Some of You Are Already
Living Your Purpose
Ep. 698 with Lesley & Brad
“If you can keep your “why” in mind, it can keep the perfection from taking over.“
Lesley Logan
Bio
Click to read more about:     Lesley Logan    Brad Crowell
Shownotes
In this recap, Lesley Logan and Brad Crowell unpack the deeper implications of Adrian Starks’ conversation on purpose, grief, and the resistance that comes from fighting your own path. They explore how purpose isn’t something you find, but something you actively build, and why the attempt to force alignment often backfires. The episode tackles the unglamorous realities of change, self-reflection, and what happens when perfection gets in the way of progress. Whether you’re struggling with imposter syndrome or questioning your direction, this conversation invites you to reclaim agency over your own story.
If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected].
And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.
In this episode you will learn about:
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How supporting LGBTQ+ communities strengthens your own alignment and values.
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The importance of taking control of your purpose before it gets defined for you.
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Why the more effort you put into controlling something, the more it slips through your fingers.
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How self-reflection reveals when you’re outgrowing something or being called into something new
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Imposter syndrome shows up when you’re going against the grain of your purpose.
Episode References/Links:
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OPC for 40 days for $40 – opc.me/40
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eLevate 2028 Waitlist – lesleylogan.co/elevate
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OPC Flashcards – opc.me/flashcards
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Summer Tour (Powered by Balanced Body) – opc.me/tour
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Prism Foundation – arprismfoundation.org
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Adrian Starks Website – https://adrianstarks.com
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Ep 191. with Adrian Starks – https://beitpod.com/ep191
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100 Acts of Love by Kim Hamer – https://a.co/d/0dugkBGk
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Ep 244 with Kim Hamer – https://beitpod.com/ep244
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Ep 235 with Krista St-Germain – https://beitpod.com/ep235
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Ep. 688 Outgrowing Series 1 – https://beitpod.com/ep688
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Ep. 689 Outgrowing Series 2 – https://beitpod.com/ep689
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Submit your wins or questions – https://beitpod.com/questions
Transcript
Brad Crowell 0:00
We think purpose is just going to find us, and we’re gonna be like, “Oh my god, that’s what I’m here for, that’s the thing,” right? Instead, what clearly seems actionable is purpose is something that we are out there doing, and whether or not we chose to do it, we’re still out there doing it.
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Lesley Logan 0:21
Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I’m Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I’ve trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it’s the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It’s a practice, not a perfect. Let’s get started.
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Lesley Logan 1:04
Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap, where my co-host in life, Brad, and I are going to dig into the purposeful convo I had with Adrian Starks in our last episode. You know what, I think that’s what we said the first time he was on, because his podcast is all about being purposeful, so if you haven’t yet listened to that interview, you can pause this and go listen to that one.
Brad Crowell 1:23
What is he like? 190-something?
Lesley Logan 1:26
It was like 151. Brad’s gonna look it up and… and you can then come back and listen to this one, or you can listen to this one, because we chat about a bunch of stuff, and then our favorite things. And then you can go listen to the amazing one, because you have all the choice in this world. You get to do what you want to do, and we got to meet a bunch of you amazing podcast listeners when we were in Arizona the other day.
Brad Crowell 1:46
It was 191.
Lesley Logan 1:47
191
Brad Crowell 1:48
Yes, I can’t believe.
Lesley Logan 1:50
Wow, nailed it.
Brad Crowell 1:51
I did.
Lesley Logan 1:52
I don’t even know. You must have cheated. You must have seen it.
Brad Crowell 1:55
I heard it in the episode.
Lesley Logan 1:56
You heard it in the episode.
Brad Crowell 1:59
Because I went back and listened to it.
Lesley Logan 2:00
I was like I love you, but there’s no way you came up with that on your own. Anyways, we met a bunch of listeners at the POT Arizona last month.
Brad Crowell 2:10
We sure did.
Lesley Logan 2:11
I love that you love the pod, and also I heard that people are loving the solo episodes. If that’s the case, please leave a review and tell me what you want me to talk about. Also, another way you can support this show is to become an OPC member, because when you’re an OPC member, that money also supports this podcast. Just be honest, so the best thing you can do is to go be a member of OPC. One, you actually get extra stuff out of it. If you like these little pep talks that I do on the podcast that are solo, at the end of every one of my classes, I give you a little pep talk. It’s not a mantra, but it’s something close. So you can go to opc.me/40, and then you can join OPC for 40 days for $40, and then you can see how great we are. Okay, today is June 25, 2026. It’s Bourdain Day.
Brad Crowell 3:00
It’s Bourdain Day, and this is.
Lesley Logan 3:02
A quote from Mr. Anthony Bourdain: “If I’m an advocate for anything, it’s to move as far as you can, as much as you can, across the ocean or simply across the river, walk in someone else’s shoes, or at least eat their food. It’s a plus for everybody.” Anthony Bourdain backed up his words with action, all the while urging us to do a lot more than simply try new foods in exotic places with fascinating strangers. He desperately wanted us to break out of our comfort zones and see the world in person through the eyes of people we would never otherwise meet. Watching his TV shows, first No Reservations, and then Parts Unknown, enabled us to spend time with the real-life explorer who trotted around the world in search of, well, the things that make us all human: food, yes, but also love, spirit, and passion. Bourdain, who suffered from depression, took his own life in 2018 at the age of 61. “Anthony was my best friend,” tweeted French chef and close friend Eric Ripert at the time. “Exceptional human being, so inspired and generous.” Ripert, along with another longtime friend, José Andrés, who does some amazing work in this world, declared June 25, Bourdain’s birthday, Bourdain Day in 2019. So, if you are thinking of suicide, or worried about a friend, or in need of emotional support, the Lifeline Network is available 24/7 across the US. Call 800-273-8255. I think there’s also a short number, I feel like there’s a short number that you can call, but we had a dear friend.
Brad Crowell 4:20
You can call 988 in the United States.
Lesley Logan 4:22
Thank you. Yeah, yeah, who worked with a suicide prevention network in Nevada. And life’s really hard right now. It’s harder than people think. You look at people and they seem to have it all together, and they don’t. A lot of people are tired, a lot of people have a lot going on. So reach out to a friend you haven’t heard from or talked to in a while. You just never know. You might help them out, but also make sure you have these numbers, because there are people who are experts who can also support.
Brad Crowell 4:49
Yeah.
Lesley Logan 4:50
Upcoming travel, Brad, predict this, because what, go ahead, Brad.
Brad Crowell 4:54
Yeah, Anthony Bourdain was very inspirational for me. He was living the travel bug that I always had, and when I was in college, my friend and I used to watch his show every single week, No Reservations. I just loved that he was so angry at his producers in that show, and he would get so pissed about cursing and smoking cigarettes on TV. I guess it wasn’t live, but on TV, and then.
Lesley Logan 5:23
They could just edit it out.
Brad Crowell 5:24
hey could have edited it out, but they didn’t. Yeah, it just was really inspirational for me. And then he did some amazing stuff too. He was in Beirut when that.
Lesley Logan 5:36
Yes! And then also, don’t forget his wonderful documentary about food waste.
Brad Crowell 5:40
Yeah, food waste.
Lesley Logan 5:41
If you haven’t seen it, you must see it.
Brad Crowell 5:43
It’s called Wasted!
Lesley Logan 5:44
I think it’s called Wasted!
Brad Crowell 5:45
Yeah.
Lesley Logan 5:45
We actually watched it, and the next day he died by suicide.
Brad Crowell 5:48
Yeah.
Lesley Logan 5:49
That was really tragic, and that documentary stuck with me. So it’s really, really important, because we all need to be aware. In certain countries, they’re doing a much better job about food waste than we are. Go Japan! You were commenting from the documentary, so yeah, for me.
Brad Crowell 6:03
It was amazing because I never was a chef, but he worked in the food industry, I worked in the food industry, and I got his book Kitchen Confidential when I was in my early 20s. I just thought he was amazing. So, yep, in honor of Anthony Bourdain, and as Lesley was mentioning, if you or anyone you know is suffering with suicidal thoughts, there is support out there for you.
Lesley Logan 6:28
Yeah.
Brad Crowell 6:29
Yeah.
Lesley Logan 6:29
In other news, there are no spots left in Elevate. Every single week in the last few weeks that you’ve heard that there are spots was a lie.
Brad Crowell 6:37
They are sold out.
Lesley Logan 6:40
For 2027 anyways. We are already taking applications for 2028. We’ll be able to let you snag your spot and reserve it, and all that stuff. But we’re going to have a wonderful Q&A call this summer on July 9, I believe it’s at 1 PM Pacific time. You can go to lesleylogan.co/elevate to get on the waitlist. We’ll have that call information, and you can register for the call. Oh, I should do ll.co/waitlist. Actually, sorry, my producer is doing this in real time, everyone. Anyways, what I want you to do is get on that waitlist, because I do update you monthly on when we have dates and when we’re accepting applications, and when you can deposit. I know that 2028 will fill up as soon as we open up those applications, but that means you have a whole year-plus to protect those dates like your life once I figure out what they are.
Lesley Logan 7:31
summer tour is coming, but the tickets are available. They’ve been available for a few weeks, actually a month to be precise, and many cities are sold out. You’re like, “Lesley, now that I know you record this in the past-future, how do you know?” Because I do! When we were in Arizona, we actually met many people who were like, “Oh, I’m going to Tucson,” and I was like, “Okay, we’re probably out of spots in Tucson.” So I know that some of these slots are sold out. You want to go to opc.me/tour. Our tours are sponsored by the wonderful Balanced Body and Contrology company. Balanced Body is celebrating 50 years, so it’s a really big year for them. It’s kind of amazing what they’re doing, and it’s really special. So I want you to make sure that you join us, because Balanced Body allows our tours to go to more than six places and to do it with a lot of fun. We’re bringing Contrology products into the studio so you can try them out. And if you’re new here…
Brad Crowell 8:25
Welcome.
Lesley Logan 8:25
Hi! We also have Pilates flashcards. Did you know that we do? You don’t have to be a Pilates instructor to love them. They’re actually really wonderful for helping you have access to great Pilates where you are. They’re so great, in fact, that people steal my images all the fucking time to put them in their shitty books, but you can get the real thing with the best information that has been edited many times and has quality videos at opc.me/flashcards. Sorry, I’m a little pissed off over here about something, but I am. If you follow me on Instagram, you know how long this has been going on, and just as we were about to hit record, I found out another fucking person is stealing my images from my flashcards.
Brad Crowell 9:08
Three more people.
Lesley Logan 9:09
Three more people.
Brad Crowell 9:10
Yeah, so it’s a thing. That’s crazy. Anyway, you should know what’s crazy.
Lesley Logan 9:16
Is that they thought someone wouldn’t find out? You know what I mean?
Brad Crowell 9:21
I mean, maybe they just don’t care.
Lesley Logan 9:22
Maybe they don’t care, or they’re like, “Oh, she only has like 30,000 followers, so no one will know.” But my followers know me, and even people who don’t follow me are telling me, because I am recognizable at any rate. But you can get my flashcards, the real deal, and support a small business who is going to take on some of these big-ass companies, because there is a company that is a big name that we’re about to take down anyways. I’m excited about it.
Lesley Logan 9:49
Before we get into… we used to do audience questions here. If you’re new, you don’t know that, so this is not a new thing for you. But if you’re old and you’re like, “Oh, I just popped in here on this one,” we don’t do that anymore. We answer questions on YouTube at 9 AM Pacific Time Live, and that is where I answer them. If you’re a member, I answer questions wherever you are a member, so as long as it’s part of your membership, right? If you’re an agency member, you can ask business questions there. If you are an OPC member, I answer personal Pilates questions there—I answer all those. Plus, there’s YouTube, and YouTube is free. People don’t know that, but it is. It’s free. You have to watch, according to one comment, a diabolical amount of commercials, but it’s free. Yes, “diabolical” was the word that was used. However, what we decided to change this to is many of you want to help out people in your life, but often don’t know how to help, and there are so many different shitstorms in the world, like, which firestorm do you help with? The reality is that you can help either by just sharing with a friend who needs to hear that this charity exists for them, or you can share your time, or you can share it on your platform, or you can give them money, even $2.
Lesley Logan 10:55
So, because June is Pride Month, we are going to wrap up the month’s theme with another wonderful LGBTQ+ charity. This is the Prism Foundation, and it was founded in 2021. The Prism Foundation was started to organize and execute initiatives for the LGBTQ+ community in the state of Arkansas, using a multifaceted approach to achieve the following outcomes: increase access to affirming and comprehensive healthcare, align resources that address barriers to care and health disparities among the community, and create safe spaces for both virtual and physical activities and services that serve LGBTQ+ Arkansas.
Brad Crowell 11:32
Correct me if we’re wrong here, but I think it’s Arkansans.
Lesley Logan 11:35
What is also exciting, because I was doing some research on them, they are also really aware of what is happening in the states that are surrounding them that are affecting trans people. Part of their vision is: “We are increasing access to healthcare as top of our priorities. We’re also focused on creating pathways to fulfill our basic needs, including overcoming barriers to legal aid services and developing supportive community spaces physically and virtually.”
Lesley Logan 11:59
I think this is really important because unfortunately, and at the time of this recording, there have been some awful things that have been said about trans people from the government that we are under in this country. I won’t even repeat his words, because they are too horrible to repeat, that he said this week. But we need to be protecting our people who are different than us, because the fucking people who are taking from you are billionaires. So support the LGBTQ+ people in your area, because one, they are beautiful human beings, and two, they are always there supporting.
Brad Crowell 12:39
That’s true, there’s very much of an activism mentality in that community.
Lesley Logan 12:45
Yeah.
Brad Crowell 12:45
Really like.
Lesley Logan 12:46
And also, my goodness, they have to be tired. I’m sure they are. Anyways, I really like what that Prism organization is doing. I think it has to be hard to do what they do in the areas that they’re doing it, so if you want to support, there you go.
Brad Crowell 13:05
You can go to their website at arprismfoundation.org to read more about what they are doing and how you could support them.
Lesley Logan 13:14
And if that is not your area, because you’re like, “I’m not Arkansan,” or “I’m not in the Midwest,” then look up ones in your area that are doing something locally for you, because there is always a local outlet of something, like we’ve talked about before on this podcast. We love supporting a restaurant because Bronze Cafe—everyone who’s local to Las Vegas who listens to this show, when you buy meals from them, they support the LGBTQ mental health community center here.
Brad Crowell 13:38
If you have an organization that is doing good things that we should find out about, and you want to be featured on the pod, call us and leave us a voicemail.
Lesley Logan 13:49
I love that. Then it’s your favorite charity.
Brad Crowell 13:52
At 310-905-5534 and tell us why they’re amazing. You can also submit wins, by the way, at beitpod.com/questions so that we can get you in on the Friday episode.
Lesley Logan 14:09
Times now, Brad, I have had people tell me that they heard their win months after they submitted it, and it really made their day because they were having a rough day. So I tell people this. Also, just so you know, we’ve changed the Friday FYF. I bitch about something, and then you were gonna come, but we haven’t had a chance for you to bitch about something.
Brad Crowell 14:30
Oh, yes.
Lesley Logan 14:31
Which is what we do at our other communities, and then I celebrate a win, and then I share their wins. That’s cool, and I do a mantra, so we had a change to it because it’s quite nice. Maybe my new “need a moment” is that all these people use my fucking image.
Brad Crowell 14:46
Well, we’ll save that for Friday’s episode. Stick around, we’ll be right back.
Brad Crowell 14:51
All right, now let’s talk about Mr. Adrian Starks. Adrian is a professional speaker, voice narrator, and host of the Your Purposeful Life podcast, who openly embraces his authentic, unpolished self, including his fun side as a comic card and superhero fanatic. Having shed the rigid suit-and-tie expectations of his early career, Adrian is deeply protective of the energy he puts into the world, intentionally choosing to step away from the microphone rather than record an episode if he’s having a bad day. So, good vibes, right? As a fellow human seeking purpose, he helps his audience navigate what he identifies as the three continuous cycles of purposeful living, and encourages people to make a mess, figure out what works, and ultimately have fun with their journey.
Lesley Logan 15:36
Well, we love mess over here. We love messy action, and we’re so big on that. Yeah, I also love… I mean, we had a great conversation about evolution, but one of the things we talked about is he said when we try to make things perfect when they’re not meant to be—well, nothing’s supposed to be—there’s going to be major resistance because everything has to flow a certain way. He used the metaphor of salmon noting their journey upstream against the flow of the river is what ultimately exhausts them, and I think that’s so true. I think we try to get things to be so perfect, just like, you know, we make it too precious, and you kind of hold on to it too tight. Then you aren’t able to hear amazing things or be curious to go a different direction, you know what I mean?
Brad Crowell 16:19
I was just talking about the idea of, like, the more effort you put into controlling something, the more it slips through your fingers. And yeah, I mean, I totally get that. Here’s how I equate this. This is going to be an amazing parallel for all you ultimate frisbee players out there, of which I know I’m speaking to the right audience. Obviously.
Lesley Logan 16:40
I’m sure we have a good two.
Brad Crowell 16:42
Clearly, clearly the right audience. I grew up playing very, very competitively, playing ultimate frisbee, and whenever you were gonna throw the frisbee all the way down the field—the disc, as it were, if you put all of your might into that throw, that huck, as it were, is what we would call it, inevitably, you would mess it up. It would curve to the right, or go out of bounds, or whatever. But if you took a half a second before that huge throw, and you just eased and paused when you threw, you paused, and then just let it happen—it would go where you wanted it to every time. It took a long time, and I could always tell as soon as I released the disc, like, “Oh man, I did not do that right.” I feel like life is like that too. When you are forcing it, things do not go the way that you want them to, but when you go with the flow, you know, while you’re directing it, then things seem to happen a lot more organically, usually. All the things, right?
Lesley Logan 17:49
Yeah, it’s like a tough balance, right, because.
Brad Crowell 17:52
Still have to direct it.
Lesley Logan 17:53
Well, because you don’t want to just be blowing with the wind, but you also need to feel the flow, right? Like, there are some obstacles that tell us, like, “Not that door,” right? That doesn’t mean it’s a stop sign, it’s just like a doorway, like, “Nope, not that door.” And I think it’s like really understanding, you know, why are you doing this? Why are you doing any of this? Because if you can keep your “why” in mind, it can keep the perfection from taking over, because perfection will honestly end up making something so clean and perfect, no one wants to touch it and do it, or they don’t really know what it is, and it’s exhausting. It’s exhausting to be perfect.
Lesley Logan 18:30
Oh my god, there’s just certain people in my life, whenever I see them, I’m like, “How long does it take them to get out the door?” Because we just saw someone this past weekend at an event, and every time I see her, I’m like, she’s so perfectly coiffed, it must take forever to get out the door, because there’s not a hair amiss. The outfit is… the nails match the shoes match the… I mean, like all of it. I’m like, I know how long it takes to get my nails done, so they’re just gonna be what they are for four weeks. So, I don’t know, I’m just saying this is… if you want to be my friend, don’t be perfect, okay?
Lesley Logan 19:06
The last thing I’ll say is he explained that when we go against the grain of what our purposes are, it creates major resistance that makes us feel like we’re not worthy. So, hello, my people who feel imposter syndrome, it’s because you’re going against the grain of your purpose. If we’re truly good at where we are, while we always can improve, we don’t need to be perfect. There is this thing… “improve” is the wrong word. We are always… this is something that happens with Pilates instructors that I meet. You always are going to be learning. There’s never a point that you’re not learning, but there’s a difference between chasing down every single person to go through their version of a program with, and also just learning from the body in front of you today. You know what I mean? Every time I teach a new person, a new client, I learn a new way of explaining something. Today we were doing OPC spring training, and this wonderful person asked a great question. I was like, “You know what, I’ve explained this before, but never to a person with that brand of equipment, with that years of experience, with that understanding of the exercise.” So even I am learning something I already know in a different way so I can explain it. It’s just… there’s ways to learn and improve yourself without having to constantly feel like you’ve gotta sign up for this next thing, you know? So, anyways.
Brad Crowell 20:21
Stay tuned, because how do we know what our purpose is, you know? How do we even know if we’re going against the grain? Stick around, because we’re going to talk about that in the Be It action items.
Brad Crowell 20:32
But what I really wanted to talk about myself was grief, which is interesting because it was an interesting topic that y’all skipped over. You were talking about grieving, not just like a person who might no longer be with us, or obviously a pet or any of that, but even an experience that was supposed to happen, but it didn’t, you know? And you were very excited about it, or you had a lot of effort and planning into it. I mean, we know we’ve been talking about opening a studio for a really long time, and we spent a lot of money, we spent a lot of time at the beginning of this year and last year—beginning of this year like really thinking, planning. I mean, I can’t even tell you how many phone calls I made to the city, and I spent hours putting together a plan, a business plan for this. And then three months in, we decided to pause the whole thing because we realized that we were pretty much forcing it, you know, because there was one key thing that was holding us up that was like, “Wait a minute, how are we going to solve this problem?” It was kind of like one of those, “Well, we’re gonna… we could… we’ll make it work. We’ll figure it out. It’s gonna…” you know. All of a sudden I was like, “Why do we need to do that? We don’t even need to do the studio. It’s just gonna cause a lot of stress. And what we could be doing right now is opening a major problem for ourselves.” So what we decided to do instead was solve the problem that we would be opening for ourselves first, but that’s going to take time.
Lesley Logan 22:01
Yeah.
Brad Crowell 22:02
Right. So even though we spent this time putting this whole plan together and decided to hit pause, it’s interesting because, okay, there’s actually another path that is going to set us up for success in the future when we do bring that studio back around. However, it doesn’t mean that you don’t feel bummed about it. I drive by the location that we picked out, that I’ve talked with the landlord.
Lesley Logan 22:26
I know.
Brad Crowell 22:27
And the neighbors, and the city about, and a contractor about.
Lesley Logan 22:30
And I envisioned the sign.
Brad Crowell 22:32
100 times.
Lesley Logan 22:33
I still don’t think it’s not going to be in that center. I just think it’s not that unit. It’s just that unit needed way too much money. Yeah, not the rent, but the build-out was like jaw-dropping. It honestly made the grief a little bit easier, I’m not gonna lie, because it was such a “fuck no,” you know what I mean? Like, it was just like no fucking way. And so, I do understand there’s grief because that’s not happening today, and so we still drive by it every single time, but I also think this is where good reflection comes from, too. It’s like, in reflecting, it’s all out of our control—the parts that are the obstacles, yeah. So I go to bed knowing we did the best we could with what we had in the moment, and had we not had this other stupid bill come through that we’re like, “That’s a fuck no,” we probably would have forced the salmon up the stream a little bit. I think so, because we definitely.
Brad Crowell 23:34
Would have.
Lesley Logan 23:34
Anyway, would have made it work, but it would have been a hard stress.
Brad Crowell 23:38
More complicated than it needed to be. Yeah, but.
Lesley Logan 23:40
I do think there is a way you have to grieve changes. We have Elevate members who are like, “I’m grieving the teacher I used to be,” because they used to just narrate a Pilates class, for lack of a simple thing. And it’s like, “Well, no, now you get to watch it, and you get to see what it is.” Part of you is excited because you know better now and you have these more potential possibilities now, but also there was a time that it felt easier, right? And you’re a different person when you’re in this unknown space. So, like, I’m excited when we open that studio. I’m past the grief thing, but also sometimes I look back at that studio, it would have been really great if it was a Pilates on it already.
Brad Crowell 24:19
Yeah, well, that’s the thing. You know, you were talking about how grief doesn’t really go away because you had built a mental pattern around a person or a thing or an experience that was supposed to happen. You had built that into your thinking, and what ends up happening over time is we think that way a little bit less. It doesn’t mean we don’t think about the thing, but the expectations that we had alter, they shift, right? And so, you know, what Adrian was talking about was someone, I think he was talking about someone who died, if I recall, and he said sometimes he just needs to embrace when that emotion comes up. He embraces it, he leans into it. He’s like, “It’s okay for me to feel this right now,” and he encourages letting that emotion flow for multiple reasons. It’s a testament to how someone or something impacted you, but also it’s really important to feel those emotions. So.
Lesley Logan 25:16
Yeah, it’s hard. I don’t know, it’s like there’s certain… you know, it’s really interesting, like there’s certain people, places, or things that you grieve in different ways. Our LA studio, I don’t ever look back and have tears, like I’m sad with that studio, because it was the right thing to do to make the change, but I do miss having that cute little space.
Brad Crowell 25:37
Yeah.
Lesley Logan 25:37
You know, I miss it. Yeah, I think back of it fondly, not tears, like, “Oh, I don’t have that place anymore,” but like, “What a fun two years I had in that space.” It was such a… like a treehouse, you know. So, grief doesn’t always have to be devastating either, but you have to feel it. We have some great grief podcasts, by the way. Haven’t had any recently, but the two that we had were so good: Kim Hamer and another woman… I want to say Kara, but I don’t think that’s what it was. She’s like Coach Something, and they’re both on grief. Kim Hamer has a wonderful book on 100 Acts of Love, and her episode about her husband and that grief was so interesting, and what she has done. She was so raw and wonderful and thoughtful. And then there was a woman before her in the episodes, and I’m just talking like as if it’s going to come back to me, she actually, unfortunately, watched her husband die, and then she went through all this grief and she was like, “How come this is happening, and why am I not over it?” She literally became a grief coach.
Brad Crowell 26:42
Yeah.
Lesley Logan 26:42
I want to say it’s Kara, but it’s not.
Brad Crowell 26:44
I have no idea.
Lesley Logan 26:46
Anyways, our wonderful producers will figure it out, I’m sure. But you can just go into our catalog; it’s definitely in the first 200 episodes. Good luck! Well, here’s the thing: if you can find Kim Hamer, it’s within two months of Kim Hamer that I remember. So, okay, we’re gonna get into our Be It action items, and I can see Brad is going to Google that.
Brad Crowell 27:05
Yeah, one was Krista St-Germain.
Lesley Logan 27:08
That’s the one.
Brad Crowell 27:09
And the other was.
Lesley Logan 27:12
Kim Hamer. Kim Hamer! So sorry, replace Hamer everywhere I said Scott. There you go.
Brad Crowell 27:23
All right, stick around. We’ll be right back. We’re gonna dig into those Be It action items.
Brad Crowell 27:29
All right. Well, welcome back. Let’s talk about those Be It action items that we got from Adrian Starks. What bold, executable, intrinsic, or targeted action items can we take away from your combo, Adrian? It’s weird to call him Starks. Starks, it sounds like he’s like… like.
Lesley Logan 27:48
Tony.
Brad Crowell 27:49
Yeah, but I was thinking like a football player, like the way that you.
Lesley Logan 27:52
I just want to go “Adrian,” that’s all.
Brad Crowell 27:54
Starks redefines the word goal, and I’ve really loved this, y’all. He’s so full of these quippy things that are so applicable, and this one really blew my mind. He said, “I love a goal, but I redefined it with the acronym of Get Out and Live, Get Out and Live.” And I was like, “Wow, that’s really great.” I love that he views goals not as rigid markers but as triggers to move outside of one’s comfort zone, scare yourself a little bit, and then break a rut. He suggests regularly asking yourself, what is actually going on here? What am I not happy about? What do I actually want? Specifically focusing on immediate desires rather than five-year plans, he recommends detoxing from social media for several days at a time to avoid the world of comparisons that definitely leads to self-doubt and imposter syndrome.
Brad Crowell 28:51
Imposter syndrome, yeah, exactly.
Lesley Logan 28:53
Comparison is the thief of joy.
Brad Crowell 28:54
Comparison is the thief of joy. What about you?
Lesley Logan 28:58
Well, he said your purpose in life is not something you find, it’s something that you do, and it’s going to change. It’s going to evolve with time, and I couldn’t agree more. It’s so funny. Recently, I posted pictures of myself as a brand new Pilates instructor. I actually wrote a whole series called Outgrowing Yourself, and it’s either already come out or it’s coming up. No idea. I think it already came out, outgrowing your old version of yourself. And it’s so funny, because I don’t look back at her going, “Oh my god.” I mean, when I said, “Oh my god, I look so young…”
Brad Crowell 29:27
You look like a child.
Lesley Logan 29:28
I look like a child. I was 25, but I think about what her goals as a new teacher were to where I am right now, and I can say looking back I never have thought, “Oh my god, I’m no longer living my purpose,” because my purpose has evolved as a teacher. Because I’ve evolved in the more that I know, and the people that I teach, and the things that I’m drawn to. There’s things that people like, “Don’t you want to do this?” and it’s like, “No, that’s a no, I don’t.” And even right now people like, “Oh, what about next year?” I’m like, “I think I’m staying home a lot, actually a significant amount of time. I’m staying home.” And they’re like, “Oh, really?” And it’s like, “Yeah, because if you do take the time to get to know yourself, and you do stay aligned with what you want, and you do stay aligned with your purpose, your life has to evolve.” And then, because that evolves, and your purpose evolves, I’m like, “My life has to reflect what I’m doing, and then what I’m doing then takes me to my next thing, which means my life has to reflect what I’m doing, and so…”
Brad Crowell 30:26
I agree with you on this, but also let’s go back to his statement, because I think I remember trying to figure out, like, what am I going to do with my life, or what’s my purpose? And we all know that it’s important to have purpose in our lives, but I also think a testament to this is the conversations that I’ve had recently with my parents, who just retired.
Lesley Logan 30:51
Yeah.
Brad Crowell 30:51
Right. And then the interview that we had with the retirement coach, whose name I’m not recalling, but it was in the last 100 episodes.
Lesley Logan 31:01
Definitely. It was definitely, was it this year?
Brad Crowell 31:04
But the point is that we think purpose is just going to find us, and we’re gonna be like, “Oh my god, that’s what I’m here for, that’s the thing,” right? Instead, what clearly seems actionable is purpose is something that we are out there doing, and whether or not we chose to do it, we’re still out there doing it. I mean, I think about my parents with their job, and the thing that was keeping my dad focused on the job was the job. Ultimately, if you step back and look at that, it’s not necessarily like whatever… I don’t even know what the projects were that he was working on.
Lesley Logan 31:45
Ever.
Brad Crowell 31:46
Yeah, but the point… I mean, I wasn’t intimately involved in the company they work for, so I don’t actually understand all the nuance of the things, but he built that purpose over a career of 42 or 43 years, and then now all of a sudden he’s thinking about ending it. It doesn’t matter how mundane the job is, he’s, “Oh, what am I going to do with myself after this? I’m not sure, I don’t know,” you know. And so that’s where we find ourselves unwilling to make a change as well, but then you have… that’s like.
Lesley Logan 32:16
No, I want to argue with you a little bit, and I’m glad your dad doesn’t listen to this podcast. I feel like he did what a lot of people his age did, which is like, “This is my job,” and that job became the purpose. Yeah.
Brad Crowell 32:31
But that’s the point of what Adrian said.
Lesley Logan 32:33
But I don’t think so, because I think it goes to that saying: if you don’t have goals, someone will make their goals your goal, and so I feel like.
Brad Crowell 32:43
Your purpose can be inadvertent. Yeah, if you don’t take control of what you do, then your purpose will be defined for you, or it can accidentally become your purpose. Yes.
Lesley Logan 32:53
And if you don’t like it, then you’re the person going, “Why is my purpose just to do this project for this many years?” Where I think it’s important is this is where self-reflection is so important, because when you self-reflect, you are aware of when you are outgrowing something, or you are being called into something. I don’t know if we had a conversation with Adrian, but I definitely had a conversation, and I wrote a newsletter on it, is that a lot of people in the Pilates industry, like, “I need to figure out what my space is in this industry,” and it’s like, never do that, don’t do that. Because no one that you admire ever sat and goes, “What is my little circle in this industry?” No, they went out and carved their path, they created their thing. There’ll be an episode coming out that hasn’t already with me on Balanced Body’s podcast, where they’re like, “You carved out this thing.” I’m like, I had to, I had to create the thing that I needed. Some of you are already living your purpose, but you actually are looking at other people and going, “I need to look like them,” and you haven’t taken the time to reflect back, going, “Actually, the thing that I’m doing is the thing that’s my purpose, and it’s helping these people. And so now that I’m aware of that, I amplify that.” Because you’re out there amplifying and doing it, it will evolve, because you will continue to hone in and understand and be curious, and change things. So either it inadvertently finds you, and you’re doing someone else’s purpose, and they’ll be grateful, or you discover what it is. But if you look inside.
Brad Crowell 34:20
But that’s… yeah, it goes… you were both talking about self-reflection, but it goes back to, you know, your purpose in life is not something you find, it’s something that you do.
Lesley Logan 34:29
Yes.
Brad Crowell 34:30
And it is also… it’s a change and evolve over time.
Lesley Logan 34:33
It’s kind of like those movies where the person goes out in seek of what their purpose is, but really their purpose was there all the time, but they weren’t taking the time to see that it was there. Go self-reflect anyways. Anything else, Brad?
Brad Crowell 34:47
Yeah. He said with purpose you can navigate and make adjustments, right? And he talked about figuring out what actions match the frequency and energy of where you’re at right now.
Lesley Logan 34:57
Yeah, that’s true. That’s great.
Brad Crowell 34:59
Yeah, I mean, we’ll just leave it… we’ll just leave that there. Go back and listen, because…
Lesley Logan 35:04
Adrian is great.
Brad Crowell 35:05
Yeah, he’s great.
Lesley Logan 35:05
And I, by the way.
Brad Crowell 35:06
He does voice acting. How cool.
Lesley Logan 35:08
Well, let’s listen to his voice.
Brad Crowell 35:09
Yeah, it’s amazing.
Lesley Logan 35:10
Honestly, like, he should really write sleepy stories, like those sleep stories. I would listen every day.
Brad Crowell 35:16
Yeah.
Lesley Logan 35:17
I also would even listen to him share bad news with that voice, because it’s just like, you know, like the BBC type, where it’s just matter-of-fact, you know what I mean? Like, I think I could be like, “Okay, well, we’re not all gonna die, so there we go.” Adrian, thanks for being you. Thanks for being back. You guys, I’m Lesley Logan.
Brad Crowell 35:34
And I’m Brad Crowell.
Lesley Logan 35:35
Share our episodes with a friend who needs to figure out what their purpose is, and then leave a review. Yes, and then send in your win, because you’re someone who likes this podcast, or someone likes a checklist, and I just gave you three things that are easy to do, easy to check off. You’re gonna feel super successful in your day, so then you can go Be It Till You See It.
Brad Crowell 35:52
Bye for now.
Lesley Logan 35:53
That’s all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.
—-
Brad Crowell
It’s written, filmed and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell.
Lesley Logan
It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.
Brad Crowell
Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music and our branding by designer and artist Gianfranco Cioffi.
Lesley Logan
Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.
Brad Crowell
Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.
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