Shownotes

An episode all about redefining curiosity. Curiosity, judgement, and awareness is not a positive or negative. It can be neutral, it can be a new way to look at a situation and it can be infinite. Stop limiting your possibilities and begin making demands for yourself.

If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co. Or leave a comment below!

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In this episode you will learn about:

• How to become the question
• Redefining judgment to not be neutral. It doesn’t have to be a positive or a negative thing.
• The whole new realm of curiosity. What is curiosity is infinite?
• Learning to choose as you go
• Going beyond the answer for unlimited possibilities.
• Choice creates awareness

Transcript

Lesley Logan
Okay. We’re like going sent back to the future, kind of like that. And then when we’re going back to the future. I am thrilled. I’m so thrilled. I was recently on our this week’s guests podcast, probably earlier this summer, actually. And I was like, “Oh my God, I have to have her back on the pod.” Because y’all love her so frickin much like, to this day, I still get people quoting her podcast. She is episode number one numero uno, Joanna Vargas. She’s one of the dearest women in my life. She always inspires me, she really like it’s like, she’s like fuel for like, like the soul like, was it like chicken soup for the soul, she’s that she’s that? (Lesley laughs) She is. And I wanted to bring her back on because I know that she’s like, been changing her business, changing what she’s doing. And I think I said this in the podcast, but I’m gonna get a little bit more detailed here. I feel like it’s really easy for me to bring guests on, for them to share their story with you and you to go, “Oh, they’ve made it. Goal achieved. They’re it, there exactly… that’s it.” And I have a guest coming up for you. His name is Alan Jr. Stein, Stein Jr., Alan Stein, Jr. and he said, “You’ll never see me in an art museum. I am not going to be a completed work. Like I’m never going to be a finished piece of art. I’m always in process.” And so I share that because I brought, I bringing Joanna on because I really do want you to see that we don’t, anyone you listen to, anyone you’re seeing on social media people that you’re aspiring and and being inspired by their not finished pieces of work, they are works in pro… in in progress always or and if they’re not, then then they’re missing out on the whole point of life I feel like. And so I loved Joanna’s vulnerability, her authenticity, how she’s willing to share that she is in process. And she is working on something new and working out some new things and just really feeling it out and what does that look like? And I thought it’d be so fun for you to almost get behind the scenes of someone’s life. And so I hope this brings you joy, makes you think, makes you ask yourself different questions and allows you to give yourself permission that you are not, you do not have to be perfect, that’s boring anyways, and that you to get to be in process, in progress, in practice and whatever other P word that allows you to to grow and be it till you see it. So here’s Joanna Vargas.

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Lesley Logan
Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I’m Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I’ve trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it’s the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It’s a practice, not a perfect. Let’s get started.

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EPISODE

Lesley Logan
All right, Be It babes. I have, I have, well, she’s a numero uno. She’s number one. Joanna Vargas was episode one of the Be It Till You See It podcast. And first of all, when I mean episode one, I mean, before I start this podcast, I was like, “What friends will say yes to someone who has no listeners? And who will believe in in everything that we’re doing here?” And Joanna was, well Joanna is always fiery and always inspiring and truly an incredible friend. And so I was recently on her podcast and I was like, “We have to just have you back on and share your journey of where you are now.” Because I think a lot of times we get excited about someone and then we just think, “Oh, they’ve done it. They’ve made it.” Like they’re they’re in an art gallery. But we’re always evolving, always changing. So Joanna Vargas, welcome back to the Be It pod. Tell everybody what’s going on, what’s been going on since we last spoke?

Joanna Vargas
Be It squad, I’m so excited to be here. When, Lesley when you asked me to be on it again. I mean, I’m so blessed and humbled because many times you’ll be asked to be on a podcast but when you come back twice is like, oh, yeah. (Lesley: Yeah.) And to be first on yours was so cool. And I still have many of your followers DM me all the time with like questions, because I’m the question girl. So where I am now is a much lighter place than where I was before. I’m not where I would like to be yet, right? I mean, maybe all of us can say that but I’m much better lighter place. And so I’m producing two events right now. And (Lesley: Oh my God.) I got a podcast going on. And I’ve been teaching a lot more in fitness and really discovering a whole new way to teach fitness so that it doesn’t drain and kill me. And you know, it only took 25 years to figure that out. That’s where I am now.

Lesley Logan
Yeah. Oh, well. Yeah, I that I understand as a, as a teacher as well, I understand that so much. And I think we can even talk about that in a moment. But I, first of all two events, that’s, I love it you’re like, “I’m in a lighter place. I’m just doing two events and the podcast, and I’m just teaching more.” But for those of you who haven’t listened to the episode one, you’re gonna go back and listen to after this one. Joanna is the question girl, how does it get any better than this? And that’s something that like, you’ve, you’ve taught me, I have the tattoo, I wonder on my hands, I’m always in wonder because of you. So I’m not getting stuck in the like, what could go wrong? It’s like, what what could go right? Like, I wonder what could happen next. And I in my Agency, coaching group, people literally still go, how does it get any better than this? Like after like their wins, after like a thing I say, and it’s just so cool that this many years later, I mean, I know you’re on the pod last year, but like you’ve had you in our groups before they still quote that about you. And so, I know like you’ve made these changes? Are you still the question girl? Are you asking different questions of yourself? Like, what’s been going on there?

Joanna Vargas
I’m still a question girl. And a new thing that I am developing and kind of moving into is actually being the question. So when I learned how to ask questions, I was asking them. Now I know this may sound like, “Okay, what are you talking about Joanna?” But when you’re actually being the energy of curiosity, so you be the question all the time without even having to use words, without even having to use a sentence, you actually be the energy of curiosity, more and more and more. And that’s where I’m stepping into. Because I’m noticing Lesley, when I asked questions, I’m kind of going through the motions. And it’s almost like it’s just a sentence with the question mark at the end. And it almost lost its validity because I was doing it so often. Now, they have opened up so much for me. But I still know that when I was asking the question, I was searching for the answer, even though I was saying I’m looking for the awareness, because an answer is limited. And I was still looking for me, so that I can get it right. I still was looking so that it could feel easy in my life. And what I’ve discovered is that, ‘how does it get any better than this’, can actually come into your life as complete shit. (Lesley laughs) And you’re like, “This is better?” And I’ve noticed I’m more aware that I am really judgmental on this is good and this is shit. And so when I ask, how does it get better? I’m actually judging that I want it to feel better. And what if the universe, what if God life wants to gift you something so freakin incredible, that you can’t even fathom if you were here for lifetimes and lifetimes and lifetimes. If you had a pen and you can write down a million things that you would never ever, ever come up with. But it may show up and look and feel like shit at the beginning maybe shit for 10 years. But it actually is so incredibly amazing. And so I’m releasing the judgment of I’m asking but with a little asterix of but I want it like this.

Lesley Logan
So I this is what I love. Okay, I there’s a couple of things here. Because I think when I first met you and you were doing that, how does it get any better than this? You were ‘being it’ like, you had that curiosity and that energy and you were exploring it. And I think just like any new thing, right? Like, I can do a new fitness thing. We’re like, curious and excited. And we’re like sharing our goals. And then it kind of becomes part of the routine. And then it big. It’s it’s like a relationship. Like when you’re first a relationship. It’s like hot and heavy and so fun and you can’t wait to see them. And you’re like, when you kiss them, you’re actually thinking about kissing them. And then like, you know, you start thinking, “Oh, I’m kissing you. And I also have to get out the door. And I can’t forget that thing over there.” Like do you know what I mean? (Joanna: And I gotta do laundry and I’m kissing you.) Yeah, yeah, do you what I mean? And so I think it sounds like you’re, you’re trying to re romance, like bring back the romance of the curiosity and not putting the aspect like, how does it any better than this? And in my head, I’m sending you universe very specific things that I want. And you’re getting back into that curiosity, space. And I think I’ve been there like I’ve been like, “Okay, I’m letting the universe like bring me what I want.” And like, “But this is what I want. (Joanna: Yes.) And I want it like right now.” Yeah.

Joanna Vargas
It’s so, it’s such like a whole other different realm. I’m going to call it of judgment because we are taught that judgment means to judge something in not a great light. Like I’m judging you that you’re not pretty. Okay. But that’s a judgment. But also saying somebody is pretty is a judgment, because all it means is that I am judging from my point of view of this is what I think. And so many times when we ask questions, we’re asking it with judgment attached to it, we’re asking left, right, it should be duo. And what if it’s infinite? Like infinite, infinite, infinite. And I can feel it now, I’m aware of it Lesley, when I’m asking from left or right of, how does it get better, good or bad? As opposed to, how does it get better infinite and genuine curiosity? I was curious before but like, this is a whole new realm of curiosity.

Lesley Logan
Well, let me think like, what I like about this also is that like, I think a lot of people could pigeonhole themselves. Like, I’m the this person, you’re the question, girl. I’m the Be It girl, I like this. And it can make us feel like we can’t explore and expand into other things. But there’s another realm, as you mentioned, and I want to go back because you mentioned the good or bad, and how does it get any better than this? I mean, sometimes we have to take like it’s going to be, it’s going to feel like shit to get better. Like, we have to, we have to rip things away to, if you remove things from our life to get to the next thing, like I can think of like people who’ve had gone through divorce, but now they’re with the best person ever. Like, if they hadn’t had that then if they hadn’t had that bad thing happened to them, they wouldn’t be with the person that they’re with now, or jobs, like losing a job that you loved, or a thing that you had. And then now you’re in this next level, you wouldn’t you can’t have both. So I think it’s, I think you’re right. I think it’s really easy for us to judge things as good or bad. And it’s, and it can just be what it is, and that it’s setting us up for the next thing. It’s very interesting. There was a, there was a time, and Gretchen Rubin was sharing. I really wish I could remember the whole story, which episode it was, it was years ago, but I can remember myself driving down the street on sunset listening to the story. And the story went like, somebody’s kid was supposed to go on a field trip, and they broke their arm. And someone goes, “Oh my God, I’m so sorry. She can’t go. That sucks so much.” Like, “Does it? How do we know it’s bad?” And then, of course, on the camping trip that she missed, there was a car accident, some kids got hurt and like, “Oh, my God, and she’s so glad that she wasn’t there.” It’s like, I don’t, I don’t actually, how do we know that that was better that she wasn’t there? Like this, this whole idea that we keep going, “Oh my God, thank goodness… that didn’t happen to you.” Or “Oh, that sucks that that happened to you.” It’s like, there’s a reason why it’s happening and it may not be bad or good. It could actually just be what it is.

Joanna Vargas
Yeah, like going, I love that that you brought that up, Lesley because that’s where I’m playing right now, is I’m training my body. Just like in Pilates, just like in fitness, we train our muscles, and we build them. So right now I’m building the muscle of light or heavy, light or heavy. So I’ll ask my body. Let’s say for example, I’m between two choices. We always have infinite choice. But what if you have two choices in your business you’re like, “Do I go with this vendor? Or do I go with this vendor?” And you can go back and forth with pros and cons and research etc, etc. And what if you just ask, “Alright, truth if I go with this vendor will it create more for my life? Or will it create less for my life.” And your body is going to give you like a light or heavy. Okay truth, if I go with this vendor is it going to create my life or not… or create less for my life? Yes, no. Yes, no. So I’m trying to work on just going yes, no. Yes, no. Give me a yes. Give me a no. Give me a yes. Give me a no. Because I’m re training myself and when I was a young girl of when I was taught, you don’t know. You have to ask adults for the answer. We know everything for you. And I’m here to tell you, you know, you know, we have so much power for our lives, we know so much. But it’s re training ourselves again to know. So I’ll just ask, “If I go with this, will it create my future? If I go with them, will it decay my future?” And I’ll just get a yes or no. And then what happens Lesley is all hear the little voice of like, “Yeah, but. Yeah, but.” And the next question is, “Is that mine?” (Lesley: Mmmm) Different types of questions from the, “How does it get any better than this? Is that mine?” Because most of our thoughts, feelings and emotions they are not ours. We’re picking up other people’s stuff. All the time.

Lesley Logan
You are, you couldn’t be more correct on that. And it’s because I think like I think even when I I want to change my schedule and Brad’s like, “Oh my God.” Aren’t you worried about your clients, like not liking it. And I said, “No. I need to change my schedule. I can’t do this schedule anymore.” And I remember him saying that and I remember thinking another time, I need to change something and hit that question came up and it’s not him. Like whatever that question was, was someone else’s question that came through. Right. But like I remember going, “Oh, that’s not mine. I actually don’t worry when I changed my schedule.” Like, I know that I will show it better if I do the schedule that feels good to me. And I think for people listening might be like, “How do I feel it’s my body.” I’ll, I’ll tell you a story and maybe you have a another way. Our friend Kareen Walsh, you know, Kareen. (Joanna: Yeah.) Yeah. So she, y’all, she was one of the episodes I don’t remember probably in the tens. But she, I was out with her in Scottsdale, and I was drinking my AG 1. They don’t sponsor the show, but I was drinking it. And she’s like, “Oh, I’ve always wanted to try that but I was afraid like, I don’t know, if my like how will feel in my body.” So I gave her my bottle of of it and she held it and she closed her eyes. And she just let her body like lean into it or away from it. And she’s like, “Oh, I think my body will like that.” And so, in that moment, I was like, “Oh, that is…” She is listening to her body in that moment. She is feeling what it feels like. And I think a lot of us try to answer the question up here in our head, just like you were saying, and, and to actually be the question, to feel the question to go inward. You’re correct. A lot of us have all the answers we need inside of us even if the answer is go ask so and so.

Joanna Vargas
Yes, yes. Yeah. It’s just just like that movie. What is it? When she has the red shoes. What is it? Wi…

Lesley Logan
Oh, The Wizard of Oz. Yeah.

Joanna Vargas
At the end of the movie. She says you’ve always had the you’ve always, whatever the fairy (Lesley: Yeah.) godmother says, (Lesley: Yeah.) you’ve always had the answers, you’ve always known the way

Lesley Logan
You’ve always had the way to get home, already.

Joanna Vargas
… For each and every one of us. You know, I do want to tell a story. I was in Arizona talking about Scottsdale, Lindsey Swartz, shout out to our girl Lindsey. And it was a great event. And I was at the VIP party the night before. And I’ve been playing with this next question. It’s my favorite right now as we speak in real time, and it’s universe show me what my reality. What’s my reality? Show me my reality. What’s my reality? Because right now I have so many thoughts, feelings and emotions coming at me front left, you know all of us that say, “Oh, that little voice that says this.” Is that your voice, is that somebody else’s voice. It’s not your voice. But we are taught that it’s our voice. And we’re listening to ourselves. So I’m like, “That’s not my voice.” So where I am right now, Lesley is like, there’s so much in my head. I don’t even know what’s mine anymore. I can’t see. It’s like, I’m in this hoarder’s house and there’s just books and crap everywhere. And I’m like, “I can’t even see my house right now. So show me what my house is. Show me what my reality is.” So I’m at her VIP event. It’s Friday, the night before. There’s about 200 women there. We’re all in our PJs. It’s like this PJ girls night out. And I walk in, and I hear a DJ playing music and you know me, I love music. And I’m like, “What?” So I start to walk over to the DJ, and I see this DJ playing music and nobody’s dancing. Right. And she’s playing like Beyonce, and like Bad Bunny. I mean, just all like the fun jams. And there’s about 10 other booths there, you could take photos, you can get your hair curled, you can get your nails done, like all kinds of Pajama party type things …

Lesley Logan
So fun. I want to go to that VIP party.

Joanna Vargas
So fun. And I start dancing. Everybody is in line to do the nails, to do the hair. I start dancing, and I’m all by myself dancing. I get there at 6:30 and the party is for two hours until 8:30. And I’m dancing out there. And then all of a sudden I get that … feeling you know that like … Everybody’s looking at me. Oh my gosh. Okay, what am I going to keep dancing? Am I going to keep being this weirdo out here all by myself. And the thing is, this DJ was so happy that I was dancing to her music because she’s an artist and she’s like, “Gosh, finally somebody’s I’m here for all of you. But all of you are all out, you know, getting your nails done and things like that.” (Lesley: Yeah.) So I kept asking for two hours Lesley, I kept checking in, “Universe show me my reality. Show me my reality. Because right now I want to get off the dance floor because I feel like everybody’s looking at me.” One out of 200 girls is dancing, right? And I kept getting, Joanna dance. This is your reality. Your reality is you don’t care if everybody’s looking at you. You don’t care if people are videotaping you. That’s your reality. Now, when you get embarrassed, if you feel like everybody’s looking at you, thinking that you’re drunk, like I thought, “Oh my God, everybody’s think I’m drunk.” Like I’m that drunk girl dancing all night. Right. And I’m like, can I receive the judgment? And I kept getting, yes. So I kept asking, show me my reality. And I kept getting, dance dance. So I danced Lesley, no joke from 6:30 to 8:30. I did not stop once. I was that crazy girl that dance two hours. I was totally sweating. I never went to any other of the booths. Now I’m telling the story because I was so aware that more women wanted to dance. I was aware of it that they wanted to, like they were passing me and going, “Oh my gosh, you look like you having so much fun.” And I would grab their hand like, “Come dance with me.” And they’re like, “No.” It wasn’t their reality. It’s I know, as young children as two three year olds, we’re bouncing up in our diapers. It’s like, you see little kids and they’re on Instagram, little videos, they are on (Lesley: Yeah.) TikTok videos and parents are like, “Oh my God, they’re so cute.” But something happens because we buy other people’s thoughts, feelings and emotions of, “Oh my God, I’m embarrassed. What are people gonna think? I don’t know how to dance.” Story after story after story. And I kept going through that same story, as I’m on the dance floor. “Oh, my gosh, I’m going to be in so many photos.” I mean, all this stuff of these voices. And I’m like, “This is not my reality. Show me my reality.” And my reality was not going to get my nails done. My reality was not going to curl my … I’m like, “I can curl my hair anytime. I have a curling iron. I got my nails done.”

Lesley Logan
Yeah. I’m not gonna curl my hair before I go to bed.

Joanna Vargas
Yeah. I’m like, “So is this, what is it Joanna? What is it really?” As I’m dancing on, as I’m being the question, the energy of the question, and I just kept getting, keep dancing, keep dancing. I’m like, Okay, keep dancing. Be the invitation for people. And at the end of those two hours, one of the girls that I know, she came up to me, and she was like, she hasn’t seen me in a year, two years since the pandemic. She’s like, “Joanna, oh, my gosh, I haven’t seen you.” She’s like, “I want you to come and be my host of my event.” And it’s this Saturday as we speak. So do you see what was created from me dancing like a crazy person? I mean, in this reality, I was the crazy person. But you get what I mean, (Lesley: Yeah.) like you that I was totally sober. I was out there, sweating crazy. But my reality was, “Joanna, keep choosing this, keep choosing this, keep choosing this because something great is out there.” And I kept asking, “How does it get better? What else is possible?” Along with all the other questions, and boom, and I know there’s something there. I don’t know what it is yet. I don’t want to make a conclusion, Lesley, like, “Oh, my God, I’m going to I’m doing this event. And this is the rest of my life.” I just know something is going to be created. I could feel it, I could get the (Lesley: Yeah.) goosebumps, right from this event. And I’m speaking there this Saturday, and I’m so freaking excited. I’m going to be on the mic hosting a large entrepreneur event from (Lesley: It’s insane.) a question that I kept asking. So this is what can be created. Now Lesley, if I would have written down a million gazillion trillion possibilities that could have happened, I would have never written down, I’m going to be hosting an event from …

Lesley Logan
Right, right. No. And so I love this, because I think a lot of people like okay, I just need to meet this person. And then they’ll invite me to this area. I network with this person and it’s like, you, you were at a networking event. So yes, you do need to be put in the room. But you don’t actually have to, like, “What am I going to say? How do I get them to do this?” You just have to be yourself, you have to be in, you have to listen to what your what you’re being called to do. And it might be in your instance, it was to dance the whole time and just have a really good time being yourself. And for others, it could be like literally just introducing yourself to the person that you’re so scared to say hi to, like, just say hi to them. And like, you know, but listening to your body. And I think that’s really cool that you just kept checking in with yourself. I don’t think people know how to do that as often. I think it’s very it was is it when you started doing this? Was it really comfortable to ask yourself these questions? Or was it like uncomfortable like, “This is weird, I’m talking to myself a lot.”

Joanna Vargas
It was really uncomfortable because this is a new tool that I’m using is, universal, show me my reality. So this is the first time that I actually was that tool for two hours straight. I’ve been using it like here and there. I have an alarm that goes up on my phone to kind of remind myself, but this is the first time and I totally know what you’re saying, Lesley, because I’m not saying that everybody needs to dance. What I’m saying is to check in, “What’s my reality?” Maybe your reality is getting your hair done, when you wouldn’t normally get your hair done. Or maybe your reality is leaving earlier. Maybe your reality is talking to the person next to you, you know, and so I also use that tool because I went early to the event, and I didn’t know anybody. And I could feel that I was shrinking Lesley, like standing in the corner. Like I don’t know anybody. And I kept asking, show me my reality. And what I got Lesley was, “walk up to these girls”. Okay, so I walked up to three girls talking, and I would just insert myself in the conversation. That’s not highly like me. But it is though. It is me. It is my reality.

Lesley Logan
… feels like you though, that feels like the Joanna I know. But I understand, well, I understand after a couple of years of not being around people, a couple of years of not doing the things that you normally do. It’s not like, and also in a lot of things we change, especially in the last couple of years. I’ve changed a lot of ways and I also didn’t change in a lot of ways. But I can see how like outside of that consistent environment of going up to people. And then finally going like, “Is this what I do? I do do this. Oh, I did …” Like you know what I mean? And then you just didn’t and you’re like, this is not me. You’re like actually this is me because this feels really good while I’m doing this right now.

Joanna Vargas
Yeah. Actually, this is me, but I was going into the other thoughts I’ve heard the, “Oh, you don’t know them. They’re already talking. It’s going to be rude to jump in.” Like all that stuff in my head. I’m like, I just inserted myself like a five year old on a playground in kindergarten, (Lesley: Yeah.) “Hi, do you want to be my friend?” It was just like that. And (Lesley: Yeah.) I walked up and I was like, “Oh, I’m gonna get a drink. Does anybody want to go with me?” And again, I probably would have just talked and see if they were going to ask me to go for a drink. But for me to be the ins… that’s not my default, so to speak, I’ll do it. But … (Lesley: Yeah.) my default, and but I kept checking in and one of the girls was like, “Yeah, let’s go get a drink.” So went over there had a drink with her. But what was created, it just kept going from A, B, C, and it just kept going, going from probably, I pro… what I wanted to do what felt comfortable Lesley was to sit on one of the couches there at the hotel and check my phone, that felt comfortable. I had to check my email, I gotta check. You know, I couldn’t use that as an excuse, as a as a reason that I am not talking to people.

Lesley Logan
That is … and also like, what if you, what like just going back to something where you’re like, “That’s not really who I am. So I don’t know what I normally do.” But what if that is who you are you just haven’t been doing that?

Joanna Vargas
Yes. Because that’s like, show me my it’s like the hoarder house again, I know where I live, I just can’t see it right now. I know who I am. I am that person that just walks up to people and “Hi.” But I can’t see it right now because all the other stuff in my head all the cobwebs of these voices and things and like, “It’s not mine. It’s not mine. Joanna, there’s 200 women in here that all feel nervous. So you’re picking up their nervousness, too. It’s not yours.”

Lesley Logan
Oh, yeah. No, it also I’m just so grateful that you’re here because I think you’re in, we’re always in process, you know, and it’s easy for me to bring on guests and for people to share their strengths. And share what they’re going in, like, they sound like they have it all together. And for and then certain compartments, they have it all together and certain compartments. I have most of it together. You know, but I also think that like, when, like, there is a process. So for example, I used to do a morning pep talk on my Instagram stories every morning. Like I probably did it for a year, every morning, rarely missed, just like reminding people something. And then one morning, I was just like, “I just don’t want to do it today, … don’t want to do today.” And then I was like, “Let’s do it tomorrow.” And then I like the … I was just like, “I’m not doing that.” And then all of a sudden, I was like, “When was the last time I fucking did that?” Like, I just forgot that. And then I was like, “Oh, I wonder I wonder if I should do that again.” And I just was like, “Hey, guys, I haven’t done this in a while. I don’t really want to do it right now. I’m going to do it a different time. Because I’m just feeling into like what I want my new morning to be.” And my new morning is very much asking myself every day like, because I like to get my Pilates every day. I like to get my meditation in at some point every day. And I was trying to always fit it in the morning. And now I’m like, actually, I could probably fit in things drift in different times of the day. So what if I just asked myself this morning, this morning, “Okay, I don’t have another meeting till this time. I want to get these things in. I’m gonna do them right now. I’m gonna do this right now.” And so I’m like, I’ll just check, I’m gonna give him their pep talks a different times a day, and it’s gonna be okay. It’s gonna be amazing. It’s gonna be find and no one has ever said, “You bitch. You used to be my morning pep talk.” They didn’t say that. But like, the stories we can tell ourselves like, “I have to do it because I’ve always done it.” And it’s like, yeah, if people are have a membership that you’ve, they’ve paid you for, you should probably keep doing what they paid for, until you can like, exit that out. But other things we can change the morning things that we do, we can change the that we maybe you were the sourdough person in your neighborhood and you’re not anymore. And that’s, it’s okay. And I know we tell ourselves, “Oh my God, I’m a lot of these people down. And this this.” Actually, they’ll get sourdough from someone else. (Lesley laughs)

Joanna Vargas
I’m laughing because it’s so light. That is so true in my world. I did this morning, 30 day challenge for 10 months, and I was going to do it for one year straight. And it was I really loved those 10 months. They were so much fun. And one day I just the next month started I’m like, “I don’t want to do it.” It was so much like a five year old kid, like, “I don’t want to do soccer anymore, Mom. I don’t want to dance.” You know, when they come home and they’re like, “I’m done.” And the mom’s like, “What? I just paid for?” And I’m like, “I just don’t want to do it. I’m just done.” And I might go back to it and I may not. And I’m still there with you, Lesley of the eye, it worked for me at that time. And I’m not saying that I may not go who knows what else is possible, I wonder. But as of right now, I’m choosing as I go kind of like minute by minute. I don’t it’s (Lesley: Yeah.) not as rigid anymore.

Lesley Logan
Joanna I love that. And I also think like when was that wrong to not be a five year old whose was like, “Oh, I don’t want to do that right now.” Like when did we feel like we… I mean I I understand y’all have to go to fucking work and you don’t want to go to work. Okay, like we have jobs, okay. But when it comes to certain things, we put a lot of pressure on ourselves around, especially like the timeline of things like we’ll have a lot of listeners who like trying to put something together. There’s a lot of pressure around, launching it, getting it going, getting it out there. And it’s like, yeah, you got to make some money. So we got to figure this out. But it’s okay if you’re like, you know, this was a goal of mine and I don’t want to do it anymore.

Joanna Vargas
Yeah, I do want to tap on something that has changed my life. And it’s the term, choice creates awareness. And what we were taught that awareness creates choice. So I’m gonna explain it this way. Kids make a choice, then they discover that they may or may not like it, and that they have awareness. Then they go, “Oh, I don’t want to do it any more because I did it. Tried it. I don’t like it, or I just don’t like it anymore right now.” But we were taught from adults that it’s no awareness creates choice, for example, you’re supposed to know that’s why you’re supposed to research pros and cons everything before. And then once you have the answer, which I’ve talked about answer or just limited possibilities, then you make a choice. And I’m actually here to say it’s actually backwards. It’s the way five year olds do it. Make a choice. And the difference also, Lesley is we’ve misconstrued the word choice with decision. And decision means till death do you part forever and ever. I have to do this morning inspiration and I’m doing on my Instagram forever, kind of that feeling. (Lesley: Yeah.) And that’s where we have the, what are you going to major in and high college? Who you going to marry? What do you get? It’s like, forever these decisions and choices only good for a small amount of seconds.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, like I’m choosing to have lunch today at two o’clock. And like, you know, like, it’s and I and I can go oh, can become aware. Actually, I really enjoy lunch at this time. That’s fucking amazing. (Joanna: Yeah, you might go …) or no, never doing that again, that was too late for me.

Joanna Vargas
You might say, I’m gonna have … okay, it’s 1:30. And you might say, I’m gonna have lunch at two o’clock. And once you say out loud, I’m gonna have lunch at two o’clock. That’s choice, and then you might, no actually I want to do it at 2:30. And are you willing, though, for the people around you to call you flighty though? But in this reality, it’s called flighty, if you change your mind. And I train my employees that work with me, I’m like, look, I run my business on choice and awareness. I don’t run it on decisions and conclusions. So if you’re a conclusion girl where you need everything, like cement before, this is probably not going to be a great working relationship, because I do in this reality changed my mind a lot. And it’s because I make choices than I have more awareness. I make a choice and I have more awareness. I make a choice that I’ll have more awareness. From Monday to Friday, the thing looks completely different because I keep having more awareness.

Lesley Logan
Yeah. Well, and also, because, first of all, I think what’s interesting here, though, is everything we do, we can guesstimate what the outcome is going to be. Right. Like I’m with, I’m like, “Okay, I’m going to, I’m going to make these flashcards and we’re going to sell this many,” and those are like guesstimations. Because I, you know, have to have some sort of plan, right? And then the cards get made, I put them out there, and I get feedback on those things. If I don’t listen to that feedback, if I don’t look at how people are talking about them, how they’re using them, how they’re playing with them. And I only keep selling them the way I had planned. I could either, I could … I’ll most likely miss out on so much possibility. And so is I hate that it’s flighty, because it’s more to me, like you’re reading the room, and you’re taking in the information and you’re making another choice, taking the information and making another choice. And the reality is, is like none of us are psychic. So you can have a great idea. And if you all if you’re like this is the plan I created in cement, and I’m just going to keep going. You could miss out on an amazing journey. And like the actual thing working out like a lot of things I think don’t work out because people don’t make another choice to change direction or make a left turn over here. Add this thing in over here. Am I making sense? That makes sense?

Joanna Vargas
Totally makes sense. Because what I’m getting from that is like, I made this choice, it’s not working, so now I’m wrong. I made the wrong choice. And you can’t make a wrong choice. Like you just can’t, I’m here to tell you but you can’t make a wrong choice because that goes back to the judgment of “this is wrong, this is right”. Because what if making those cards you’re asking the questions, “How does it get better yet any better? I wonder what these cards are going to create for people. I wonder what these cards are going to create for my business.” And you put the cards out and they’re not that great or there’s misspellings or whatever. But I wonder by putting those cards out what if something was created from there that doesn’t have to be about the cards. What it is something else? What about putting those cards out there Joe Blow sees it, Joe Blow calls you and says I would like to do X Y Z with you that has nothing to do with Pilates. But because these cards were a failure or they’re wrong, but it created something because you got the awareness to put these cards out there. (Lesley: Yeah.) And that’s where I want to flip it. What if (Lesley: Yeah.) everything is the opposite like the matrix … (Lesley laughs) the cards. You know

Lesley Logan
Oh, my God you’re speaking Brad’s … language now. Yeah, I I’m really I’m really intrigued by this. And I think, I think every single person listening to be it till you see it, to have what you want. You can not think like, it’s Humble the Poet, we are not concrete, we are constructs. And so we, in order for you to continue to grow, you have to be paying attention like, “Oh, oh, I made this choice. Oh, okay, that’s interesting that happened. Okay, I’ll make this choice because of that. Okay, I’ll just this do this.” And so instead of going, “Nope, I said, I was going to do it on this date, it’s going to happen,” like you do live events. Like, if there is a fire the day before morning, the day before your race, you’re not gonna be like, “Well, we said the run was today, everyone paid for today.” No, their fucking health is not gonna be able to run today, they’re gonna have to run next week when the fire is out. And like everyone just had, that’s how we had to all do it during the pandemic. And we somehow got so tired of everything, pivoting all the time that we’re like, everything has to happen when it says, everything has to happen when we set because we have to just like, you know what I mean?

Joanna Vargas
Yeah, oh, because like, I want to talk about business if there’s, I think (Lesley: Yeah.) there’s a lot of business owners, right that listening … (Lesley: Yeah.) podcast. I’m going to give this example, I’m producing these events this past summer, and I produced four of them. And they were parties, they were like 90s parties, 80s parties. And it felt very heavy. It didn’t feel like it was the right time yet to make the the itinerary for the event. Now my team’s like, “Joanna, the events this Friday. What’s the itinerary?” And I’m like, “Just be with me right now because I’m going to make one choice.” And I said, “The choice right now is I’m going to call, you know, Greg Smith, and I’m going to let me talk to Greg Smith, and I’ll call you back.” They’re like, “Okay.” Because I just needed to make one small choice. So it talked to Greg Smith on the phone, I got more awareness. And then that led me to the next thing, to the next person to call. And then that choice ment, led me to more awareness. And I kept changing the awareness. And even to the day before Lesley, I changed the whole itinerary. And I gotta tell you, that event was the most fun event, everybody that left there was like, “That was the best event ever.” And I kept asking, and I kept getting curious. But if I would have stayed with the same itinerary that was on the copy of the Facebook event, from Monday until Friday, I don’t think we would have had the same party. And again, (Lesely: Yeah.) it goes back to are you willing to be the person that people are like, “Oh, gosh, Joanna keeps changing her mind.” I think that’s the biggest question. Are you willing to be that different? Because if (Lesley: Yeah.) you’re not, then you’re going to stick with that plan. And it might be so much juicier or and then you DM me on Instagram and go, “Joanna, these questions aren’t working.” And I’m like, “Yeah, but are you really being the question? You’re asking the question, but then yet you’re still making decisions and not making choice and following the awareness.”

Lesley Logan
Do you remember the magic eight balls? (Joanna: Yeah.) You’re like, ask her a question and then like, you were like, you were like telling it what answer to give you. Right. Like you’re like, and I went to give you not the answer. And you’re like, (Joanna: Yep.) shake it again until you got the answer. And like, that’s what I’m hearing you say. And I think the other thing that I’m hearing you say is like, choice is actually just a different word for like, taking action. And action brings clarity, and action is the antidote to fear. And so if you’re like, these choice things is confusing. It’s like, all she’s saying is take one action, and then see what you find out from that action, and then take another step. And then another step. And so instead of trying to, I think what also with decisions, people are trying to plan out all the steps to the journey, they’re like trying to make the roadmap to go from here to wherever they’re trying to grow in their business or in their life. It’s like those girls in college who like wrote down their entire like itinerary of a husband and I was like, “Good luck with that. That list is long.” You know, but like before they ever dated it’s like you’ve ever dated, you even know if you like this about someone, you’ve never even gone on a date. So go on a date and see if you actually like person who you know orders my dinner for me just feel that out first. So I think like the differences like perfection is like, I’m gonna make this decision and it’s gonna go this way and you’re saying, you’re, the way you’re being it, the way you’re being the question is like, no, I’m gonna I’m gonna work on taking action getting clarity, taking action, getting clarity, and it will it will become what it is because I’m being at right now in the moment. I mean, this can, doesn’t get more how’s it get better than this? Because this is so be it till you see it.

Joanna Vargas
How does it get better? Yeah. And you know what, I love that and I’m just, I’m being called to throw this in there because it is action, it is taking action. And there’s something about the word choice that rings for me, if it rings true for you, please take it if, if the word action rings true, great. Like, for me the word choice just rings different for me. (Lesley: It’s empowering.) Yeah, it’s a little different than, like, take action. Now, whatever works for you, please choose it. I like the word choice, like, “Oh, I got choice. I’m gonna make a choice. I’m gonna make a choice.” And when I change my diction, that way, something changes. And it helps me know that I know. And so I just wanted to throw that out there.

Lesley Logan
I also just think you need a new sticker. It’s like got choices. You know, like the got milk … (Joanna: You got a choice.) that choices. (Joanna: Yeah.) Yeah. (Joanna: Yes.) Oh, my gosh, Joanna, this is amazing. We’re going to take a brief break and find out how people can find you, follow you, be the question with you.

Joanna Vargas
Yep, please follow me on Instagram @joannavargasofficial, you can also go to joannavargas.co, .co and I have my own podcast as well. It’s called The Get Up Girl. And I always talk about this kind of stuff if you want different tricks, different tools that you’ve already heard the other stuff and you’re like, “I’m still hitting a wall.” That’s what that shows for.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, you’re y’all have to listen to The Get Up Girl. So fun. Just hit subscribe a lot of pop up on your in your feed just like you like to be a pot. And, and I you always have amazing conversations and unique outlooks. And I think it gives so many, it gives so much permission for people to not have the answer. You know, so yeah. Okay, you know, because you’re here from the first, the first episode, bold, executable, intrinsic, targeted action steps, targeted choices, people can take to be it till they see it. What do you have for us?

Joanna Vargas
Ah, all right, this is one of my faves. Make the demand of you and ask the universe. Because many times, Lesley, we get it backwards. We make the demand of the universe. And then we ask ourselves, and that’s I know, that’s also taking action, make the demand of yourself. There’s this like energetic shift when you make the demand, like, I’m going to make the demand of Joanna and make a choice. And then ask life universe. And when that happens, they work together. And things are able to be created in your life. So if you want to be it, make the demand of you. And that’s a whole other show right there. Because we could talk about that for a while. But if that rings true for you throw that on your phone as a reminder and say, “I make the demand of me today and choose for me.”

Lesley Logan
Yeah, yeah, it’s another way to prioritize ourselves first. Yeah. I love that. I love you so much. Thank you for being here. Everyone, how are you going to use what Joanna shared with in your life? How are you, how are you going to make choices? How are you going to get more clarity? How are you going to be the person who’s willing to change their mind? I want to know, Joanna’s gonna want to know. Make sure you tag Joanna, tag the @be_it_pod. Share this with a friend who is maybe stuck in a lot of decisions and and choices. And until next time, Be It Till You See It.

Joanna Vargas
Thank you.

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Lesley Logan
That’s all I’ve got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate this show and leave a review. And, follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over on IG at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us help others to BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!

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Lesley Logan
‘Be It Till You See It’ is a production of ‘As The Crows Fly Media’.

Brad Crowell
It’s written, produced, filmed and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our Associate Producer is Amanda Frattarelli.

Lesley Logan
Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.

Brad Crowell
Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan
Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can’t see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all video each week so you can.

Brad Crowell
And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each of our episodes so you can find them on our website. And, finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.