonder, it should just be the day to be honoring other one-hit wonder they flubbed it anyways. I think you should go listen to only one-hit wonders, and I have some good ones for you. So buckle up and get ready to remember all the artists whose names have have been lost to time, but whose works have stayed behind in our minds and hearts. Here’s everything you need to know about one-hit wonders and the people who made them. Brad has a list.

Brad Crowell 2:26
Well, I don’t have a list of everything you need to know about them, but I do have a list of one-hit wonders. So (inaudible) I’m just gonna pick one from each decade.

Lesley Logan 2:35
Okay, that’s fine. But then can I share my favorite one-hit wonder of the 90s?

Brad Crowell 2:38
Okay, when we get to the 90s. All right, so the 1970s, My Sharona.

Lesley Logan 2:46
That was a one hit wonder?

Brad Crowell 2:47
By The Knack. Yeah, ever heard of The Knack?

Lesley Logan 2:50
No, but I heard My Sharona.

Brad Crowell 2:55
Okay, from the 80s, all right, we’ve got, let’s see, this is one of my favorite songs of all times, all time, the times, Take On Me by A-ha.

Lesley Logan 3:12
A-ha. Take On Me.

Brad Crowell 3:14
Take on me.

Lesley Logan 3:15
You don’t love that because it’s you can’t actually, that is hurting people’s ears, (inaudible) but that’s a hard song to sing. It’s kind of like Africa. You can’t like you like, A-ha, because it’s like, Toto like, it’s really hard to sing. Take like, like, he changes.

Brad Crowell 3:32
Yes, he does, yes he does. It’s a very it’s like crazy range. 1990s.

Lesley Logan 3:38
Hey. Well, why don’t you say, well, let’s just see if you picked the one I pick.

Brad Crowell 3:41
All right. Well, so there’s a bunch.

Brad Crowell 3:44
There’s so many. (inaudible)

Lesley Logan 3:45
It also really spans a whole decade, because, like, one of the songs I was like, that was the 90s, I remember being like, in the sixth grade, and the one I picked, I remember, like, knowing in high school. So anyways, clearly, that’s what I did in the 90s, was go to school. What do you got?

Brad Crowell 3:58
All right. All right. So obviously, Tubthumping by Chumbawamba.

Lesley Logan 4:03
Oh, of course, I wouldn’t pick that, but yes, Tubthumping was great. But they’re not really a one-hit wonder because they had another hit.

Brad Crowell 4:09
No, they didn’t.

Lesley Logan 4:10
Oh, they didn’t?

Brad Crowell 4:10
I don’t think they had another hit.

Lesley Logan 4:11
They had another song that, like, made it to my radio in Lodi. It wasn’t as good, you’re right.

Brad Crowell 4:19
I mean, if they did, oh yeah, you know what, I get knocked down.

Lesley Logan 4:25
Yeah, that’s not Tubthumping?

Brad Crowell 4:27
I think it is Tubthumping. How come it’s oh, they released it different titles.

Lesley Logan 4:31
Okay.

Brad Crowell 4:32
No, I think it’s the same. So, yeah, I basically, I think that’s their song.

Lesley Logan 4:35
Okay, all right.

Brad Crowell 4:36
That is the only one that I actually know.

Lesley Logan 4:38
Okay, so okay, how do you how are you going to pick between Sex and Candy and Closing Time?

Brad Crowell 4:43
Oh, Sex and Candy is great.

Lesley Logan 4:45
Because did you even listen to Sex and Candy when you were in the 90s?

Brad Crowell 4:47
No, on the school bus.

Lesley Logan 4:49
Okay.

Brad Crowell 4:49
I love sex and candy. Yeah, so, but, but also, listen like there’s so many others.

Lesley Logan 4:55
Yeah, it’s a lot deeper.

Brad Crowell 4:57
How about Macarena?

Lesley Logan 4:58
Well, no, can’t even start with that one. That’s not good. It’s gonna get in your head.

Brad Crowell 5:02
How about Breakfast at Tiffany’s by Deep Blue Something?

Lesley Logan 5:05
Is Chumbawamba and Tubthumping the same song or different song?

Brad Crowell 5:08
Chumbawamba is the band.

Lesley Logan 5:10
Oh, I see, I see, I see. Okay.

Brad Crowell 5:11
Yeah. How about Semisonic?

Lesley Logan 5:14
Well, yeah, that’s exactly what I was saying. Closing Time. That’s the best song.

Brad Crowell 5:19
It’s a great song.

Lesley Logan 5:20
Did you know? And I think Bitter Sweet Symphony was a one-hit because they, I think they got in trouble with the music.

Brad Crowell 5:25
Oh yeah, yeah.

Lesley Logan 5:26
Which is such a bummer, because it’s such a good song.

Brad Crowell 5:28
Um, okay, 2000s.

Lesley Logan 5:30
Oh yeah, I guess we have to get out of the 90s.

Brad Crowell 5:31
We’re moving on. 2000s, there’s a couple, but I think my famous, my favorite.

Lesley Logan 5:38
Hold on, I have to go back. Save Tonight. That’s another one-hit wonder.

Brad Crowell 5:43
Yeah. Eagle-Eye Cherry, I would never have been able to tell you the name of the band.

Lesley Logan 5:48
Yeah. Okay. Anyways, go ahead. 2000

Brad Crowell 5:49
All right. 2000s.

Lesley Logan 5:50
A great time for fashion.

Brad Crowell 5:52
Yeah. Teenage Dirtbag by Wheatus.

Lesley Logan 5:56
Oh, that. I need.

Brad Crowell 5:57
I’m just a teenage dirtbag baby.

Lesley Logan 6:00
Dirt bag, baby. Oh, my god.

Brad Crowell 6:03
Or Somebody That I Used to Know by Gautier.

Lesley Logan 6:07
Oh, yeah.

Brad Crowell 6:08
You’re just somebody that I used to know. Gnarls Barkley, I don’t know if he’s really a one-hit wonder, because he has a career and but, but he’s also part of another group, all the things.

Lesley Logan 6:20
Is this I Wasn’t Me?

Brad Crowell 6:21
No, crazy.

Lesley Logan 6:23
Oh, okay, but isn’t he the same person who Wasn’t Me?

Brad Crowell 6:26
Wasn’t me. I don’t think so.

Lesley Logan 6:29
Okay, this is exactly what people want to hear. They’re yelling at us in their videos. I want you, if you’re yelling at as right now, tell us who.

Lesley Logan 6:36
2010’s Psy.

Lesley Logan 6:38
Psy.

Brad Crowell 6:39
Yeah. Gangnam Style.

Lesley Logan 6:41
Oh, that. That’s an annoying that’s like the Macarena. It makes me mad.

Brad Crowell 6:45
I think it became like the most watched YouTube video in history, or something like that. I can’t remember. And then here we go. Now we’ve got other notables. Vanessa Carlton, 1000 Miles. Oh, Mighty Mighty Bosstones, The impression I Get, yeah, that’s the 90s. 1000 Miles is 2002. Anyway, if you have a favorite one-hit wonder that we did not cover here, you have to make sure you let us know.

Lesley Logan 7:18
I guess, when do we find out it’s a one-hit wonder? Because, like, is there any one-hit wonders that are recent, you know, or is it like we don’t it doesn’t happen because, like, the labels don’t even make any, you know, risks, take any risks anymore. You know what? I have a one-hit wonder for everyone. It’s not happened yet, but I believe in it. There is a great turkey song that you can all go listen to our dear friend, Geoffro. This is going to be a definite one-hit wonder. He is not a one hit wonder. He is a Grammy Award winning writer, but he has a gobble song that we can all, as a Be It group, make a one-hit wonder, if you go to Spotify right now and listen to this.

Brad Crowell 8:00
Really hilarious turkey song.

Lesley Logan 8:01
Hilarious Thanksgiving song in September.

Brad Crowell 8:06
Geoffro is G-E-O-F-F-R-O. If you’re really curious about this, ping us and I’ll send you a link. So I looked it up at what time after a band is out, do we decide that it’s a one-hit wonder band? There’s no official rule, but there is an understood 10-year rule. The music industry observers often consider an artist a one-hit wonder if they fail to produce another significant chart topping hit within 10 years of their initial success.

Lesley Logan 8:30
10 you’ve 10 years to have another hit. You guys, did you hear that?

Brad Crowell 8:34
Chart-topping. So that’s like getting drafted to the NBA twice.

Lesley Logan 8:39
Okay. Regardless, uh, that means, everyone, you are allowed to have two amazing goals happen in 10 years and still be considered ridiculously amazing. And so don’t like, don’t worry about how long the valley is in between, because you too could have another hit.

Brad Crowell 8:57
Ain’t no valley.

Lesley Logan 8:58
Oh, but that’s not a one-hit wonder. That, in fact, is a wonderful song, which we’re not going to sing right now because we got to move on.

Lesley Logan 9:05
You guys, next week we’re going to be in Chicago, P.O.T. Chicago at Burr Ridge. We’re going to celebrate our 10-year wedding anniversary. I’m gonna teach at Joe gyms, Joe’s gyms. You gotta check it out. I don’t think there’s any spots left, but if, you should always come by.

Brad Crowell 9:19
Yeah, come hang at the booth. Just come say hello, you know.

Lesley Logan 9:22
I should always just check because sometimes people can’t make it and someone’s trying to sell a ticket, so go check it out. Also in October, which is next week. So we’re gonna go to Cambodia. We’re gonna fly from Chicago to Cambodia. Yeah, I’m shipping clothes home. This is not I’m shipping clothes to somewhere, and I don’t even understand the weather that we are doing in this world.

Brad Crowell 9:41
Yeah, maybe I’ll ship clothes home too. That’s not a bad idea.

Lesley Logan 9:44
Yeah because, like, what? What are we going to do with Chicago clothes in Cambodia? Yeah. Also, we kind of just stay indoors the whole time so, but whatever, still gonna send some clothes home. You can go to crowesnestretreats.com to sign up for next year’s Cambodia retreat. There’s an amazing waitlist you can get on.

Brad Crowell 10:03
Yeah, get on the waitlist because in January, we’re going to be making a big announcement about the dates and all the things and doing the early bird, so.

Lesley Logan 10:10
People on the wait list, get the best early bird.

Brad Crowell 10:12
People on the waitlist get the early bird.

Lesley Logan 10:14
And if it sells on the early bird, well, then that’s all. Then we’re going to go to, on our way home from Cambodia, we’re gonna hit Singapore. We have a long layover. We’re going to do a little bit Botanical Garden viewing, but we’re also gonna teach some Pilates there. So I’m super, super excited about that. I don’t even know if you can go, but I’ll be there.

Brad Crowell 10:29
No, it’s a closed event.

Lesley Logan 10:30
It’s closed event. But Brad, so Brad just wants to make sure, you know, we’re gonna be in Singapore.

Brad Crowell 10:33
That’s where we’re gonna be.

Lesley Logan 10:34
And you can’t come.

Brad Crowell 10:35
No, sorry.

Lesley Logan 10:36
Sorry. In December, we’re also going to be on winter tour, and we’re actually announcing that next week. Opc.me/events, October 1st.

Brad Crowell 10:46
October 1st y’all. Get ready.

Lesley Logan 10:47
We have people who are like, when is it announcing? When is it announcing? You better be on opc.me/events, because they’re gonna get a special email, then our list gets email, then it does get posted on the socials. But you know the algorithm, so you’re gonna want to make sure this is gonna be the coolest event, and I want to see you at several locations. I’m just saying, I’m demanding that. So before we get into the amazing.

Lesley Logan 11:08
I mean, this past tour, this past summer tour, we had multiple people at multiple events.

Lesley Logan 11:12
I think I also just want to announce, can I? I’m going to add two more things, because it’s now officially announced, we could talk about it. So January, we’re going to be at the Pilates Expo, so that you want to be the Pilates Journal Expo will be there with a booth, and I’ll be teaching. And then.

Brad Crowell 11:26
Where is that?

Lesley Logan 11:28
It’s in Huntington Beach. But there it says L.A. so it’s L.A. adjacent. It’s in Huntington Beach, (inaudible) in January is stunning, wonderful. And we’re going to be there. The dates, I don’t remember, but they’re, they’re kind of like that right after we’re done with winter tour, we’re like, just going to keep the tour bus, going to be completely honest, and then we are going to go, we’ll be home for a little bit. Then in March, I’m going to be in Poland at the Contrology conference in Poland, with Karen Frischman, and then Karen, Brad and I are going to do a little backpacking around the lovely Europe for a couple days, and we’re going to land in Belgium, and I can officially announce we are teaching in Brussels at Elle’s studio. Pillow Tells, and we’re having a really wonderful conference with Elle’s and Karen and I. So I don’t have a link for that in the moment we’re recording, but I promise you, if you go, if you just Google.

Brad Crowell 12:23
I just want to make a clarification. It’s not the Pilates Expo, it’s the Pilates Journal Expo.

Lesley Logan 12:29
Yeah, I said that.

Brad Crowell 12:30
Okay. Pilates Journal Expo, yeah. So search for the Pilates journal Expo 2026, and you’ll find the one that Lesley is at. They are tickets are open. I think for that now.

Brad Crowell 12:42
Yeah they’re open.

Lesley Logan 12:43
So yeah, definitely check it out. Yep, and then, and then Poland, and then Brussels, so that takes you all the way into end of March. So Europe, it’s not technically a tour, but we got two places, so you better come. You better come I’m telling you, don’t even know what 2027 has in store. Barely can keep up with what’s going on right now. Just saying. So anyways, okay, now, before we get with Wendy, we have to answer one of the wonderful questions that came in.

Lesley Logan 13:13
We sure do. All right, betterdaypilates is asking, hey, I’m not a foot this isn’t a footwork question per se, per se, but footwork related, what are your thoughts on an unpadded foot bar?

Lesley Logan 13:27
Love it.

Brad Crowell 13:28
Betterdaypilates, I can already tell you the answer is, better than a padded foot bar. Why? Feedback. Oh, shoot. Because also safety. Oh, shoot. Brad, jumping in for the win here, okay, you can take over.

Lesley Logan 13:42
Yeah, I think some people would argue that the padded bars are less slippery, so they’ll there’s a, here’s a deal on.

Brad Crowell 13:48
If your feet are like, crusty or slimy, then sure you’re gonna slide, but.

Lesley Logan 13:54
Some people have sweaty palms.

Brad Crowell 13:56
I mean, I guess so. I personally would just have chalk in the studio for that. I think it would make it stickier, though it’s metal.

Brad Crowell 14:02
You would, one would think, but I think it depends on the person. But anyway, I agree with you on all of that, just because you can have a better grip on the foot bar with an unpadded bar, you can feel it. It is. We are. We need to teach grip strength. Grip strength does not come from hanging out in wrist. So I love an unpadded foot bar so when your hands are on, you can actually get your forearms on. I love it on the feet. I know people were.

Brad Crowell 14:25
You were thinking about with your hands. Of course, I was thinking about it with my feet.

Lesley Logan 14:29
Yeah, yeah. So with feet, I love it because you’re right feedback, um, a football, a foot pad, a foot bar. It’s really easy for you not to notice that your foot is pushing harder on one side than the other. Also, those who think it’s gonna be painful. The actual reality is, if you’re doing footwork correctly, unless you have a like, like, a literal foot condition, like some sometimes diabetics, or some people with like, neuropathy, you actually are not feeling the metal on your foot because you’re not pushing from the knee. You’re pushing from the whole center. And so if you’re doing it, if you’re doing footwork correctly, even on four springs, I do not feel pain. And I used to have, like, like, I kind of don’t have any fat on the bottom of my big toe ball of my foot, but it doesn’t, I don’t feel it as painful I thought I would. I truly did. I remember, I remember the studio when they’re like, oh, we’re gonna take the pads off the foot bars. I’m like, I just, I just was like, oh my god. I literally thought to myself, they’re gonna lose all their business. Like, that’s what I thought. I fucking love it. I love it. Take the pad off. I promise you’ll love it. If you have an if you’ve a question and you want to answer to a question, any kind of question, you can go to beitpod.questions and submit your questions, or your win, beitpod.com/question?

Brad Crowell 15:41
Yes.

Lesley Logan 15:41
Yeah, that’s what I said.

Brad Crowell 15:43
Say it again.

Lesley Logan 15:45
BeItPod.com/questions, yes.

Lesley Logan 15:47
Or you can text us at 310-905-5534.

Brad Crowell 15:51
310-905-5534

Lesley Logan 15:56
We still haven’t, see, it’s really easy see, we still haven’t purchased like, 310 be it pod.

Brad Crowell 16:03
We’re not gonna do that.

Lesley Logan 16:05
Why? I think it’s so much more easy to remember. Don’t you remember like, the oh, you know, like 805, called, got junk. Like, yeah. All right, let’s talk about Wendy Valentine.

Brad Crowell 16:19
Stick around. We’ll be right back.

Brad Crowell 16:21
All right. Welcome back. Let’s talk about Wendy Valentine. Wendy is an author and the host of the midlife makeover show, and is often described as a magical beam of light, known for her energy and constant evolving.

Lesley Logan 16:36
Please add something like that to my bio. She’s often talked about as a magical beam of light, I would like it added to my bio.

Brad Crowell 16:44
You’re just a red-headed magical beam of light.

Lesley Logan 16:46
Yeah.

Brad Crowell 16:47
At 45 Wendy overcame divorce, chronic illness and $150,000 of debt, pivoting from unemployment. Pivoting is I hate that word. She figured out a way to get out of unemployment. And then had corporate success, and then she quit her corporate success and to follow her passions, which is pretty (inaudible).

Lesley Logan 17:09
Yeah, she like, got in and out and, like, really, yeah, within a couple of years, I think we hate pivot guys, because we are tired of being the pivoters. Like, we’re so good at pivoting and like, I can’t fucking pivot one more time before I’m turned back the way I started. I’m just gonna say it right now.

Brad Crowell 17:22
Well, Wendy pivoted into authoring Women Waking Up: The Midlife Manifesto for PassionPurpose and Play. She’s providing guidance through her robust framework for individuals seeking to make significant shifts in their lives, especially during pivotal periods like midlife.

Lesley Logan 17:40
That’s a better pivotal.

Brad Crowell 17:41
That’s a better pivotal, that’s a pivotal, that’s a real pivotal.

Lesley Logan 17:45
I don’t know why we just started critiquing a bio. Alright.

Brad Crowell 17:48
It’s a bio we wrote.

Lesley Logan 17:49
Yeah, it’s a bio we wrote.

Brad Crowell 17:51
We wrote it.

Lesley Logan 17:51
So that’s not how we treat our guests. We wrote that one.

Brad Crowell 17:55
Wendy kicks ass and takes names. And it’s amazing. You know, it’s always, it’s always fascinating to me to meet someone who is divorced, because if they’re out and about and they’re putting their their best foot forward, you’re meeting them and you’re like, This person is so cool. How could they have been in a relationship that didn’t go well, right? And.

Brad Crowell 18:21
I agree I understand what you mean, because you.

Brad Crowell 18:22
Do you know what I mean. Like, we meet them and we’re like, wow, I love this person. How did, how did it, how did it all break down and, and I, I want to say that her bio kind of, I feel like her bio is something that we often overlook in that assumption, and that she pivoted. She made major changes from where who she was and where she was and what she wanted and all the things to who she is today. So now that we’re meeting her, she’s had this massive life experience that forced change, forced self- reflection, and she’s come out the other side a magical beam of light.

Lesley Logan 19:05
Yeah, exactly, exactly. And I think, like, you know, especially if you get divorced in your 40s, right? Like she had a kid, like she had a whole life, and, you know, life turned out differently than she expected. And it does when you’re when you’re into your 20s, like, this is how my life’s gonna be. And then you get to your 30s, like, thank fucking god, it didn’t turn out like that. But some people got married in there and so.

Brad Crowell 19:29
Well, I feel like that, like, and the reason that I, I am reflecting on that is because I feel like that happened for me too in in that.

Lesley Logan 19:36
Oh, were you hoping I say how did you get divorced? How could anyone let you go?

Brad Crowell 19:40
Yes, this was really just a long fishing excursion for you to compliment me. You’re lucky to catch me, babe. No, I even it personally, in my own self-love, who I was before, I thought I knew who I was and I felt confident, sort of, but after that experience, then I actually was like, I had spent the better part of a year just working on me, just thinking about me, thinking about my actions, my thoughts, the things that I was doing, and making decisions on those instead of spending like coasting through or floating through or just not really being attuned to any of that stuff, like we often get into these, these grooves, these ruts, and that don’t realize, because you’re forced into this, this period of self-reflection and introspection, I feel like you come out the other side feeling better, you know, hopefully, yeah.

Lesley Logan 20:46
Yeah. I think so. I think also, anytime something literally changes your life, like you’re lit where you wake up, who you wake up with, where you wake up, all that, all that stuff you it has to change you, and if it doesn’t, you get to do it again. That’s how life goes. Here’s I liked. She said she critiques the often big advice, like, be your authentic self. Love her.

Brad Crowell 21:10
Be authentic.

Lesley Logan 21:11
My god, when we first saw this podcast, you remember like we had so many people whose be it action was like, get to know yourself. Be authentic. And I was like, so we’re gonna need to understand, how do you do that?

Brad Crowell 21:22
How?

Lesley Logan 21:23
How do you do that?

Brad Crowell 21:23
How does one get to know themselves?

Lesley Logan 21:26
She said, she clarified, it’s not learning who you are to become. It’s learning who you are not. I love that, because I think a lot of people start with what they want or who they want to be, but you certainly know who you don’t want to be. You certainly know what you don’t like and what you don’t want to be. I think that sometimes it’s easier to start with, like, I don’t want to be that, so I want to be that. Then what changes do I have to make? If I don’t want to be person who who mopes around all the time, well then what are you gonna do? You know? So I really, I really liked that. And she said, oh, she, she, she used an analogy of Michelangelo’s carving, David, where he just, is it Michelangelo or David?

Brad Crowell 22:08
Michelangelo’s carving of David.

Lesley Logan 22:09
Of David. Clearly, I’m not. Hello, guys, my family was a was poor.

Brad Crowell 22:13
Our history 17 over there.

Lesley Logan 22:15
Well, okay, let me just tell you, there was no art history in my schooling. I was a poor girl at public school known art history, and my family doesn’t have art because that’s expensive stuff. So I am not educated. So Michelangelo’s carving of the David, where he just carved everything away that was not him.

Brad Crowell 22:35
Yep.

Lesley Logan 22:36
You don’t like the word of the David.

Brad Crowell 22:37
It’s not the David.

Lesley Logan 22:38
It’s just David.

Lesley Logan 22:39
It’s just David carving dvid, carving of David. Yeah, is this David?

Lesley Logan 22:45
Somebody? Where is it? When the one from the Bible? Is it just a random David?

Brad Crowell 22:49
I’m pretty sure it’s David from the Bible. Let me find out now, because (inaudible).

Lesley Logan 22:52
Like David of David and Goliath,

Brad Crowell 22:55
they say Michelangelo’s David because it’s called the statue is called David. But who is David? Michael and David? No one.

Lesley Logan 23:10
GDavid is, come on chat GPT. Come on right. Be faster. People are waiting.

Lesley Logan 23:18
They’re yelling at us. They already know.

Lesley Logan 23:20
Doesn’t actually say, oh, so we don’t it could be any David.

Brad Crowell 23:22
No, I don’t think so. She was somebody.

Lesley Logan 23:22
Like from Schitt’s Creek. It’s David from Schitt’s Creek.

Brad Crowell 23:22
No, it’s, okay, so, it is from the biblical story of David, the tale of a young shepherd boy who served the Israelites. So David and Goliath. David, pretty sure it’s that David.

Lesley Logan 23:38
Okay, that David, um, I think we like that. David, all right. Anyways, she advised.

Brad Crowell 23:43
Did some good things, did some not so good things.

Lesley Logan 23:45
Right, I’m pretty sure later in life.

Brad Crowell 23:47
He’s human.

Lesley Logan 23:48
Yeah, um, we’re all allowed to be a little human. Uh, she advised, so he caught so Michelangelo essentially carved everything was not him. And I kind of like that, like, you’re just chiseling away at what’s not you. Like, it’s like when you clean out your closet, like, Jessica Papineau’s episode, right? You got to get rid of the clothes that no longer represent who you are.

Brad Crowell 24:07
I love that. And I think that’s, that’s a great comparison. Actually, I love that.

Lesley Logan 24:11
Well, it’s something we can actually apply to ourselves, since none of us are going on carving statues. I mean, maybe three listeners are. But like, I’m certain.

Brad Crowell 24:18
We did end up at a sculptor’s studio here in Vegas. And I was, like, intrigued, because she’s been doing it for something like 50 or so years. And it was like, Wow. What a it’s she made it way more hobby. She turned it into a business.

Lesley Logan 24:31
It’s called Romancing the Stone.

Brad Crowell 24:33
Yes, it is. That’s what it’s called. That’s impressive.

Lesley Logan 24:37
Well, it’s because I, like, thought about the movie, but I was never like, I just remember sitting in that place going, he’s gonna want to take a class here. And I this is a skill set, I can tell you right now don’t have, I don’t have the patience to carve away what’s not this rock. So anyways, she also explained that sometimes we know the things that are not us because we still cling to it for comfort. That’s why people stick around to people that treat ’em like shit or a job they hate, because it’s comfortable. It’s not uncomfortable enough.

Brad Crowell 25:11
Yeah, I think it’s also fear, you know, fear of the unknown. I think that comfort and fear kind of go hand in hand. Believe it or not, you feel comfortable, but you’re actually afraid to make change. Yeah, so you’re unwilling to, like, take a risk?

Lesley Logan 25:26
What is it? Like, the, the the villain you know, or the, what is it? What’s the saying? Like.

Brad Crowell 25:31
The devil you know is a.

Lesley Logan 25:32
The devil you know it’s the devil you know is better than the devil you don’t know. But, like, so negative, because, like, you’re assuming there’s always a double out there. Anyways, there’s a story about a dog that.

Brad Crowell 25:44
Better the devil you know, than the devil you don’t.

Lesley Logan 25:47
Yeah. That’s, you know what that is, you guys, the patriarchy trying to keep you small. That’s what that is. It’s like the penny saved is a penny earned bullshit. All those things are bullshit.

Brad Crowell 25:57
That’s a Malarkey, right there.

Lesley Logan 25:59
Yeah. So, um, but, uh, but I also I just think, like, I go, we can go back to Gay Hendrickson. We all have a little bit of fear when we step outside our comfort zone. But you got to do it if you want to have the life that you want to have. It just doesn’t happen in the way. If it was going to happen in the life you’re having now, you’d have it already, right? Brad Bizjack is going to have an episode coming out really soon in October. Stay tuned. But the other day, he mentioned something like, you know, what got you here won’t take you there.

Brad Crowell 26:28
Yeah, yeah. I think it’s good to clarify that, because if it was going to happen in the life you have right now, meaning, if the thing that you want was going to happen, why wouldn’t have it have already happened today, right? Like, why wouldn’t it have happened to date?

Lesley Logan 26:43
Doing doing the exact same things over and over again, expecting a different result is insanity.

Brad Crowell 26:48
So, I mean, that’s not, that’s yes, but yes, it is not a you have to change in order to get attain, or grow, or any of those things.

Lesley Logan 26:58
If you hate your job, but you never look for another job, the likelihood of a job landing in your lap isn’t going to happen unless you’re telling people, I want a new job.

Brad Crowell 27:07
Yeah, yeah. I mean, and putting that out there allows people to start, you know, responding to you, responding to that, thinking about you. You are constantly thinking about that. You know, it’s you gotta, you gotta take action. Y’all take action.

Lesley Logan 27:27
What do you like?

Brad Crowell 27:27
My favorite thing was, when she was talking about comfort zone, we were just kind of covering it. But the comfort zone, it is a beautiful place, but nothing ever grows there, and I’m not and like, it’s just another way to talk about, like, what we were just saying that I’ve never really thought about, I don’t know, like we have these goals and what’s going to happen, like, we want to get to this place or or build this thing, or have a house, or I don’t buy a car, or whatever it is, like, whatever the goal is, Right? And then when we get it, you know, I think, I think that there’s a time to we can allow ourselves to enjoy the thing, and we should. It’s important to celebrate, right? But that shouldn’t be the end of the story, right? We’re not going to celebrate forever. We’re not going to enjoy it forever. There’s, I think, like there. This is where this idea of balance, like there’s, there’s a, imagine, if you’re, let’s think about about, like a work week. Imagine if the work week, you take the weekend to enjoy the fishing boat that you bought, because you use it, you go out and you use it. But then during the week, you’re doing what you’re moving the ball forward with life with, you know, there’s you’re creating growth. And this idea that the comfort zone is a beautiful place, but nothing ever grows there, you know, unless you’re trying to become a pro fishermen you know, or woman, you’re not going out on the fishing boat to practice. You’re going out in the fishing boat to enjoy. It’s a comfort. It’s a comfort, but, but nothing’s growing there, you know, except maybe your beer belly, right? Because you’re just throwing them back.

Lesley Logan 29:09
It’s an interesting analogy. I can follow it, I think so.

Brad Crowell 29:15
She quoted Marianne Williamson. She said, our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. I don’t know. I’m like, she’s I think she’s an interesting lady, yet she’s very influential. But I think that, I don’t think that people are afraid that they’re powerful. I think that’s a that’s like, that’s an interesting, intriguing thing to say, but I don’t think anybody thinks about themselves being powerful and being afraid of that, unless maybe, if they’re a parent, maybe then they’re like, oh my god, I’m in I have I’m responsible for somebody’s life. There’s power there.

Lesley Logan 29:53
I certainly hope every parent thinks that. I really wonder.

Brad Crowell 29:56
I really hope so. But.

Lesley Logan 29:58
Our listeners, who are parents, do. So I hear you. I don’t, because I don’t go wrong. I’m so powerful. I’m going to, like, I don’t. I often think, like, oh my god, I’m not good enough for this, but I understand the sentiment. And so if we just put a different person’s name on there, I think you probably wouldn’t doubt it so much. Brad is just showing his true colors on Marianne Williamson, I actually think that is I, I actually think I can explain that sentence too. So many people’s goals actually scare them. You don’t think of a goal in life that you want to do. Nothing comes to your mind of something that you desire to do unless you had the power to do it right. And so I think their goals are exciting, and then scare the fuck out of them. And so I think that that’s what the deepest fear is (inaudible) because they’re what they what everybody here believe, like, someday I’m going to be doing X, but then they go, then they have to, like, take the next step, and it’s like, oh, how am I going to do that? You know, like, and so I actually think that that’s where the line is, but.

Brad Crowell 31:03
I just, I just went to a rally where somebody made an announcement that they were going to run for a political office, and and I immediately felt scared for them, of like, oh my god, this is like a really tall order, like, this is a this is a huge this felt intimidating, and it created this fear. And it was really weird, because it was a relatively intimate setting. And she, she jokingly said, Does anybody think I’m crazy? And I raised my hand, and she said, Oh, you have a question? And I said, no, I think you’re crazy to the whole crowd. I said, But crazy in a good way. I said, this. This creates a lot of fear in me, but it’s the kind of fear that makes you want to go do the thing. It’s not like the fear of that, like, incapacitating fear, but it’s that, like, it’s like, if anybody’s ever done skydiving, there’s that moment where you’re leaning out of the plane and you’re like, holy shit, I’m about to do this, right? And, yeah, so, you know, I think, you know, there’s something to that, like, that’s, that’s kind of fear, that is, like, it is motivating, yeah, you know what I mean.

Lesley Logan 32:28
Yeah, I do. I think it’s really great. I think that, like, I really just like what Wendy said, let’s go back to when quoting Wendy, yeah, which is the comfort zone is a beautiful place, but nothing ever grows there. Like, a comfort zone is like laying on your couch every night watching binge watching Netflix, but wishing you had a friend or a partner. Nothing’s growing on that fucking couch. Nothing so you know, what else?

Brad Crowell 32:52
Yeah. Well, that just made me think of your coffee for two things. I thought, I think it’s I just really think it’s cool that you were very intentional about how you were building your life so that you weren’t just sitting on the couch, or weren’t just working yourself to death. You know, in the middle of working hard.

Lesley Logan 33:09
I also saved every Thursday night for a date night. Would not let a fry, would not hang out with a friend if nothing had nothing, no one asked. I just went home on a Thursday night. I saved that night and I saved Christmas for a partner. Look what I got.

Brad Crowell 33:25
That’s right, you’re lucky to have me.

Lesley Logan 33:26
I got a divorcee who would ever let him go.

Brad Crowell 33:32
Wendy said when you get to the other side of that comfort that is more beautiful, and yes, you will then grow. So comfort, I feel like has its place, but it’s also it can be like a sticking point. So, yeah, I think it’s great. I think, you know, there’s a time for it, but there’s also a time to keep moving. Yeah.

Brad Crowell 33:57
Well, stick around. We, by the way, I don’t know if we said this yet, except for the very beginning, but Wendy is a fireball of energy.

Lesley Logan 34:08
Oh, if you haven’t listened, you need to go, she’s like a cold shower in a good way, you know.

Brad Crowell 34:13
Yeah, it’s such a fun conversation.

Lesley Logan 34:16
If you’re having a funky day, you gotta go listen to it. You’ll have an unfunky day.

Brad Crowell 34:20
Yes, love it.

Lesley Logan 34:21
I’m pretty sure that this recap is one of the weirdest you’ve ever listened to, so.

Brad Crowell 34:24
Well, stick around. We’ll be right back, because we’re going to cover those epic Be It Action Items that we got from Wendy, that she made up on the treadmill right before while she’s doing her workout, right before your interview. So we’ll be right back.

Brad Crowell 34:38
All right, so finally, all right, so finally, let’s talk about those Be It Action Items. Say it with me, what bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your convo with Wendy Valentine?

Lesley Logan 34:52
Well, why don’t you start?

Brad Crowell 34:53
Yeah, so she made up her own Be It framework, and she said, B become your own BFF. She really is focused on self-love, I think that was one of the things that she learned after going through her midlife crisis. She said you’ve got to stop that ticker tape of thoughts, the negative thoughts, and replace it with something really good, friendly thoughts. E, envision, envision who you want to become, not just the what, who you want to become, not just the what. Right? I is invite her in, act as if, literally say every single day, act like the woman or person you want to become, right? So invite her in. And then T she said take it.

Lesley Logan 35:37
Take action.

Brad Crowell 35:38
Take it. She asked how do you get courage? By taking action. Leap and then network will appear, right? So I love it. I think that’s a great spin on, you know, bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted.

Lesley Logan 35:51
And she gave more. But also I feel like we should like save this, because this is a great way to describe what being it till you see it is. From the beam of light of Wendy Valentine. She defined it for us. She also said she heard Deepak Deepak Chopra say, feel your way through life. Feel your way through life. And so she advised, no matter what we were doing, to ask ourselves, how does it feel, and more importantly, how does it feel to who you are becoming and the life you’re creating? Does it does it lie? Does it align? That’s, that’s not a one-hit wonder, but it’s a great song. She also said stop overthinking. Just feel your way through life. I, actually, I know that can scare people, because they’re like, I they’re like, holding a tight grip on life, because, if they like, let go, chaos is gonna happen. It’s gonna fucking happen anyways. That’s life. I tell you right now, on one of these days, we’ll tell you about how hot the house got and how we had to move a workshop.

Brad Crowell 36:48
Oh that was so fun.

Lesley Logan 36:49
You know, like, it doesn’t matter how planned out your life is, how well you thought about all the things, how many reminders you sent things, the AC can still blow because it’s not like it has a warning symbol. So I’m just telling you all, explode. So stop overthinking and feel your way through. Because I promise you, if you can take that like, just feel your way through and then your tight grip on reality, I think you’re gonna land right there in the middle. So.

Brad Crowell 37:16
It’s a win.

Lesley Logan 37:17
I’m Lesley Logan.

Brad Crowell 37:18
And I’m Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan 37:19
Thank you so much for listening to our amazing episode, I have to say, let us know if you like how the wheels fell off today, and if you think it was great, or if you want us to go back to how we’ve done it before. Until next time, Be It Till You See It.

Brad Crowell 37:33
Bye for now.

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Lesley Logan
That’s all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others to BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!

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Lesley Logan
‘Be It Till You See It’ is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @be_it_pod.

Brad Crowell
It’s written, filmed and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan
It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.

Brad Crowell
Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music and our branding by designer and artist Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan
Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.

Brad Crowell
Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.

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