How Mindset Supports

Your Health

Ep. 171 with Johanna White

“Change your story and say it differently.”

Johanna White

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Bio

Johanna White is an award-winning graphic designer and visual branding strategist who designs premium brand identities that create impactful first impressions.

As the founder of Design By Jo Studio, she believes that if someone is the best at what they do, they deserve to look like it! For the past decade, she’s worked with individuals, startups and Fortune 200 brands worldwide, helping them to attract more raving fan clients than they know what to do with, and be as delightfully expensive as they deserve to be.

Johanna knows there’s no limit on success, and she proved it several years ago when she took life by the horns and started three companies within one year while battling a brain tumor. At a time when everyone else in her life was suggesting that she quit working and go on social security to cover medical bills, she chose to do the opposite and defy the odds. As a result, Johanna is now a “Dreamer Extraordinaire” for top performers, goal-oriented individuals, and brands.

Specializing in designing premium brand identities from start to finish, Johanna assists her clients in a large range of needs, from brand messaging to visual brand identities to premium custom websites that convert visitors into customers!

Clients have come to know and love Johanna for her ability to constantly expand their vision of what they are capable of, capture their true value in an aspirational personal brand that takes them from best kept business secret to brand name, and then cheer them on as they level up with new confidence and live up to their fullest potential.

Show Notes

What you believe matters. From a hopeless diagnosis to finding a way through a time of uncertainty, Johanna is a beacon of light for those struggling to find the things meant for them. You can find joy in the moment, you can tackle the fear, and healing is possible.

If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected]. Or leave a comment below!

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

  • It’s possible to show up as how you want to be perceived.
  • The difference from being unique
  • Why you should balance your confidence levels
  • How you connect to your ideal clientele
  • A brain tumors survivors story
  • Mindset tools for complete healing
  • Change your story, say it differently
  • The problem with searching for certainty
  • How you tackle fear for healing
  • How a pair of shoes can change your life

Episode References/Links:

Transcript

INTRODUCTION

Lesley Logan
Hey, Be It babes. I have one of the most amazing interviews for you to listen to, and it’s got two parts to it. So there’s gonna be some business be it till you see it stuff in here and then there’s going to be some help be it till you see it stuff in here. And I really do hope you listen to the whole thing. First of all, Johanna is going to become one of your besties for sure. So, Johanna White is our guest today. I met her through a Mastermind that we are in and I fell in love with her way of describing how she does her what her business is and how she does her life with that and then when I heard about what she did in her health for her be it till you see it story. I was like, “Oh my God, I have to have you on. We’re going to have enough time.” So we did, get it all in. But I’m going to have to have her back and Johanna and I want to know how this affects you. What your takeaways are? So please let us know. Definitely send a screenshot to your friend of course or just text it to a friend but if you can tell Johanna and I how this affected you. It would not only make our day but it would let us know that that that stories like this help you and if that is what helps you then I will have more stories like this. So, here is Johanna White.

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Lesley Logan
Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I’m Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I’ve trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it’s the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It’s a practice, not a perfect. Let’s get started.

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EPISODE

Lesley Logan
All right, Be It babes. I am really excited because when I met this woman, first of all her accessories were just, you know, top notch and you know how I am when it comes to jewelry and accessories and all the things and then of course she said all the things that I truly believe in when it comes to your brand and presenting yourself in the world. And so I couldn’t think of a better guest to have you hear about being it till you see it. Then Johanna White, who is just a gorgeous inside out and she has not only ways to talk about how she does it in her business, but also how she did it in her life. And I think we’re gonna have a fun conversation going back. So Johanna, will you tell everyone who you are and what (Johanna: Sure) you’re rocking at?

Johanna White
Absolutely. My name is Johanna White, and I am the best in the world at helping people who are really amazing at what they do, finally look as good as they are through High Impact branding and design so that they can magnetize their dream clients and opportunities and finally be as delightfully expensive as they deserve to be.

Lesley Logan
But just something I love that you say I love, Brad and I have like quoted you a few times on, it’s delightfully expensive, I guess our friend Johanna would say. So I’m wondering though, like, first of all, can we all just like, did everyone just catch that she said, I’m the best at this in the world. Like, I just like you’re such like it just flew off your tongue like no big, like, it’s just, it’s so awesome. And some so many people don’t even say that they’re like, “Oh, I do this.” And it’s like, “Oh, are you? Are you the best? Are you the number one? Are you the only one where you are?” Like, I love how you, you put that in there. Have you always been doing this role? Like what what got you into doing this? What was the path there?

Johanna White
Well, I have been on a winding road that has had a lot of moments of being it till I see it. But I have been doing first graphic design and then expanding into branding, and big picture branding, clarifying your message, creating badass, high impact visuals, and then building custom websites that turn visitors into customers for the last nine to 10 years, really is when I stepped off on that journey. Before that it was a little bit of everything. Like I just made my way through high school barely surviving no clue what I want to do, have a lot of hobbies, but not sure which one to turn to a career. I tried to go to college for training horses, because I loved and riden my entire life. But then when I went to school for it and turned it to a career, it totally burned me out. And I hated it. And I came home like well, I just totally struck out wasted time, wasted money. I’m gonna go bury myself in a small cave of shame and depression for about three years. And I spent that three years working floor covering installing tile, I can put in a mean kitchen backsplash.

Lesley Logan
Oh my God, what a journey. You’re like, “I’m gonna like train horses.” And then first of all, the fact that that was a burnout career who would have thought like everyone’s like, “I want to work with the animals.” And then, now you can like tile. That’s a skill set. So many people would want to have.

Johanna White
It is. But at that time, I did not know how to brand position myself. So I was just a commodity in any job that I did, and didn’t pay well. And I had to get up at 5am and it was freezing cold and would crack my hands. And I played violin and rode horses and did a lot of things with my hands. It was super painful. And it took though that pain to finally nudge me out of my self pity and my fear of failing again. And I went back to college a second time when I felt way too old for it. I wasn’t that old, but I was like 21 …

Lesley Logan
… you’re like, “Oh my God, I’m going back when people are graduating. Gosh, I’m such a failure.” But I say that like tongue in cheek because like, I think I remember switching my degree like my, whatever my degree was going to be in I guess your major, whatever it’s called. It’s been so long since I’ve been in college. And I like could not like for besides the money, like I like absolutely did not want to be graduating at 23.

Johanna White
I know. I know. I was like, “I’ll be so old. And I’m hanging out with these 17 year olds.” And oh, well, well, looking back I just laugh. And the fact that it took me even three years to work up the courage to go back because I didn’t want to be three years older and just graduating. (Lesley: Yeah) But that time was passing anyway. And so now it was even three years later. And that’s so second time though, I went back to school for graphic design, got really lucky to have a couple of professors who really instilled in me the love of all design, and also really taught me about having a reason for what you do, like great design should have a reason. And that gives it a powerful story. And that helps it communicate a message and, and it lessons in making the mundane, extraordinary, which those stuck with me a lot like for my clients. Even to this day, I’ll make these kickass luxury business cards, which is something that most people think is either not important in this digital age, nobody cares, or business cards or something that people throw away. And …

Lesley Logan
You have the best business card. I still have yours. It’s so nice.

Johanna White
Thank you. But that’s because I wanted to disrupt something that was old school, something that was considered non important. And in a digital world, give someone something that, you put it in their hand and they go, oh my God, and they pause what they’re doing, they stop and they pad it. And they look, it’s got gold edges, and it’s so thick and it feels like suede. And what is this? It’s like literally dripping gold. And, and I just, that was one of my first actual experiments in being it till I see it was I got tired of telling people, I could do premium branding for them, and decided it was time to just do it for myself (Lesley: Yeah) and show them as possible. But …

Lesley Logan
So so I love this because you’re, you’re … you’re basically going out and said, “I do premium branding. I do premium branding.” And people are like, “Okay, I’m looking at your stuff.” And not that, no, there’s no way you could look like anybody else’s stuff, but probably like it look like another brand new person site. And, you know, like, and so then you’re like, okay, let me let me do some that stands out a little bit. And then looks like the brand I want to be when my brand has been more established. So you took the steps there. So some people might say this, like, fake it till you make it. But I think it’s really important. You already were good at what you did. You already were wanting to work with these clients and had worked with clients. And that way, you’re just actually making a bigger statement to show that like, this is the route that I’m going to this is the way I want to be perceived in the world.

Johanna White
Yeah. So let’s hop back one step so that we didn’t leave them hanging in the past. And we’ll go back to the past because there’s a very important kick in the pants, be it till you see it moment that happened between college and today, which was a brain tumor that turned my world upside down, and ended up being the catalyst for me not graduating, and then going to get an agency job, but instead graduating, quitting my, like teeny tiny agency designed job and starting Design by Jo, which has brought us here, but but yes, in my business, when I decided that I was tired of having to explain why I was different than everyone else. Or what I could do, or why it was like I started to realize I was way under charging for services, and I got tired of explaining why it was worth it. And what made it different. And all of these things, I suddenly realized that it wasn’t enough to just know that I was worth more. And to be telling people that I was worth more, I had to show up as worth it in the world. And so I went all literal, be it till you see it, which I call brand positioning in the branding world. And I said, I, what can I do to my website to make it a premium experience? Just to be honest, what can I do to my photos to make them feel like they’re oozing luxury branding from their soul? And what can I do to myself as the owner of this business, to live as that person today? And so I did a couple of things that are super practical, and a couple of things that are super silly … super silly.

Lesley Logan
I love it. I love it. I think there’s that’s an equal balance.

Johanna White
Yeah, so I actually I started Design by Jo in 2014, right after the brain tumor diagnosis. But for the first like five years of it, I just ran it like every other design business, very middle of the road, very much a commodity, looked like everyone else, and acted like everyone else too. Like, you want a brand cool, tell me what it should look like and what you want on it and your favorite colors, and I’ll make it for you. (Lesley: Yeah) So I could make it really great, but not greater enough for it to be something that would change their life. What I (Lesley: Yeah) discovered was what they really needed was someone who could walk them through the whole process, help them with research, help them know what they should build their brand around, help them mind the content and the diamonds from their story, crafted into a message, turn it then that story into a picture that really is worth a thousand words. And and then tell that story and use those images to create a website that’s an experience that walks your your ideal audience through a journey.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, I think (Johanna: And …) I’m so sorry to cut you off. I think like because I, because I have done like branding experiences and I and for the people listening like, “I not, need a branding.” Don’t worry, we’re going into the brain tumor in a moment and that is going to be interesting for sure. But we had Hilary Hartling on who’s like, even if you’re you’re a brand, whether you have a business or not like you as a person are brand so like, pay attention to this, but it’s for whatever business you’re in, you can either do it the way that everyone does it and then just like try to figure out how to stand out amongst the rest. Or you can actually go, “How can I do it differently than everyone is doing it?” So that people have an experience with me that makes me stand out as the person I say, “I’m better than,” you know. So I think like, what’s cool is that so many people that you did is so cool, because so many people are like, oh, well, everybody has like, for example, Pilates world. Well, everyone has packages. So I’m not going to do this thing over here. Because you know what I mean, like, you’re like, well, where I live, everyone’s used to like, unlimited memberships. And you’re like, yes, everyone’s used to just hearing someone go to your colors. But like, what is this? And I’m like, how do I help you tell the story. So I think it, it’s scary to be different, but like, it makes the most sense if you want to have the life you want to have to be different than what everyone else was doing.

Johanna White
Yeah, and you will get more noes at first, you will get better yeses, but you will get more noes. And those noes leave room for the more and more ideal customers, clients audience, the more leveling up of who you’re working with. So my like, be it till you see it revelation was I was running around telling everybody, I’m different. And it wasn’t working, I needed to do something that anytime they landed on some part of my brand, it felt premium and luxury. And so I went out. And this was back when I was still barely paying the bills, like, I looked like a commodity and I got paid like a commodity. And I said, if I’m going to show up as luxury, then here’s what that Johanna looks like, acts like, and how she dresses. And so I went out and I bought this Hermes bracelet that was like a 10th of my annual salary. Surprise? (Lesley: Yeah) I bought these Louboutin heels. And I brought in my photographer and had gotten actually, I had those really cool business cards first made for this kind of launch. Like I knew I wanted to show up different. And then I planned a photoshoot around that card, I got these custom made nails with diamonds on them from this woman in LA. And we shot like, I found inspiration from luxury handbags and various things and how I wanted the lighting and we shot these photos, flung gold paint around the studio, did all this, I took three months off from taking any client work, I treated myself like my own client. And I said that I’m not going to be a victim of my circumstances anymore, or just accepting like, what comes to me or what has been. I’m going to pause, I’m going to choose who I want to be, and step into that nice room at. So I redid my website with the new photos, and I started like wearing the bracelet and wearing the shoes for interactions with people and just saying, what is one way that I can be this person today and feel like her now and I’m not advising people to go on a spending spree, fill up a bunch of credit cards and, like, fit in with the Joneses that wasn’t it at all. I could have rented the bracelet, (Lesley: Yeah) I could have borrowed it from a friend. But I needed to believe that I was going to become that person very soon. And that the price was going to be irrelevant. So from my mindset, I needed to do that thing. And …

Lesley Logan
Well. (Johanna: I did.) I’m so sorry. You did and like also like, um, I think it depends on like, what it is that you’re trying to be it till you see it, you know, like yours (Johanna: Yeah, yeah.) was like that was particular in it. And it made sense. And also like, we’ve all seen the people take pictures in front of like a random G Wagon in a parking lot and act like it’s theirs. And you’re like no, no, these are my things. And so I bought them. So they’re my things and it’s like completely in alignment. But I think like you could have probably there’s a couple clients, you probably got that maybe you could have gotten had you not done this brand name. Like there’s just there’s every once in awhile, like some unicorn client could like land in your lap. But then you would have been waiting to make some money from some clients to then like, prove yourself to be this thing instead of like what you did was like, “No, I am this thing. I’m going to be at right now. So what do I have to do to make sure that everything, every aspect of what you experience with me, makes you realize that I am that person now.” And I think that takes massive guts. First of all, I think being it till you see it always does. But that takes massive guts and also to like, pause your work so many people are trying to they have this like be it till you see it idea over here that they compartmentalize and then a 90% of the time they’re just like them, they’re just doing the other thing that they’re hoping to get rid of someday and it’s like you actually you can’t be two people you’re gonna go crazy. You have to go all in on the one thing and so that’s a really that’s really cool that you were able to do that.

Johanna White
You got to commit but the rewards are great. The day after I launched my new website which you very kindly said there’s no way It was terrible before, but it just literally looked like every other design portfolio and I would cringingly send people to it and say, “Look at my work, don’t look at the website.” Like, “I know, I’m telling you, I can do a good website for you. Don’t look at my website, just look at my work.” So if you ever feel embarrassed to send someone to your website, whether you’re a designer or any other industry, you may not realize that that is important, but you are communicating with less confidence when you do that, like you’re gonna show up as less proud of who you are. Because you know, they’re about to experience something that feels off based on what you are. So like, for me leveling at my website, level that my confidence as well. I was proud to send people. And the day after I launched it, I was in a coffee shop working away. And some guy came up randomly asked if he could borrow my power cable because he had a Mac also, and it was fine. I was like, “Yeah, sure, no problem.” He returns the cable in 30 minutes, he asked what I do, I give him my card. And he just goes, “Oh, wait here.” And he runs back to his computer. And Google’s me apparently, like, looks it up, finds my website comes running back over, he goes, “Oh my God, like your brand stopped being in my tracks. Clearly, you know, branding, and you know, luxury, and I need you to work for me. I need you to do some work on a project I’m on. Oh, by the way, I work for Google.”

Lesley Logan
Oh my God. That’s insane. That is insane.

Johanna White
So I can guarantee that had it been three months prior. And I had given him my old business card, which was like a little cool but not that much. He would have probably tucked it in his wallet. Thanks me for letting me borrow the power cable, walk back to his seat. But he said, “You get it. I need you right now.” And stuff like that started happening. I had people emailing me, they’d hear me on a podcast. And then they check out my website. And I’d get this long email saying, “I need branding and it has to be you because I saw the Louboutin on your website and the way you did this and like you get me.” (Lesley: Yeah) And it was me putting myself into the world of my ideal client. And yes, I was getting customers before because I was good at what I did. But I was spending way too much time working on projects that weren’t making that big of an impact, because those people weren’t aligned with what I could bring them. And when when I made the shift, I was able to go from charging, like $1,500 for a logo to 10,000 to 50,000 per brand package to 150,000 for brands and, and websites and like that quantum leaping in the types of clients I was able to work with and the types of service I was able to provide happened in the space of just a few months and then a few years like (Lesley: Yeah) so fast.

Lesley Logan
Well, because you’re also I mean, getting the referrals from the people at the level that you are trying to get at at the first place. So and you just like really stop people in your tracks. I think I’ve, while you’re saying this is thinking back, like when I first became a Pilates instructor, you know, I was a teacher on the Westside of LA. And I, I really couldn’t afford a bunch of Lululemon items, but I knew that like, all the clients that I’d be asking to pay me, that’s what they’d be wearing. And I’m trying to get them to invest in somebody that they don’t know that, you know, there’s like I’m brand new teacher so there’s no testimonials, there’s no referrals, there’s no anything. So how can I make them feel safe and seen as meet me as their teacher. So guess what? I budgeted everything out to where I could afford a new Lululemon outfit every paycheck, which is like freaking crazy. But as like, I’m gonna do this for a couple of months, so that I have enough that I can mix and match. So that I can like, be this person that they they see it at their level. Because these are people who I know I’m not a mom, so I don’t have that relate to them. But they are eating at these restaurants there. This is what they want to talk about. These are the restaurants that eat out, this is the things that they drive, this is the places that they go. I have to I have to crossover in some way so that they feel like I get them. And so I had to make that investment. And then I became the teacher who has all these clients on the Westside who could afford Lululemon or whatever I want whenever I want it. But though that was like how I had to do it so that people could stop me and go, “Where did you get that sweatshirt?” While I was out in the area where I wanted the client so I can start the conversation. So I fully resonate with the story. I think there’s different ways people can be it. I know. We’ll come back to all of these things with your business but I do have to say that I’m sure the listeners was like, “Okay, so tell us about … Are you okay with your brain tumor like what happened?” (Johanna: What the heck happened? You said brain tumor.) What’s going on?

Johanna White
Yes, so let’s rewind this story a little bit to really the first time that I learned to be it till I see it. And it was the moment that totally changed my life. And the reason I’m still here today. So I told you, I went back to school, finally, at the ripe old age of 23, or 24, graduated for the second time. And I was like, “This is it, it’s finally onward and upward. I’m going to move out of my parents basement, finally, and I’m gonna go find a job. It’s a massive agency in New York instead of this small one here.” And I was I was working at a design agency at the time, but it was very small, morale was super low, it was really like, the sky is always falling. And you never knew when you were gonna get fired, and there was really no ladder to climb, and (Lesley: So stressful.) so stressful. But I was convinced myself, I was just happy to have a job in design. And so I had worked my way through school at that job. And, but I graduate, it’s onward and upward. And then two weeks later, I was woke up in the middle of the night with a skull pounding migraine, which I had never really had a migraine in my life before. That and the migraine lasted for four days. (Lesley: Oh my gosh.) And it was so intense, I had to sleep in a closet, because even a little pinprick of light would make me vomit. And, but I just convinced myself that it was too much time in front of screens, or some logical explanation for why my head is killing me. But when the migraine finally went away, what was left its place was sudden partial paralysis down my left side.

Lesley Logan
Oh, my God, that’s so scary. You’re so young.

Johanna White
Yeah. I was I was very scared. And like, I’d kind of dealt with low grade anxiety for most of my childhood to begin with. So you dump this in there. And I’m panicking. (Lesley: Yeah) And it made muscles in my neck atrophy, I couldn’t raise my arm very high on the left side, I had, I couldn’t speak because the vocal cords were paralyzed. And the most frustrating symptom probably of all was food would not go down my throat. It came out my nose instead when I tried to swallow. And so we very quickly realized something major is wrong. And started going first we went to an ear, nose and throat, who said these are really weird symptoms, sent you to a neurologist, who then did CAT scans and MRIs. And I was it probably took a week or two, to dive through all that. And then I was at work, working second shift, still trying to deny that there’s anything really wrong with me. And I get a call from the doctor and he says we found a mass. And I immediately start asking, what does that mean? Am I going to die? What’s happening? Tell me more. And he’s like, we don’t really know, tumor … Right?

Lesley Logan
… we don’t know. You’re the brain doctor. You don’t know.

Johanna White
You said doctor, it’s a brain, surgeon doesn’t know, who knows. But that’s when I found out that at least certain types of tumors are as unique as snowflakes. And each one has different things about it. And so they don’t know. Plus doctors are often you know, they don’t want to tell you something and then have it be wrong. So of course over the phone, he’s not gonna tell me but …

Lesley Logan
Yeah. While you could be like driving or something.

Johanna White
Yeah, well, he, he did make sure I was not driving and while I was sitting down, but so my life came crashing down around me. And I went home, told my family prepared for whatever is going to happen next. I’m prepared to lick my wounds, prepared to tell everybody, I have this thing, prepared for this and that, but the next morning, thankfully, a really good friend of our families showed up on our porch. My dad had called him and said, like, “Hey, Doc, this is what’s happening.” And he was a chiropractor. He canceled all of his patients for the day he showed up on my porch, gave me an iPad Mini loaded with every Bible verse he had found on healing. And he said, “This is tools for the battle and we’re going to fight. Now grab your parents, we’re going for walk, we’re going to talk.” And (Lesley: Wow) before I had a chance to go tell my sob story and become this like girl with a brain tumor, I need help. (Lesley: Yeah) He he jumped in and said some things that I did not want to hear, but ended up being the most helpful things that I could I’ve heard at that time, which was, Johanna, you have said your whole life that you believe in God, and you believe in healing. But you’re not talking like it right now. And you’re not acting like it. So you get to choose how this story goes and hear at the beginning, before you start saying and repeating what the doctor said, is your chance to change your story and say it differently. (Lesley: Wow) And so he challenged me. And of course, I had all the like, “Well, yeah, I believe in healing. But I’ve known these people, and they believed in it too. And they died. And I saw this person, pray over this for forever, and they never got healed.” And he said, “Stop looking at anyone else. Their story is not your story. You don’t know what’s happening in their mind. You don’t know anything? And it does you no good focus on that. All you need to focus on is what you claim to believe, which is the Bible. And every verse in here that talks about healing says he heals all who asks. No exceptions. That’s what you need to focus on.” And so I tried, failed, tried failed, like …

Lesley Logan
All right, thank you for sharing that because it’s like it’s not, it’s like, it’s one thing to go yep. And then and then you can say it, and there’s going to be some dissonance, some days, because like, when you’re tired, it’s really hard to tell yourself motivating thing.

Johanna White
Yeah. And when your body is not doing what you want it to, and you’ve always been a really strong, really fit, healthy person. And all of a sudden, you’ve got pounding headaches, and you can’t work out and you can’t swallow and nothing seems to be helping. It’s really hard to keep saying, “I am healed, I will be healed, I believe that I will be healed.” But I accepted his challenge to the best of my ability. And I would play verses on healing while I slept, and just let it be in there. When I would be in so much pain that I’d wake up. I would just start pacing and speaking them out. And I was still terrified, of course, because it ended up being like a two year journey from neurosurgeon to neurosurgeon, each doing more MRIs, each saying the results are inconclusive, brain biopsy, we stuck a needle in your skull, we still don’t know the results are inconclusive. And so everything was so uncertain. (Lesley: Yeah) And I wanted certainty, even if it was certainty that I was gonna die in six months, at some moments that felt like a better thing than the results are inconclusive.

Lesley Logan
Right. Well, because it’s like, “Am I dying tomorrow? Do I have six months at least? Like what do I, what’s going on?” And, and, and I also my brain is like, “So how are you eating food, though?” Let’s talk on the not swallowing.

Johanna White
No. So so what happened was, I accepted my friend’s challenge to my faith very quickly. And I started standing on every verse I could. And if I couldn’t speak, I’d call my boyfriend at the time, or my parents, and they would speak them over me. And within weeks to month, like I didn’t really eat for about a month, and I just went down to skeletal. (Lesley: Yeah) But I would try, I try to like sip smoothies or little tiny things and get a little bit down before it would come up my nose. But that was the symptom I tackled first, and I just started, like speaking directly at it. And my symptoms started to get better. And even the doctors had said, like, a lot of this now is nerve damage, and it’ll be permanent. And even if we are able to remove the tumor, these symptoms will still remain. And I said, no, they won’t. Because it says that if I live by the flesh, I will die. But if I by the spirit, put to death, the misdeeds of the flesh, which are tumors totally a misdeed, my body was not meant to have this, then I will live. And I just kept saying that and my symptoms started getting better and better and better. And then I went to my first like, follow up MRI, and my symptoms are doing so much better than I’m expecting that they’ll say it’s smaller, (Lesley: Gone. Tumor is smaller.) gone. Yes, exactly. So my faith has grown as the symptoms have started to fade. And because I’ve been being it, and finally I’m starting to see it. And then they do that the scan and they come back they say, well, it’s the same. Or maybe it’s bigger. We’re not really sure we used a different machine. It’s still there. And in fact, here’s probably the next like five symptoms, you’re gonna experience. I mean your vision in your right eye and numbness in your face and you can put your jaw out and all of this stuff. And I went into that appointment full of hope and faith. And I left completely crushed because (Lesley: Yeah) now here was evidence that what I was is believing what isn’t working, at least what I thought like evidence on a piece heartful …

Lesley Logan
What you were judging was working? Like what would be working, even though like other things were getting better, like you wanted that (Johanna: Yep) to be the marker, even though like, it probably wasn’t the real marker that we should be paying. But yeah, I get you because …

Johanna White
Right. I wanted certainty. I wanted proof. I wanted to not sound like a crazy person saying I’m healed. But there’s an MRI over here somewhere saying I’m not. So I wanted all of those things. And I went into that appointment like this high and left down low, cried all the way home woke up the next morning with all of my symptoms back, plus some new ones. (Lesley: Oh, no.) And that is when I realized the insane power of our minds. (Lesley: Yeah) Because I knew that like, okay, sure, maybe there’s still some healing to go. But there’s no way that it all comes back overnight reverses, just because I found out (Lesley: Yeah) but it did. And so I, I mean, that was awful feeling, but also kind of hopeful because (Lesley: Yeah) I was like, wait a second, I have so much more power (Lesley: Yeah) over this situation than I think I do. And I went back at it full bore like, well, I’d be working, I’d be playing sermons in my ears, headphones, just in the background, because I knew that that fear, extreme anxiety was doubling the symptoms or making them worse, because I’d go from like, partially collapsed throat to fully choking on the bathroom floor when I would get anxious and think about it, the more I think about the tumor, the more that spot in my head would hurt. The more I’d think about it, the more I’d like symptoms would start to show up again, and the panic would accelerate it. And I said so after round two, I was like, “Okay, I don’t know yet for sure that I can tackle this tumor. But I know I can do something about the fear.” And clearly the fear is having a big, nasty impact on my outcome. So I’m going to do everything I can to drown out the fear, which is like, it doesn’t matter if it’s a health issue or a business thing, or your bank account isn’t showing up, like you want it to that fear as long as you’re still focusing on it, is holding back the healing and it’s (Lesley: Yeah) holding back the outcome and it’s holding back that physical, like appearance of what you’re going for.

Lesley Logan
Which is what fear does, no matter if it’s your health or anything, like fear just holds us back paralyzes and almost moves us backwards. It’s it’s it’s that powerful.

Johanna White
Yeah. Yeah. So I said, well, I’m going to tackle the fear first (Lesley: Yeah) if I can’t tackle the tumor.” And first I tried to just tell myself not to be afraid, like, “Johanna stop.” Yeah, you can imagine that worked real well.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, it’s like telling someone to calm down when they’re anxious. It’s like that this actually like, ignites it even more, you know?

Johanna White
Yeah, I couldn’t, I couldn’t just stop thinking about it. So I had to drown it out. So it became eight hours a day of listening to sermons, listening to Bible verses, reading everything I could on healing. I didn’t care who said it, or what it was. I just did it. And and as I did that, the fear started to fade. And the healing returned rapidly, like symptoms gone again. And the fear faded beyond what it had ever been in my entire life. Like I had been fairly anxious as a child, as I mentioned, for no good no reason, just like lived in low grade anxiety, even that faded. Because I dug into what am I actually afraid of? (Lesley: Yeah) I forced myself to sit down and ask myself, “Am I afraid of dying?” Well, no, when I think about it, there have been many days in all of this pain, I actually wished for death. I’m not afraid of dying. (Lesley: Yeah) I believe in God, and I know where I’m gonna go when I die. And I’m not actually afraid of dying, but what I am afraid of, is living with a lower quality of life (Lesley: Yeah) with with going from being fit, healthy, inactive, to maybe being in a wheelchair, or on a feeding tube, or die, whatever you think.

Lesley Logan
Having your left side disabled. Yeah, something like that.

Johanna White
And if that happened, I thought, then I won’t be happy. Because those things are what makes me happy being fit, running, jumping, riding my horse. That’s what makes me happy. And if it’s was gone, who will I be? But I realized, as I sat there, through the pain, that I could actually choose joy in the moment, no matter what was happening, and when I realized that joy was a choice and happiness was a choice, then there was nothing left to be afraid of, because it didn’t matter how bad life got or whether this worked or not or whether I ever became healed, I could still have joy. And if that’s all I was afraid of losing, then there’s nothing left to be afraid of. (Lesley: Yeah) And like that just melted, the last of the fear. And the healing just kept coming. And, you know, I’m maybe not the smartest crayon in the box, because I went back for another MRI six months later. And at that point, my body is glorious, functioning fully. Everything is back, muscles that they said would never return are back and stronger than ever. (Lesley: Amazing.) But I want certainty. I think that that’s the most important thing in life to never have to ever think about brain tumor again. And if some doctor can just chisel this thing out of me, (Lesley: Yeah) I’ll be good. (Lesley: Yeah) Even though it’s no longer affecting my life. And for all we know, it’s gone. (Lesley: Yeah) But I go back and find this surgeon who says, “Yeah, this no big deal. I can help you. I’ve worked in this particular area, a lot of times, it’ll be pretty low risk, just maybe a little bit of like, nerve damage on your jaw. And come back in three months, we’ll do the surgery.” So here I go, thinking I’m finally going to resolve this in the critical world.

Lesley Logan
Settled. The last part of it, and this ready to go.

Johanna White
Ready to go. And I show up three months later for this surgery. And they’ve got me prepped on the operating table, the anasist, ana…

Lesley Logan
Physiologist. (Johanna: Thank you.) Yeah, that’s a hard word. I can’t spell it.

Johanna White
And I apologize to all of them out there. But they’re, they’re ready to put me under and the doctor comes walking in carrying my MRIs and he looks at me goes, “I can’t do this surgery. I changed my mind.” And he says, “The risks are way high. It could put you in a in a feeding tube or in a wheelchair. And I can’t do that to an otherwise totally healthy person. So it doesn’t matter what your scan say, I won’t operate on you unless your symptoms are also like back to what they were.” We’re in … Yeah.

Lesley Logan
What I mean like, yes. And also like, what?

Johanna White
Aha. First the what, screamed and yelled and like you gotta be kidding me. (Lesley: Yeah) You couldn’t have, you couldn’t have looked at my charts like three days ago or three months ago, maybe and …

Lesley Logan
Yeah, like I’m here. I’m everything’s prepped (Johanna: I’m ready.) I’m taking the time.

Johanna White
… who cares if it kills me, just like I just want to be done. Which was I’m very grateful (Leslye: Yeah) that he risked his, like, reputation to say that.

Lesley Logan
I mean. It’s so amazing … (Johanna: But I was so mad.) listening, so amazing. And also like, like, of course, when we all want a doctor who’s actually like, no, actually, I could screw this up. So we’re not. I mean, like, bless him. But I understand like the devastation of like, because you plan like, okay, tomorrow, I’ll be healing (Johanna: Yeah) from this surgery. And now you’re like, “No. So, so what happened next?”

Johanna White
So I finally realized that it if they don’t care what the paper says, I have no reason at all to care what the paper says. And they want me to come back every six months and do like a watch and wait. And I was like, “Oh, heck no.” I, my faith has grown. But I don’t think it’s grown quite enough for me to come back every six months, and be scared to death again, and then have to recover. So I am drawing the battle lines. I’m taking a stand. I’m doing what I should have done a year and a half ago, which is say, “Lord, you have healed me. And I trust that. And I’m just going to walk the rest of the way into it.” And so when I stopped, like worrying about finally having some surgeon take the remnants out, the last of my symptoms faded away, and I haven’t been back in five years.

Lesley Logan
Wow. And you’ve been symptom free? (Johanna: Yeah) Our minds are so freakin powerful. Like, and by the way, y’all I’m not saying like don’t go to your western medicine and get things checked out. Like please … (Johanna: No …) there’s a combination here of like, massive faith in like what you’re capable of. And also, and also having things looked at and if these doctors had other things to say where they could actually fix it without damaging you, then you would have done that. But that wasn’t that’s not possible in your situation. I have a cousin who has a couple of tumors and like, they’re there, they’re there and they actually affect him in a not so fun way. But like, you can keep going and that’s what you’ve done. And if you make me think of, I think it’s episode three with Amy Ledin. You know, she’s had the diagnosis stage four cancer like four times now. And she keeps, she has her faith, she does the work. And then she also looks for evidence of people who’ve have survived what she’s doing, she looks for anything like proof that it’s (Johanna: Yeah) possible to survive. Like she had friends who were always looking at why did I get this? Why this happened to me? And I kept looking for the answer of why. And she focused only on that there’s a future for her. And, and she has survived many times over and the people that were always searching for the wy have passed from the cancer. So it is powerful. That is the ultimate be it till you see it, because it’s your life. And you’re still doing it today. And I mean, I’m so glad that you’re healthy and well. And, and also like, I think even on a even if you’re listening to me, like I don’t have a brain tumor, but I’ve got this pain here. It’s like, it’s not about telling yourself some that’s not true, but it’s about believing in the power that you have. And seeing how much can your mind, mindset support your health? (Johann: Yeah) You know, I think we … (Johanna: Sorry.) Oh, I just think we outsource a lot of our health to, to getting that certainty and we forget that we actually have a bit of a role in it that we could play.

Johanna White
A big one. I love what you said about Amy, I know her. And that collecting evidence is so important. That’s what my friend challenged me to do is like stop looking at all the things that didn’t work and focus on what did and collect that evidence. That’s what you need to focus on. And, and people there were some people who would say, “Johanna, you just need to accept this, you just need to like, brace yourself for the worst.” To what end? If I do that, I will definitely die. And I will definitely remain broken. But if I focus on ways that it can work, ways that I can be healed, and speak that out, there’s a really good chance I’m going to be. So I’m gonna go, I’m gonna go with that.

Lesley Logan
Yeah. Yeah. What seems to be working to?

Johanna White
Yes. And I think what I learned the most was what you believe matters. But what you do about what you believe, matters even more, so that’s why it matters to be it till you see it. Because it’s not enough to just whether it’s health, believe that you can be healed. But take no steps, speak nothing out, do no actions, tell no one. It’s not enough to for me with my business to, to believe that I could be so much more than I was. I could help so many more people that I was. I could work at such a greater level than I was. I had to step towards it and become that in order for it like I had, it wasn’t enough to believe it. I had to do something about what I believed (Lesley: Yeah) and, and that’s why I started Design by Jo. Like, shortly after the diagnosis, I looked around and saw just hopelessness. And if I didn’t know how much time I had left, I was definitely not going out like this. (Lesley: Yeah) Not going out leaving all of my potential on the table having never tried. But more importantly, I needed to believe that there was a Johanna, on the other side of this diagnosis. She was healthy, she was strong, she was successful. And I couldn’t wait two or three years in a pool of uncertainty to then recover from that and then try to go be successful. I needed to start something right now that was the future Johanna’s success. So I started Design by Jo and it didn’t take off super fast one because I was dealing with a brain tumor. But but two there’s just so much more for me to learn and so many things. If I knew this about business, when I started, I would be way further along than I am now.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, I think like, well, thank you. First of all, thank you for sharing your whole entire story. And also thank you for sharing that it, you know, there was a little bit of a learning curve in that because I think people will go, “Okay, y’all, I believe it. And I’m taking action. And it’s not I’m not getting the client yet or I’m not getting the thing yet. I’m not getting this.” It’s like yeah, but it’s like it’s a practice it’s a muscle, the being (Johanna: Yeah) it’s a muscle, that taking actions and muscle. And those ups and downs like you I want to go back to the beginning of the pod when you mentioned like you got a lot of noes. But then you got better yeses. And like those noes, teach us so much more about how we can be it till we see it, in the actions that we can take and how we put ourselves out there. Brad has a course called 200 re… like 200 rejections to success, because he’s like the go for 200 noes for sure by the time you hit 200 you probably have a full clientele like you probably do because so we have a mutual friend named Renee who has who will have on the pod soon who had 100 rejections on her book proposal, but she got one and with the best person. So I Johanna, I could talk to you for ever. Our coffee chats do always go over. So we’ll have to do this, we’ll have to have you come back, I’m sure. But before that we’re gonna take a brief break, find out where people can find you, follow you, work with you, and then also your BE IT action items.

All right, Johanna, where do people get to know you, get to talk to you more, work with you?

Johanna White
Well, first, you can visit my website, which is designbyjostudio.com. And just request a free console, let’s chat about who you are as a personal brand, or who you are as a business and where in your life, you’re, you find yourself just thinking you could be this and not actually being it, and how we can help you show up in the world. So that the whole world can see it, not just you. So let’s talk. You can also find me on social at @designbyjostudio, both on Facebook and Instagram.

Lesley Logan
Perfect. We’ll put all those in the show notes below. And you’re also going to want to tag, tag, tag Johanna and and the @be_it_pod with your takeaways for sure, because we want to, we want to know. All right, bold, executable, intrinsic, targeted steps people can take to be it till they see it, what do you have for us?

Johanna White
Well, they can buy the shoes. So whatever the, whatever the shoes represent in your life, figure out who that next you is, how would she act and by one small thing, or one big thing or something to become that now and a lot of times just taking that action shifts your mind and you you become that person. And then they can pay attention to how they are showing up in the world because it’s not just you who needs to see it. If you’re wanting to be something and you’re not that yet, you want the world to be able to see that and know you for it and love you for it as well. So talk, like look at your brand, whether you are a personal brand, you are part of an organization and you’re wanting to move up, or you are your own business. Like that is literally what I do is help people become in the world, but they have known and seen about themselves in real life. So talk to someone who digs branding, loves branding, it doesn’t have to be me. But don’t be afraid to get some help. (Lesley: Yeah) Because that can be one of the hardest things to discern about yourself, and to bring to life. But so many business owners struggle through it on their own. And they think, well, that, you know, branding is not my strong point. But I just gotta do what I can and put a band aid on it. And eventually I will show up in the world as this magnificent human that I am. But what happens is, branding is happening all the time, whether you do it on purpose, or on accident, it’s either happening by you, you’re building those perceptions on purpose, or it’s happening to you (Lesley: Yeah) by accident. And then what happens is you end up a couple years down the road with the visual brand that’s held together by duct tape and band aids. And it’s happened to you by default instead of by design. (Lesley: Yeah) And you look and you’re like oh, I didn’t work you collect your evidence that you didn’t become what you were seeing because you didn’t get intentional about it. (Lesley: Yeah) So get intentional about what you want to see and then start collecting that evidence like Lesley said earlier.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, I love I love that evidence collecting we we make people do it on Fridays it’s Fuck yeah, Friday and so you have to, you have to celebrate wins on Friday so that if you ever feel like nothing’s going right and look back at what you posted last Friday. Oh actually had a win last Friday. Oh actually now that I think about I had win this Friday. But I think intentionality is so important and I gotta be honest, like the buy the shoes thing is such a it’s the first time we’ve had it on the show and as the best advice because you put your feet in those shoes every day. And you will look at them where they are and you it’s like the it’s like a physical way of reminding yourself this is who I’m being right now. So yes to that… You make, I think I might go buy some shoes.

Johanna White
Do it and don’t hide them, don’t hide them in your frickin closet. I actually built a little platform on my dresser for my Louboutin and then you know built the little shelf for the first time I got the Louis Vuitton bag that was for a photoshoot and then became the next level and like, I just wanted to see that woman every time I walk into the room (Lesley: Yeah) not just wait till I’m going out. So

Lesley Logan
Oh my gosh, you’re such an inspiration. I freaking love that you’re in my life. Thank you for being here to share your story with our listeners. Y’all again, how are you going to use these in your life? Tag Johanna, tag to @be_it_pod. Share this with a friend. Whether it’s a friend who needs to be reminded how to be be it in their business or in their dreams or in their health. Both will, both will will win after listen to this episode. Thank you for being here Johanna and thank you for listening everyone. Until next time, Be It Till You See It.

Lesley Logan
That’s all I’ve got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate this show and leave a review. And, follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over on IG at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us help others to BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!

Lesley Logan
Be It Till You See It is a production of Bloom Podcast Network.

Brad Crowell
It’s written, produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan. And me Brad Crowell. Our associate producer is Amanda Frattarelli.

Lesley Logan
Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.

Brad Crowell
Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan
Special thanks to our designer Mesh Herico for creating all of our visuals, (which you can’t see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all the video each week, so you can.

Brad Crowell
And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each episode, so you can find it on our website. And finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

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