Shownotes

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In this episode you’ll learn about:

• It’s not wrong or right, it’s all a choice, what can it create, will it create?
• Open loops
  • Our brains want answers, they want a period. Completion. Judgement is a period. Don’t put a period on it.
• As a young girl I was very aware. Awareness, is it cool to be aware?
• Lemonade stand, unique ways to stand out, stand apart
• The planet grows and grows, changes and does whatever she needs to do to grow
• “What do you know?” Get curious
  • we’re brought up to listen to our parents, they know everything, we’re not supposed to be curious
  • LL: What would I be doing if I was already where I want to be?
• Remember When
  • or “Why?”
  • thinking, asking a curious question
  • PLAY A GAME
• We will do everything so that we can be right
  • there’s a lie here
  • we will find the signs/evidence in it so that we’re right
  • Top 5 Fears
  • “this feels heavy, so I’m not gonna do it”… is that a lie?
• Notice how she uses your NAME??? She says “Lesley” in every other sentence
• How can you partner up?
  • Play “Remember When”
• Action items from Joanna Vargas
  • You have a choice. Life isn’t happening TO you

Transcript

Hello! Oh my God I am so excited that you’re here. I am so excited that you are here. This is by far one of my most favorite interviews I’ve done so far truly love this woman I really can’t even wait, I’m gonna dive into her in a second, but first one to say, I am so happy that you’re here listening. You know, you could be doing a lot of things right now, and you are listening to this podcast. And I know, it’s because you’re looking for just a little something to get you through your day something remind you of who you are and why you’re here. And it’s I’m so grateful that you are taking your time maybe you’re in a run or a walk, or doing errands and I’m happy to be in your ears. And if you’re watching this on YouTube. Hello! I’m waiving right at you. So, you all, when I, when I think about the different people that I want to speak to, to bring to you. Part of it is my own oh I really want to talk to this person and cause I want to know what’s going on their mind. This woman, you’ll hear in the interview, but she, she truly changed the way I thought about things in the morning in one day, we we’re out of the photoshoot and you’ll hear the whole story in the interview so I want to give it away but I’m not kidding. Because of that moment, it changed how I ask questions, what I do and how I approach so many things. And this is what’s so fun. You can feel like you’re freaking absolutely 100% awesome because you are. And you can feel like you’re not and that’s okay but you’re awesome and I’m so happy you’re here so you can hear that reminder from me and the guests but you can feel like you’re there. And then there can be this other little like little thing that someone says that like just moves that needle forward in a different way that helps you maybe into the freaking straight ahead you’re looking a little bit to the left. And it’s like, Oh, there’s the thing that’s that’s the thing that’s been missing link. And so, here, let me just edify her cuz she’s freaking awesome please look in the show notes for her full for amazing, incredible 100% by out that will just have you going yeah. Wow. She is been awesome since she was a little girl, and maybe it will help you think about your whole life and journey and what got you to where you are right now, when you hear and read her by out. Cause like oh look at all the things that make you who you are. So Joanna Vargas Cradle to Life. A powerhouse entrepreneur right out of school. Joanna never worked corporate and chose the path less travelled. At 20 years old she formed her corporation, took all of her savings, and produced a dance showcase in Hollywood called The King of Pop. With Joanna’s quick, some might say crazy work ideas, this venture quickly turned into a dance competition called Max Out which now going on its 20th year. Using keen street smarts, and with no professional business training she created JB dance studio by the time she was 24, and built that business to 700 students. A true serial entrepreneur Joanna sold that dance studio and prepared to design her next download From the Universe. Joanna recognize the gap of compositions about minds in physical form when it came to fitness, and responded with a solution.

The Fit Factor Studio while the successful Brick and Mortar Fitness Studio catering to women their minds and living fully. In the process Joanna’s own workout philosophy builds on the principles at asking better questions and getting really curious about life, inspire for them make the choice to close the physical doors and go completely virtual with the Live Fully Academy. Now serving women all over the world with the three F’s – Form Fundamentals and Fun a new loop thought leader for Gen X and millennial women.

Joanna has two new podcast the Get Up Girl and Dance your Life. I’m so excited. I’m so excited. I need you to listen to this whole interview she is fire we go all over the place together I feel like we are definitely sisters in a past life, with a lot of fun chatting about different things and I really want to make sure that you hear her tips at the end because she is not just a girl who talks the talk and inspires. She is a girl who has super actionable things that if you start to incorporate your life, even one of these things, I know, it’s going to help you prioritize yourself in a different way, and really make sure that you are I mean living flat like she says.

So, also, I know that this is the hardest things it’s like intro-ing this episodes and not giving away all the things. But I can’t even wait for you to hear something she does with one of her friends that I, I swear, I may have to do this with my husband on a monthly basis of a date doing this thing because it’s like just such a fun way to look at the future of your life, and I can’t even wait for you to listen to that.

So with that, we’ll be right back for the full interview after this message.

EPISODE:

Lesley Logan – 06:33
Alright, everyone, I have the Joanna Vargas here with us today. And I’m, y’all I’m so grateful. And I met this woman. And we were in a mastermind. There’s like 50 people, but we kept getting paired together. And there was something about her that I just wanted to know more about, and the way things worked out. Because even though we both lived in LA at the time, you just don’t see people who live in LA. It’s like, it’s not really like that easy. And so, anyways, right? It’s just not like, you’re like, Oh, yeah, I live so close. But you’ll probably see the people who live out of LA more often than you see those that live in it. And traffic is real. And, and then when the mastermind ended, I really was a bit bummed that I didn’t get to know you more. And so we were luckily paired up on this shoot one day with Girl Squad Inc. And you’ve I don’t know if you know, but I was having a really low day that day, it was just not, not my best day. And I texted Monica I said, why hire someone, is like not showing up to the shoot. I’m hoping by the time the makeup and clothes, come on that like I’m as she says, I’m gonna be it. But I just want you to know if I’m a little low. That’s what’s going on. Anyways, there is no way to be low around you. Because you, you just exude love, joy. And, and I know that it’s not. It’s not always easy to do those things. But you really show up with that energy. And I couldn’t help but like, get into it too. And we got to have dinner together. And you told me about I wonder and how does it get better than this? And so, I want to give you a moment to introduce yourself but I just have to share that because as you listen to this, if you’re wondering like, what do I love this woman so much. This is you’ll you’ll know why because I love her since the day that we sat down and I even have a tattoo on my hand. Because of her, because, because you really made me have a possibility to step higher into myself and more into myself. So thank you for being here. Well, you tell people what happened when who you are, and, and how you got to be so awesome.

Joanna Vargas – 08:45
Lesley, thank you for that. I really appreciate you saying that. And that, we were able to connect that day because I totally get what you said out of 50 people and then you know what a possibility that you and I connected. And I am a born entrepreneur. I’ve never gone corporate. I started a business as soon as I was 18 years old. I was always very different. So in since I was a very young girl, I was always very aware Lesley, but pretending I wasn’t. And really pushing and mutilating myself into this form and structure of what this reality says a woman or person is supposed to be. And I, just always felt like just different and awkward. And, as I’ve become to realize who I am as an entrepreneur, I’ve fallen in love with myself and I fall in love with the process and the journey and now, I share it with others because what it is it’s truly happiness and it does sound cliche Lesley, like happiness and how the hell do I get it Joanna like, Okay, I get it. And so, what I love to do is actually break it down for people so it’s not a Instagram quote tile, it’s not a philosophical think positive because some girls, I mean, some days, you know, we don’t want to freakin’ think positive, I want to punch somebody, you know, throw it out. And like then I feel badly, because I’m not thinking positively right. And then I judge the hell out of myself. So that’s, that’s where I am right now. And still in the entrepreneurial game. I’ve owned a dance studio, a Fitness Studio, produce large events. And here’s the difference, Lesley, I used to only see myself as that person. And now I see myself. I’m not even sure yet. The question now is, who am I? Where before I thought, that’s who I was. And that’s it. And I was only defined by what I created in this planet. And now it’s like, Who am I today? And that’s who I am.

Lesley Logan – 10:50
I mean, so many things that I resonate with them there and I’m sure others do. But I love that you shared so open and honestly about the Who am I? Because I that question, I think is it’s kind of a detriment. Like, we’re all supposed to know who we are. And I think it’s so easy to then just put a label on yourself. Right? Like, I’m just a Pilates instructor when I’m not just Pilates instructor and it’s like, I’m just a business coach. Well, not just. And so it’s that I feel like it’s probably a journey, and I’ll learn who I am. When I’m looking down at the funeral of people talking about who I was.

Joanna Vargas – 11:23
I love that Lesley. Oh, my gosh, can I jump into a story because just the other night, I was talking to my boyfriend totally actualized him as well, we could talk about that. And we were talking about, how he had labeled me already. And it was interesting that we had this awareness that I shared something with him early on in the relationship and that he had unconsciously labeled me, that way. And now he’s tiptoeing around me not wanting to say something, because I am this person. And I said, look on, I am going to change every day, every five seconds, every five minutes. So ask me a question. Because when you don’t ask me a question, you automatically think I’m that same person. And let me tell you, in a year, in 10 years, when I’m 85 years old, I’m going to be so different. Please don’t put me in a box and a label. And what I thought Lesley was like, Oh, my gosh, I had this big awareness. I’ve done this to past relationships, men, women, it doesn’t matter. You know, romantic business wise, I meet them. So let’s say Lesley, I met you. And now I go, she was like this on day one. So now she has to be like that every single day for as long as I know her, rather than allowing, having the allowance for her to grow and with an arm growing. So, I do that to others. People do that to me. And I’m like, so they met me at 18. And I’m supposed to be the same person I was when I was 18. And so, I really see that we have these expectations on people on relationships, and it’s really been in my world lately.

Lesley Logan – 13:03
That took me back to this time. I remember, I didn’t know a lot about who I was yet because I was in college, but I was going back to my hometown. I’m from a very small hometown, and the girls get pregnant, pretty young and married and that’s kind of the thing and I like I got out. I mean, if you don’t know where I’m from, there’s a town called Lodi. Someone wrote a song about it (Joanna Vargas: Lodi!) about Oh Lord, stuck in Lodi again, I cannot, I cannot get stuck in this town. And and so when I came back, I was just about to graduate college. Actually, it was there for graduation. And I was managing a jewelry store. So like here I am, like not even 21 yet a managing a jewel, a high end accessory store in Orange County at South Coast Plaza. Like, in my little town life. I’m like, I’ve made it

Joanna Vargas – 13:50
You made it!

Lesley Logan – 13:52
I’ve made it. And I was, I was excited to go this graduation because I was going to see people from high school and I was like, Oh my God when they ask like because I grew up very awkward. I did not feel like I belonged in high school. I’m sure everyone thought I did. And we all think we don’t belong, right? But I really didn’t feel that, for so many reasons. And so here I am. I’ve made I can’t wait to tell people that like, I’m this big time. jewelry store manager right in, in Orange County. I live by the beach. And I see this girl I met in sixth grade. And she has, she’s got two kids. It’s been three years and I think she’s pregnant with a third. And she said, Oh my gosh, Lesley Logan. I said. Hi, you know, and she goes. What’s going on? And I said. Oh, like I’m a jewelry store manager in Orange County. I’m going to this college and I got one more year left and live by the beach. It’s so funny. Like, oh that’s it?

Joanna Vargas – 14:46
We’re so cute.

Lesley Logan – 14:48
It’s so funny because like, the labels we put on people, you might think the label you’ve even put on yourself is like spectacular and it sucks to somebody. So it’s just. And then from that moment on, I was like. Whoa, who? What am I trying to do here? And so that just took me back because it’s funny. People put labels on us and we can put labels on people or ourselves and it really doesn’t do anyone a good job.

Joanna Vargas – 15:13
Yes, right in a box. what’s right, what’s wrong? It’s like it’s exhausting. Oh my gosh, that’s a great story. It’s really cool.

Lesley Logan – 15:23
I was like, oh, okay, that was like my little, little angel going sit down, girl. You’re not there yet. We got things to do. Um, so, I, you know, you say you’re a born entrepreneur. And this is something that I think is is really cool because you know, everyone look in the shownotes her bio is freaking awesome, inspirational. What what she has done? What, what do I mean? I’m sure people to have these stories. But when they’re little kids, and they like sold lemonade, like, what was it that made you want to be an entrepreneur at 18? Did you know what it was?

Joanna Vargas – 15:55
Yeah, I had already started when I was gosh, six or seven. I used to go to my neighbor’s houses and pick their avocados from their trees and put it in my little red radio flyer. And then I would go back to their house Lesley and sell it back to them for like 50 cents. I was just a hustler. A little hustler before Jayla was a hustler. And I but I didn’t realize what I was doing. I was always creating Lesley, whatever it was, I was going to create something. Like, oh, I’m gonna sell this. I used to go, we used to go to Mexico, we were a little kid, you know, like, go to TJ and then I begged my mom, and I always I knew how to sell, I could even sell to my Mom. Mom, please might be buy me these bags of candies, because I’m going to go, and then I’m going to sell them for 25 cents, and I had the whole thing. So I would sell her, then I would go to school and sell them to my friends. And then I would do lemonade stands. But here’s the thing, I would always want to out create what I did before. Like, okay, those kids did eliminate standard, what I’m going to do is I’m going to add a lemon wedge, and I’m going to add a straw. I used to do things like that. And I’m and then Lesley, I used to get a smaller cup. And I was doing this not even realizing, how I was out creating what I did yesterday. If I make a smaller cup, I could sell it for five cents, because it’s less but I know people are going to tip me and give me a $1. But if I say it’s 50 cents, they’ll probably give me 50 cents. My brain was already starting to move things around like chess that way. And, and then in high school, I was just always wanting to, to create, that’s the best way I can describe it. I wanted to create, I wanted to create, if I wasn’t creating, I was bored to death. And when I was bored, Lesley, I would create drama in my life. And I know a lot of us on this planet. As humans, we create drama, because we’re bored. But we don’t know we’re bored. So we’ll create stuff, just like stupid stuff. I still do it till today, like my money situations, I’ll create drama with my money, just so I’m entertained with my money because my credit cards are here. And this is like what are you doing, Joanna, because you’re so bored. Because I can do 10 million things at once. But, I was always taught Lesley not to do 10 million things. Focus on one thing, you should do this. And like I said at the beginning, when he asked me I’m like I was always different. I can always do 10 million things. And now I’ve really fallen in love with that I can do a lot of things and that I can work last minute and then I am a procrastinator, and I do work better when I’m a procrastinator. So what it’s what I’m doing Lesley is I’m taking reality and I’m flipping it upside down. And it’s like, everything is opposite. Everything is opposite. Everything is opposite. Everything is opposite. And let me tell you, when you do that, it S with your brain. It really does. It’s like brain bombs. Like what because we’re so programmed, that procrastination is bad. And then when you live and go, I’m an amazing procrastinator, and I’m gonna rock the hell out of this. It really messes with your brain. So that’s what I’ve been playing with. I know this is really left field, but I’m not sure if that’s where you want to go.

Lesley Logan – 19:18
No, I love it. I’m loving left field. I’m left handed.

Joanna Vargas – 19:23
Okay, so let’s go there.

Lesley Logan – 19:25
So but I, here’s what I, what I love about this is like, you know, I think we are told something and so if we do it differently, even if it’s working, we’re questioning if I should be doing it that way we’re saying I know I’m not supposed to doing it this way, I’m not supposed to procrastinating and it’s like I to procrastinate on purpose very well. Right, like I, I, I find that the I know that I have to do the thing. And the thing is on my mind and it because it’s on my mind. It’s in there and it’s percolating. It’s coming up with things and then I’m exposing myself to other things. And I’m like, okay, it’s due on Tuesday. And I know for a week it’s due. But I’m the life I’m living between now. And when it’s due, it all affects it. And so, you know, I definitely wouldn’t write a 50 page paper the night before I’ve done that. It’s not pleasant. But, um, you know, my team is like the news they want the newsletters do a week before, this is my team, right? My husband and all of them. They’re very organized. They’re very detailed people. So all the due dates are a week before everything. And I’ve told them. You will get it two days before, because that’s when it’s due to me. And so I, I know that it’s there. But the difference is like, whether I let the procrastination stress me out or inspire, right, and I think that what you are doing is that you’ve just been like, I’m gonna question everything I was ever told is wrong. And I’m going to explore how I can make it right. Because I’m different. I’m, I’m Joanna and no one can be me. And so I think that’s really cool. If you’re listening this, it’s, you know, maybe you can only focus on one thing at a time. That’s okay. But do it if that’s because you know, that, that’s what you can do. And not because someone told you that?

Joanna Vargas – 21:06
Yes. Oh, Lesley, because then we’ll use the tools against us. Well, Joanna said procrastination is better. I’m like, no, no. What I, what I would like to say is, I’m saying everything is a question. Everything is choice. Everything is choice. And when we believe that we don’t have choice, then we become small. And so I’m not saying that I always procrastinate. I’m saying I asked a question and go, you know what it feels like to procrastinate right now. And even that word feels like icky to me, but it’s the best word I can use to describe the energy that I’m trying to say. Right? But really, what it just means is, I just do it when I do it. That’s, that’s what it really means to me. The word procrastination, I choose to do it, when I want to do it. That’s it. It’s almost like food. People go, what’s your diet? What do you eat, and I’m like, I just eat when I’m hungry. That’s it. It’s real simple. I just eat, I asked my body what it wants, I eat when I’m hungry. And that’s real. It’s, it’s really that simple. You know, and I’m not judging the hell out of a piece of food. Because there’s just so much judgment on this planet. Like everything is a judge-able, judgeable, judgeable thing. We’re gonna judge this, this is right. This is wrong. This is black. This is white. This is up. This is down. This is left. This is right. It’s like, Oh, my gosh, what if it’s all of it. And my word for this year, Lesley, I have my little my intent bracelet is the word “And”. I’ve really been obsessed and like in love with this word. “And” because “and” for me is abundance. I am nice and I’m a bitch. I am beautiful and that could be really ugly. You know, I am so sweet and sometimes that could be a fire breathing dragon, you know, and there’s no right or wrong. It’s all a choice, Lesley of what’s going to create more for that moment. So here’s a little story. A couple days ago, I was having a little quarrel with my boyfriend. And we were communicating and talking about, you know, what just happened? And I asked. What’s going to create more right now and the awareness that I got was me throwing a tantrum, was going to create a lot. And I did I threw a tantrum, I was on the phone, I was cursing I was I’m like, I’m pissed off. I’m so, I’m so annoyed. And I’m so bitter, and I threw a magical tantrum. We hung up. And the next day there was so much created out of that tantrum. But I could have looked at it and judged it and go. No, Joanna, you should not throw a tantrum, or only two year olds throw tantrums, etc, etc. But there’s no right or wrong. There was no judging on it. It was just what’s going to create more. And a lot of times we judge things, let’s say for example, because of the pandemic right now, we judge the virus. I don’t want to get the virus because it’s bad. And I wonder if the question is what’s going to create more right now? And sometimes I wonder if you got the virus? Will it create more for you? I’ve known people that got the virus and they made changes in their life and it actually created more for them. Like the planet, us, having this pandemic has created more for the planet in weird ways and crazy ways, but it’s created so much. Do you get what I’m saying? But if we look at it is wrong or right? What can it create? Right?

Lesley Logan – 24:22
Because you’re you’re definitely saying like if we look at this tantrum as bad and you shouldn’t have a tantrum anymore, you’re actually taking away the lessons that you could that you could learn from the tantrum. So maybe, yes, you don’t have to have as big of a tantrum next time or the have the tantrum next time. But to judge the tantrum, you discount all that you get from it. And it’s true. Like, I mean, there’s so much interesting things about I think people really don’t, don’t often see how things are happening for them. And it is terrible. I hate that at this point of recording this like half a million people have lost their lives to this and, and but because of COVID my entire business has changed in a way that is for me. (Joanna Vargas: Yeah) You know, and, and I think it goes back to what you were saying his choice. Instead of sitting back and going. Oh my gosh, 60% of my business for the year is canceled. I guess I’ll just teach virtually still. And I just well wait till this is over, instead of taking that, and when damn I was like, Well, what can I do? Like asking the question I and I, while you’re talking about judgment, it made me think like judgments is a period and you are so like a question mark to life. Like, you’re always questioning life. And when you judge you put a period on it, and our brains like closed loops, so they will just take that judgment in and they’re like, that’s it. But you were the one who like really reminded me, how amazing open loops are, which tend to I have the I wonder on my hand, because I, it’s so easy for me from the way I was raised. I was not raised by entrepreneurs, I was not no one in my family really isn’t. So having this. Having this open loop, I can think about it. Like, I wonder how I’m going to do this right now. I’m like, Oh, we can’t, we can’t travel anymore. So nothing we can do for this business is going to happen. Well, what can I do? And it’s funny, when you just put that out there, your brain starts thinking about things. But the period on that would have just, I would still be in a 500 square foot apartment. Probably, looking at my laptop, sitting on my bed because we didn’t even have a table. So there’s no room. So I just really love that you. You talk about judgment, and you’re and you’re seeing the the appreciation and the positivity and the, and the possibilities. And all the things whether they are in air quotes, good or bad. I think that’s really cool.

Joanna Vargas – 26:38
Lesley, I love that way that you said a period. Yeah, it’s putting the end to the book. If when you answer something. Because our brains are not that smart, we think they are. But actually, infinite intelligence is way more, has way more possibilities than what our brains can put on. And what our brains do is they put a period, and they conclude. So whenever our brain wants answers, and when we’re willing to not have the answer, and to have the awareness because answers and awareness are different. And some people say intuition. And for me, the word awareness is a little more lighter. But awareness is like you knowing. Animals have awareness. Animals are the most aware on this planet. They function from awareness. Like there could be a rabbit and rabbits won’t mate. If they know it, there’s going to be a, like a drought coming. So they won’t mate. Right? They already can feel it. And I wonder as humans, do we have that same awareness that animals have, like in Thailand, remember what the big tsunami back so many years ago, and so many animals went to high ground a day, days before the tsunami? That’s awareness. Right?

Lesley Logan – 27:59
Right. That’s insane

Joanna Vargas – 28:00
Right. And I’m like saying it right. I mean, that’s so cool. I am so intrigued by that. I’m like, Oh, my God, it’s amazing. Elephants that had been chained down, you know, in Thailand, they use elephants and for, for fun anyway. But they had left the chains and walked away. Nobody’s like, where are these animals going? That’s awareness. And I’m like, so the question for me, Lesley is how much more awareness can I have? And like I said, at the beginning, I’m like, I was always so aware as a young girl, but I was pretending I wasn’t. And so that’s why I always kind of felt disconnected from this world. Because I was so aware. Like, I always knew stuff. But I’m like, nobody else knows this. I’m the only one. So then I thought I was the weirdo.

Lesley Logan – 28:44
So I and I love this. I want to go back to this. And because I too, I think I was totally forget thinking I wasn’t aware. But it’s because it’s not, it wasn’t cool to be aware. It wasn’t cool to stand out. It still isn’t cool. I have a client who’s I think she’s 16 now and, you know, we’re talking about something and she said, yeah, but you know, the other kids in school don’t like that. Whatever it is, and I just want to be the only went out and I was like, it’s okay to be the only person out and you need to know that I’m not saying this is the time you choose that don’t you know, you listen to you, but someone needs to tell you that it’s so okay to be the only person who disagrees with something because I wish I had known that I wish I had disagreed more I think I would have I would have learned more from that. That, that tension. And then then I did and just like going with the flow and like pretending I didn’t know that I was aware that I had uniqueness around things but a unique way of thinking about things and, and, you know, in business I everybody who’s listening is probably thinking, yeah, but someone’s already doing that. They might even look at you and I go I want to do it. They’re they’re already doing it. And it’s like actually like, you can do it because you’re so unique. Like you can’t put that away what you were telling that story about the lemonade. You’re like, Okay, well they did that, but I’m gonna have a straw and I’m gonna have a smaller cut, like you’re finding unique ways to stand out. And so I just I think that it’s I wish more girls specifically knew that it was okay to, to actually like to be unique.

Joanna Vargas – 30:17
I love that you said that Lesley, because what came up for me is that the planet, okay? Does not think that way. For example, weeds will grow and they don’t go, well, I’m not going to grow because that weed is higher, weeds just grow, or a bird doesn’t wake up in the morning and go, well, I don’t feel like chirping today cuz that bird is chirping louder, like, the planet doesn’t see that. Let’s look at Mother Earth, Mother Earth is infinite. If you look, she will just keep growing and growing and growing. And just she will change she will move and change and do whatever she needs to do in order to keep creating. But as humans, we don’t do that. Right. And I wonder what else is possible for us as humans to to watch the planet and go wow, like I just look at nature. And I’m like, wow, how can I be more like that tree? And I know that might sound airy fairy? All good. But do they know something? Animals know something? I look at dogs. And I’m like, wow, how can it be more like a dog? Where they’re just like, whatever, they have no point of view. And that’s why people love them. Right? Okay, but and this is another thing. For my parents that are listening or even, you know, non parents a great question to ask somebody that feels stuck. Like, you know, when you have a girlfriend, you’re talking to her whatever, and she’s just stuck or your kids are stuck, or you’re quiet that 16 is stuck. A great question is, so what do you know? What do you know about this? And you’ll see, like, people’s brains are like that. They’re like, what do you mean? What do you mean? What do I know? What do you mean? But we’re gonna start to uncreate that we don’t know. Like, what do you what do you know? I remember the first time I was asked that question, and I was like. What do you mean? My logical brain was so fixated on wanting to, you know, punch that person that was asking me because I didn’t know at that moment. I was so logically trained. And I was a very good little girl, even though I was in my 30s, when I was asked this question, but I was still, I’m good. Don’t tell me that I know stuff. Because I don’t know this. And I need the answer. And I’m paying you to give me the answer. I was very stuck on that. So I get it. And the more that I get curious, I’m like, Yeah, what do I know here? Because Lesley, I think as we’re young children are, we’re brought up we’re brought up not to know, our parents know everything. We and then we grow up and we’re like, our parents don’t know everything. I think that’s why as teenagers, we get pissed off. Like I was a 12-13 year old brat, I was a horrible brat. And I really look back and I’m like, what was that? Joanna? What was? What was that brightness? And I really think because I thought that my parents knew everything. They were Superman and Superwoman. And then I’m like, oh, they’re human. They don’t know everything. But they’re still telling me what to do. So I didn’t know how to how to articulate it. So what I knew to do was to be a rebel back and roll my eyes and give attitude. But it was because I knew that I knew stuff. But everybody’s looking at me like I don’t. You’re a child. You’re dumb. Be quiet. Find the answers.

Lesley Logan – 33:29
Me, I feel like that’s one of the definitions of going crazy, like. Right? Like that. Like, I love this observation. I’m sure there’s like a child therapist out there going. Ha! We might have just solved.

Joanna Vargas – 33:41
Oh, oh, yes!

Lesley Logan – 33:42
Thanks

Joanna Vargas – 33:43
That’s simple. I know!

Lesley Logan – 33:46
But, you know, you’re I, I want to go into that word, curiosity, because I do and I remember wanting to make changes happen in my business and pretending like I didn’t know and like thinking. Okay, if I just buy this next course, then I’m no learn the thing. And the being so disappointed in the course because I’m like, I did that already. Like I did. And it didn’t work.

Joanna Vargas – 34:07
And it’s your fault. And I wasted my money.

Lesley Logan – 34:11
And, and I’m, and I mean, I remember I was even in a mastermind, and everyone was like, giving me my own advice back on how to make more time and I’m like, Yeah, no, I know that. That’s the advice I have in my course. But it’s, I can’t do that right now. And then and then I and then I was like, I think I got a super frustrated the fact you know, you get frustrated enough, you’re gonna figure it out. Because you’re like, I’m so tired of being this frustration. I’m choosing to live in it. So let’s figure this out. But I don’t know when it was that I was like, I heard being more curious or the word curiosity again, it’s not like it goes away, but you kind of just become aware of it. And I’m like, I need to be a little bit more curious. What if I don’t know. You know, what if I, what if I, what if I don’t like, what if it isn’t this answer, what if it’s another thing and and using those awareness, like talent. And I remember hearing like, you know, if you can be the thing that you want to be, what would that thing? What would that person do? And I was like, what I do if I was already where I wanted to be, and making changes, and that is when, I mean, it is not abundance. It wasn’t like endless things, but it was enough ideas that my brain didn’t know. It’s like, oh, look what I do know. Now, look what I do know about that. And I just got stuck on that. And so I really, I really love that you talked about, Joanna like curiosity, and, and, and coming up with these questions, because I really, I think that we, we pretend people don’t know enough. So we tell them, they don’t know enough, then they believe that they don’t know enough. And then they’re stuck. And then they go back to the people who still told them they don’t know enough. And so I think as, as, as listeners, like, who do you know, that needs that question? Who do you know in your life that needs to be asked? So what do you know, right now? What do you know? I would I would challenge everyone to go do that. I want to check because I’m in love with something of that you. You did with a friend. And it’s an can you tell us about the Remember When?

Joanna Vargas – 36:10
Yeah, there’s this game that I play, I have some girlfriends that know it. And it’s called Remember When, and we’ll just sit there. And we’ll just drink coffee or sometimes just some wine. And we just say remember when and we talk about things in the past as if they’ve already happened. So last summer, I was sitting at the park with a girlfriend we’re like, Hey, remember when you’re at my wedding, she’s like, Oh my gosh, and we will give details. Remember when I made that toast, and then I fell on my dress and we just start laughing, we will tell the most detailed stories. Oh my gosh, remember when we went to Vegas, and we had that phenomenal bachelorette party. And then we got free food and we didn’t have to pay for anything that whole night. And then she’ll come in and go. Yeah, remember when we took that helicopter, we will go on and on. Remember when that guy he came and he just spoiled the heck out of me. Another thing we do is we’ll send text to each others. And we’ll say, why are men so great to me? Why do men treat me like queens? Why do men buy me whatever? Like just on and on? And I’m like, Oh, yeah, why? Why is it? And then the universe will show you why men are so good do or you could say. Why are my clients just given me so much money because of nothing? And then she’ll text me? Yeah. Why are they? So we’re already thinking and asking a question of true curiosity. And as if it already happened. And so what find somebody out there, then you can play this game with because not everybody will get it right. And the ones that do get it, text message. Have a little session, a little zoom session get together. I really truly, it’s so fun and make a game like little kids play Lesley. Right?

Lesley Logan – 37:57
This is, this is my mind is not the right word. But like, it makes me giddy because I meet so many people, you know, the typical goals. Coaching thing is to like think about your future. 10 years out five years out, and so many people if you’re stuck, like I get it, you cannot think out that far. You’re like. No, I am not paying the bills today, I cannot think at that point, you don’t think big enough. And what I love about this is it’s playful. And it’s fun. And because of that you’re willing to go into those big places that your like your true soul wants to have. And it’s going to give you instead of like where you really want to go because jokes are all half truths, right? Or they’re like, they’re like, you know, so like, that’s what’s really fun for me. And I mean with technology. What a fun game on Marco Polo, we’re like, (Joanna Vargas: Oh yeah!) you’re not they don’t pay for this ad but like, like, I just love, like, you could be on your workday. And instead of having to wait for your friend to actually be free, you could video them and go, Okay, remember when I met the man of my dreams, and now we’re to get like, and then they can come back? And they and it’s just this conversation that keeps on going and what it, what it comes back to the whole asking your brain questions because it’s like open loops. We see evidence for what we believe to be true. And thoughts become facts, right? So they become beliefs. And so you’re putting out into the universe something that you want to be true. And then you start looking for that evidence. Instead of texting the friend like we all have done like. Oh, why is everyone such a flake to me? And so then you only see flakes?

Joanna Vargas – 39:28
Yes. Because we want to be right. Let’s get real. Everything we will do, Lesley so that we can be right. Just the other day, I went to this chiropractor, and it’s a long story. But one of one of the things in order to get to this chiropractor was, I was fighting myself not to go. So what happened was the girl at the front had my email wrong. They messed up the times. I was supposed to be, they’re like, all these things were happening to make me right. So I didn’t have to go, you get what I’m saying. And I was I was that horrible client there. I know they were already talking about me because when I came in, he’s a healer, right? And he said, Joanna, you need to let stuff go. He’s like, you were already being difficult to book you hear for this, for this appointment. And then everything in my body, Lesley wanted to defend why I was difficult to book that appointment. And again, because I want it to be right. And it’s been bugging me ever since. And I’m like, Joanna, what is that? What is it that you want to be right? What is the lie here? There’s a lie here. And the lie is not him. The lie is that I always have to be right. And it doesn’t matter what’s going to happen regardless, you know? So anyway, we will create stuff like you said, we will find the evidence to make us right. And I was finding evidence not to go to this appointment, even though it was the best thing for me, but I was fighting it. Right. And well, and then because what we want to say Lesley is, see, I told you, see I told you I was that that guy was a jerk. See, I told you I shouldn’t have gotten to that chiropractor, right?

Lesley Logan – 41:11
Oh my god, I love this story. Because I didn’t, I thought of like four different times in my life where I’ve definitely not wanted to do something like in the resume link is wrong. This is wrong. And now they’re wasting my time.

Joanna Vargas – 41:23
I told you!

Lesley Logan – 41:26
And it’s like, and it’s so funny. Because if you can take a moment just to like, Okay, I’m here now, like, for whatever reason, this is happening for me? What can I learn from this? When I can have the awareness to do it? I’m always shocked and surprised. And some of my favorite people in life are from like, things that I like, like literally fought like a two year old to not do and I’m like, Oh my god, I’m so embarrassed. I could never tell that.

Joanna Vargas – 41:50
Isn’t that interesting, Lesley? Even this new doctor, he’s like, my favorite person now on this planet. But man, it took me a year and a half to book this appointment, Lesley, because I was thinking about it. And then, I was like, going through again, the loop that you said the period it was like, No, no, no, finally, I book it and everything. And it wasn’t because I could have used the tools against me, Lesley, I could have said, See, it’s not meant to be I shouldn’t go right. And we do that to ourselves. Remember, I said we let’s flip everything upside down. So a lot of times in the metaphysical world in the spiritual world will say, See, it’s not meant to be I shouldn’t go to this, which I call Bs, where we’re creating this, I was creating this drama, not to go because it was more pricey. This is this guy is not cheap, right? So my logical brain was like, how can I get out of this? How can I out create this because I don’t really want to spend the money. And that was the truth. That was the lie. The lie I was telling myself was the money part. But I was telling myself that it was about him. And the front desk girl. So that was the lie. And so I wanted to make myself right. Anyway, so that I mean. That’s all

Lesley Logan – 42:59
There’s so many, there’s so many things in there that I generally I’m like, Oh my God, we could talk about for hours, because I think it’s so funny what we will say when it’s just to avoid the truth, which is like, there’s probably fear and like, what are you going to find out, you know, but like, I, I try, I try to be very aware of like, the top five fears that are out there. And like I’m like, which one am I, which one am I doing right now because like, you know, like that is on a good day. You know, we all have days where like, I’m leaning into this fear so hard. I’m just gonna enjoy wallowing in it but, um, but it’s, it’s, it’s just something that it’s so important that everyone hears this from women like yourself for me, but, but people who are going every day after their dreams, like the honesty about it, but you said something about obstacles. And it’s true, I would hear people say, Oh, it’s a sign. Like, this is a sign. And I, I want I want to say that I like loved believing in signs. And I do think there are signs but I think we, we look for signs for which we want to see the signs for so you can’t you can’t believe all the signs you see. Because you are looking for evidence to prove yourself, right? And whatever your self is showing up. Like it might be the self that is like, like, like telling you you’re not gonna make it and you’re like, Oh, look at this sign or like, That thing’s not gonna work. I could have seen COVID as the sign that like, like, this isn’t gonna work. And instead, like, I just was like, Okay, how is this happening for me? What have I been asking for? I’ve been asking for time. I’ve been asking for time. Okay, so next time more specific. I would like more time where the rest of the world doesn’t suffer. That would be awesome. So next time I’ll be more specific. I would like to have more time and a runway up and come. But what did I want to have more time for? Okay, this and so it’s so I think obstacles are actually not signed at all. They are, they show me how much I want to fight for something. I’m willing to like, take out that obstacle that I must really want and if I I take the obstacle as Oh, that’s it. That’s as far as we go. Well done. I didn’t want it enough. And like, at least you’re finding out now like, good. Like, it’s good to know sooner before you like, invest more time and do it right.

Joanna Vargas – 45:12
Damn, Lesley, this is good. I mean, we’re like, whoever’s listening right now play this on repeat, because this is good.

Lesley Logan – 45:17
I feel like we’re listening to this myself. And I need to remember.

Joanna Vargas – 45:22
Yes, yeah. Because we will use the tools against us. I see it all the time. Joanna does feels heavy, so I’m not going to choose it. Just because it feels heavy. Like when it doesn’t feel good. Like, no, no. What’s the lie here? There’s a lie that you’re telling yourself a lie. That’s the truth? That’s a great question. What’s the lie here? Now that one’s like a whole other question. Because our brains like what do you mean? What’s the lie? What’s the lie? What’s the lie? Don’t worry about it. It will show up. You know?

Lesley Logan – 45:50
Yeah, yeah. Yeah. There’s, there’s, it’s, it’s just so it’s so good. It’s so good. Um, I, I mean, obviously, we can talk for hours. So we’ll have to do this again, for many reasons. So if you are listening, you have more questions you want us to take on in life? Let us know, drop it in my comments. And I’ll make sure that we, we address it on another talk. Because I mean, we could almost have her own panel. And yes, I mean up something right now, wouldn’t it be cool if we had a panel of

Joanna Vargas – 46:21
Of conscious conversations? Yeah, like taking things that are out there and just flipping them and making them different? Because I think right now, the conversations we’re having our limiting, they’re great. And what else can we create? I think they still have a cap right now of most of the conversations that are being created.

Lesley Logan – 46:40
Yeah, I love that I, before I, before I met, Brad, I was like, in this Limbo of life, I left my ex and I was there was a homeless period, which is not my first time being homeless. So that’s a whole other story all but I had some one of my clients paid for me to have like a birth chart reader. And let me tell you, like, part of me was like, You spent how much on this person instead of like, giving me the money. I’m literally living on my credit card. But I went to listen to, I listened to this person tell him we had an hour and he said, I’m looking at your chart. And I just want you to know you’ve gone as far as you can by yourself. (Joanna Vargas: Wow!) You cannot there’s you you can do things on your own. You are powerful enough to do things on your own. But you will what you what you have achieved to this point. This is, this is the life you will be living if you decide to go things alone. And so he’s like, what opportunities do you have to partner up with people? I’m not saying you partner up in business, but what opportunities do you have? And so that’s when I like, had a dating blog with a friend. And I had I started doing all these different anything I could partner up and like going to art places like just not going alone, right. And I’m an outgoing introvert. You also it’s like super easy for me to go things alone. Somebody was listening to a podcast today, but they go well, she’s a high functioning introvert. And I’m like, oh, what’s an interesting way of putting it? Yes, that’s me. Yes, yeah. So So I was like, I took that. And I was like, Okay, so I’m actually limiting myself by not being open and aware. And so, and so I know, I’m on this journey, where I’m meeting these amazing women, someone like you, I can go, Oh, this is why I was supposed to because if I had just tried to do this on my own, I wouldn’t have joined a mastermind I wouldn’t have partnered, I definitely would not have like, let my husband helped me with my business. Like, no, I can do it alone. And, and it’s just so it’s important for us to like continue to ask questions, but like, where are we holding ourselves back? What are we doing that limit ourselves? I love you. I love these questions that you have put into our minds today.

Joanna Vargas – 48:44
Lesley, I got that. Like I heard it right now. Oh, my gosh, I have the goosebumps. I received from what you just said. I heard Joanna. Oh, my gosh, how can you partner up, you’ve hit how much you’ve done by yourself. Oh, my gosh, thank you. I really appreciate that. Because I heard it. Wow!

Lesley Logan – 49:03
Oh, and now I have chills. And I’m about to cry. So we’re gonna do this. Remember when? Remember when we had this amazing women’s panel. And we brought all these women together? And we talked about how they could turn things on their heads and find something and where they see a period and actually put a question mark on it.

Joanna Vargas – 49:20
And Lesley, remember when Oprah reached out to us and she wanted us on her super soul now I cried when Oprah reached out that wasn’t so much fun.

Lesley Logan – 49:30
I know because we also to say we’re so busy actually. So can we do it on a different day? And Oprah was like, Yeah, I have to move my schedule around for you.

Joanna Vargas – 49:39
Because Oprah knew we were. That amazing!

Lesley Logan – 49:42
Oh my gosh. So, Joanna this will not be our last time chatting into the ears of people but where can people find you? Now if they because they’re gonna want to like just learn so much from you and absorb as much as they can.

Joanna Vargas – 49:55
Please follow me on Instagram at I’m at JoannaVargasOfficial and I do free 30 day challenges and I go live every day. And Lesley, I’m going live every day for the full year. And every month is a different challenge. And I really got the awareness because one of the questions was, what can I create this year? What can I do? And I got the awareness too. In order for me to shift Lesley, I got to do this for a full year. Like, like how you just said, you’re limiting yourself by doing it by yourself. What I received was Joanna, you’re limiting yourself by doing it for a month. If you do it for a year. This is gonna, this is gonna stretch the hell out of you.

Lesley Logan – 50:35
Okay, I, I can’t wait. I, I see. Because here’s the thing. I’m on my phone in the morning when you go live.

Joanna Vargas – 50:41
Do you see? Joanna’s live and like, there she is again!

Lesley Logan – 50:45
I say it, that the day 26 journal is and this is me. I’m like, I’m gonna wait till the next one. I want to start at the beginning, which is so dumb. So tomorrow, I’m just gonna start with you. Oh my gosh, so y’all, please follow Joanna at JoannaVargasOfficial in Instagram, tell her how much you love her and what you got from this, if you can screenshot this podcast, and you can tag us on Instagram. And let us know what you got from it, we would love to hear because I, I know that it’s, it just takes some a word that brings it to your attention that can change and pivot and put you on a trajectory that you that you were supposed to be on this whole time. So if we did that, we want to hear about it. So we could just congratulate you and cheer you on. Like that’s all we just want to like, give you a high five virtually. So thank you for being here. I love you. I really, really love you.

Joanna Vargas – 51:33
And Lesley, I’d like to acknowledge you because you’re one of those people in my life now that I can really create with and I’m excited to see what’s going to be created. And to everybody listening. I want to acknowledge you for having a new possibility, like something shifted in our conversation today. And I want to acknowledge us for that.

Lesley Logan – 51:54
I know. I know. If there’s something really big about to happen. (Joanna Vargas: Yeah) Another big thing for us. Yeah. (Joanna Vargas: Yeah). Thank you for saying that. Thank you.

Joanna Vargas – 52:04
Thanks everybody!

Lesley Logan – 52:11
There we go.