Realign Your Patterns

and Heal With Somatics

Ep. 175 with Keri Ford

“Fear doesn’t go away, we just learn to embrace it.”

Keri Ford

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Bio

Keri Ford is a High Performance Holistic Life Coach.

Keri is the CEO & Founder of Elevate with Keri – an elite transformational coaching movement and luxury brand dedicated to serving and elevating women’s emotional intelligence and whole-body high performance. Her unique online influence and programs have transformed the lives of thousands of women across the globe.

She is an international motivational speaker, author, event host and global authority. She has spoken alongside 50 other top industry experts, neuroscientists, doctors and authors in the personal development industry.

Keri’s high-end clientele includes some of the world’s top female CEOs of multi-million dollar companies, self-made millionaires and other influential public figures.

She also has advanced training as a Behavior Change Specialist and was awarded by IFAH as one of the Top 100 Global Visionaries.

Keri has been featured around the world on Entrepreneur.com, The Huffington Post, SELF.com, NBC, USA Today, Livestrong, and other major publications.
She is also the co-creator of a nearly million dollar company, Shift with Sanctuary – the #1 Inner Circle Experience for The 1% Woman. Keri’s mission is to help women define success on their terms and lead leaders into a life they love through transformational practices.

Show Notes

Create more love, compassion, and confidence. Allow the big emotions into your home and change your life path all with somatics. Listen in to learn how to leap over the mountain, stop dancing on the edge, and become the women you are truly meant to be.

If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected]. Or leave a comment below!

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

  • Why somatic coaching is different than therapy
  • Flip the script
  • Thinking vs feeling mindset
  • How you use somatics to become the person you want to be
  • How can you expand and balance your risk tolerance?
  • Shifting patterns by recognizing mirroring neurons
  • How to nurture and support big emotions
  • Becoming the 1% woman

Episode References/Links:

Transcript

INTRODUCTION

Lesley Logan
Hey loves. Okay, I am so excited for us to have another conversation around somatics. And also, I love the way that our guests this week really explains how you can actually implement it in your life and how you can actually help others around you. I think there’s some really great gems in here that I you’re gonna want to write down. There’s also some amazing permission in this episode. So Keri Ford is our guest this week, and you’re gonna hear how I met her and this life and I’m just so excited after we got off the podcast. We plan our next trips, and I share that with you because y’all life gets really busy. It’s actually always busy. And people are always busy. And so those people that mean something to you in your life, you have to actually make the time for it. And if it doesn’t have to be every Saturday or something that’s super consistent, but you actually do have to be intentional about it. And so I think what you’re gonna find in this podcast is how intentionality is really going to support you in your journey of being it till you see it. So without further ado, here is Keri Ford.

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Lesley Logan
Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I’m Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I’ve trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it’s the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It’s a practice, not a perfect. Let’s get started.

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EPISODE

Lesley Logan
All right, Be It babes. I am so excited. You might remember a while back when I was doing a recap with Brad and I said, “Yeah, I made a date with a few girls that I have never met. And they’re coming out to Vegas, and we’re going to hang out and we’re gonna go out for dinner. We’re gonna spend this weekend together.” And people and people are like, “You don’t know each other yet?” We’re like, “Nope, we don’t.” And so we became very fast friends. I feel like I’ve known these women my whole life now even though it’s in such a short stint, so Keri Ford is our guest today. She’s an incredible woman. Keri, can you tell everyone who you are and what you’re rocking?

Keri Ford
First of all, I just love how we came into each other’s worlds. And it’s so true. People are like, “You guys are acting like you’ve known each other for years.” And I feel like on some level, because of our parallel and fitness and our work there we have. (Lesley: Yeah) So my name is Keri Ford, and I’m the CEO of Elevate with Keri, and I’m a transformational coach. I started in fitness as a Certified Personal Trainer. And that was my first experience with coaching. And with the World Wide Web and the world of social media, I realized there was a demand for taking things online. But I was one of the OGs. And it was back before you could even really hire a coach to help you figure out what the fuck you were doing. And so I went back to corporate and then I came back to coaching and I elevated and went through my own transformation. And I just get to share the beautiful world of somatics with women that truly want to change their life from the inside out. So it’s still wellness related. But I realized the intuitive eating component I had spent a long time teaching was just part of the work that I was doing and the bigger picture.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, so you, I know, it’s crazy that we were both in LA doing fitness, like I’m sure we crossed paths at some point, and didn’t even know it. But what was that? So you went back to corporate world. Was that that change like for you to go from fitness to coaching and like somatic coaching and being a transformational coach? That I’m sure it has a nice and windy way of getting there. But like, did you notice you’re going for as you start on that journey? Or are you kind of figuring it out as you went along?

Keri Ford
I’ve always been ever figuring it out, I feel like it’s the longest friggin path. Because when you’re the first to do things in the online space, you’re trying to figure it out for the first time along with all the other first timers. And I remember like watching other people kind of experience their big break, if you will, and being like, what am I doing wrong here? Like how am I not, how can I have other people besides my mom liking my post, you know. And it was really a whole different way to apply what I knew and and teach, you know, online, but I had no idea that I was headed to really be a somatics professional because I didn’t even know what that was. (Lesley: Yeah) I just it’s almost like I danced with that concept for a very long time without really even knowing that I was always gathering tools to teach this.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, so just in case, we’ll just say for Brad, can you explain like what somatics is? And like, how, how that how that makes how that’s a special type of coaching?

Keri Ford
Yeah, somatics is the mind, body connection, which are actually have never been separate. But most people think they’re kind of how do I say and just like layman’s terms that they just they feel kind of at war with themselves, right? Like, take diet mentality, for example, it’s a really easy way to be like, “My body hates me. It’s never doing what I want it to do.” And this is where we can use the power of our mind and our nervous system to truly create new experiences like in the physical world. So yeah, it’s a really powerful way to teach the mind body connection. And it really gets you back into your body where you have felt disconnected.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, like where some people like kind of like walk around us in their head and disconnected from their body, you’re like bringing them back into that and then using that to heal themselves and take them where they want to go.

Keri Ford
Totally.

Lesley Logan
That’s cool. So so were you tra… transformational coaching before somatics? Or was that kind of that actually happened after becoming a somatics coach? What was that like?

Keri Ford
No, I was trying, I was coaching transformation before, I was just using a lot more mindset and thought rewiring and reframing. So for example, I still use this actually, because I do believe in doing all the different things that I’ve collected along the way. And one is called flip the script. So this is really fun. And for those that are listening that want to try something like this, it’s identifying the belief that you have that seemingly is in opposition to what it is you say you want. So for example, you might say, “I always want to have a coach.” Well, all of a sudden, there’s this belief that also argues that point. So that’s what you want. But then you notice, oh, and I have a thought. And the thought is saying, “Well, that’s too expensive.” So then you write both of those things down, right. So your goal, or what you want to achieve is I always want to have a coach, then you notice the opposing thoughts. So you write down the opposing thought. And that says, “That’s expensive.” And then you write down the flip the script. And so what we’re doing there is writing down something that might feel like a lie at first, which is, “I can always afford coaching,” that might be an example of flipping a script. But we want to, we want to put a book on the shelf of doubt that that belief that’s opposing what you want is actually not true. We want to actually start to say, “Well, maybe there’s another possibility that’s available to me here. Maybe I don’t believe it yet.” But is it possible? Yes. (Lesley: Yeah) So that’s something that I use, for example, and had us before I knew somatic work.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, that’s really I mean, I think I just interviewed a woman who had a brain tumor and she had all these because of a four day migraine that the range of our cause, like she ended up having this paralysis, and she was doing so much mindset work on like, “I’m healed. I’m healing all the time. Like my body is healing.” Like saying those things. And then all of a sudden, like, parts of her body started working again that weren’t working before. Like, it’s this incredible thing that we have this power. And yes, they’re our brain doesn’t like to be in dissonance. So of course, if you can’t afford something you’re like, “I can always afford that.” Like, that’s, that is not exactly where the brain loves to be. But if you can start to seek out evidence that will prove that that thought is true, at some point, that is what you want your brain to start going to can, you can make that transformation happen.

Keri Ford
Totally. So through the somatic work, that might look a little different, we might use the sensations in the body to listen to what it’s saying where our current beliefs are. And it’s a little less about the words and more about the sensations in the body. So when (Lesley: Interesting) that, like is okay, so, you know, they might be saying, well, I noticed like a tightening in my throat, as you say that belief. Oh, okay, so what is is there’s, are there words that want to be spoken? What else can you tell me about that feeling in your throat? If there were a color, what color is it? If there were a smell, and so we really just bring deep awareness to the consciousness of ourselves and the patients in the body. So it’s just a different access point. And I love the example you gave, because that really does show you the mind and the body are never separate, the body follows what the mind says. And if we can, in fact, bring them into union, somatics is just a different access point in doing that, and I think it truly accelerates the healing.

Lesley Logan
But it, okay, so this is interesting. I’ve done it because my, my therapist is somatics. And so oftentimes, she’s like, “Where do you feel this in your body?” And sometimes I’m like, “I don’t know …”

Keri Ford
Totally, but even noticing where when a client for me, they look up, I’ll ask them how they feel. And then they look up, that tells me they’re in their thinking mind, what they think they feel versus what they feel they feel, or know, they feel.

Lesley Logan
Oh, that that is, well that’s so interesting. It’s like when people look around before they answer the question, it’s like, “Oh, are you trying to figure out what you’re gonna say?”

Keri Ford
We’re in the thinking mind, right? Yeah.

Lesley Logan
So so can we have some more examples of the somatic thing? Because like, you just mentioned, the throat thing. And what I have, I had a client who, every time she would go on a date, she lose her voice, like she would like, (Keri: Oh my God.) I’m not kidding. Like, she would go on one date, and you lose her voice. And I, and I was like, what it… There’s gotta be something going on with that. That is not like one time, okay, two times, where at three times like, either you stop dating, or we go… What’s going on?

Keri Ford
Yeah, that’s a pattern. And that shows that there’s likely a trauma imprint and a feedback loop that’s present. So I would, you know, ask her if she’s able to connect in that moment, right. And so how I would start this, and the way I do this in my millionaire mindset meditations, is I always bring you into stillness in your body. So we might say, Okay, I’m gonna have you take a few deep breaths, and I want you to bring awareness to your back against the chair, the chair against your back, and just feeling how supported you are. And you’re going to close off the visual cortex, the eyes, close the eyes, because that’s a little bit easier for people to access with him. And I’m gonna have you look down toward the heart space, even though your eyes are closed. So those are a few cues, I might walk somebody through to bring them in. So they can avoid them going into the thinking mind, because the eyes are not open and searching. And so we’re, we’re just in the experience of where our body is, like where our feet physically are. That’s a very grounding thing to do. And then I might say, if you’re able to access it in this moment, can you go back to that feeling that you get when you’re on the date, or, or maybe when you feel like the throat is, you’re almost going to lose your voice or you have lost your voice, wherever she’s able to connect, you might be kind of far along in the process, for example. So she might only be able to connect to after it’s happened. What we want to do is kind of walk her back to where she notices, “Oh, this is always how I feel in anticipation of the date, perhaps.” (Lesley: Oh, interesting.) Continually manifesting this experience. So it says that something’s happening in her body that saying, “I don’t feel safe here. I’m powerless, voiceless, whatever.” And we want to walk her back to that, right. So can you can you connect to that feeling or sensation in your body? And she might say, “Oh, yeah, I noticed. I’m like, salivating a lot. I feel tightness in my chest and my throat.” You’re like, “Okay, great. And tell me a little bit more about that. Are there any other sensations like if it had a texture,” you know? And then you could you could walk her back into, there’s a few different ways here, which is why I’m kind of bumbling around words. It depends on the client, right? (Lesley: Yeah) You might say, does that feel familiar? Anywhere else that you’ve noticed in your life? Where else does that feels familiar. And she’s like, Oh, dots connected, where that imprint took place. Or you might say, if you want to feel safe here, are you open to communicating with this energy, this block, this sensation and ask it why it’s there? Oh, this is the only part of me that really felt voiceless and unsafe around men. Again, I’m totally riffing.

Lesley Logan
Yeah. We’re just making this up. Yeah, but I’m following.

Keri Ford
Yeah, so that’s, that’s how that could look.

Lesley Logan
So this is, so this is fascinating, because you can use somatics as far as like healing and changing a pattern that you have in your life. Have you used it to become more of the person that you want to be? Like, is it is it only for releasing? Or is it also can also be used for like where you want to go?

Keri Ford
Yeah, absolutely for using it to where you want to go. Because we are not where we want to go. Because we don’t think we’re that woman yet. And that is because of perceived lack, perceived dissonance, perceived separation within ourselves. That’s actually what anxiety is. It’s perception that we are separate. But the big question here that somatics really answers is, “How do I then become her? How do I change myself? How do I rewire my beliefs?” This is the bridge.

Lesley Logan
Yeah. Okay. This is where I want to know, this is why I want to dive in if we can, because, (Keri: Yeah) I believe that, like, we don’t like, if you’re waiting until things happen to become the person you want to be, you’ll never become that person. You’ll just wake up (Keri: Right) years later going, “Oh, I’m supposed to just act like that person now.” (Keri” Yeah) Right? Like, that’s how the stories always go. So I’m wondering, like, for all the people listening, obviously, they’re like, “Okay, I’m trying to be it till I see it.” Like they’re recovering perfectionist, they’ve got impostor syndrome, these things come up. How how can you use, how can you somatics to like become that person now, so that you don’t have that dissonance and you don’t create that anxiety.

Keri Ford
So fear doesn’t go away at any level, we just learn to embrace it more. So going back to your question, the first point I want to make when you asked. When do you somatics? Is it just to release whereas it also to become? It’s both. Because as we release, we then expand our capacity in our nervous system, and therefore, what feels safe to have hold, keep, etc. I’m going to give an example here of something physical. So back when I was in Tulum with Jake, my partner, we did cliff jumping, and I jumped four stories off into the cenote, and I had never even I don’t even know if I’ve jumped off the high dive anyway, my body felt wildly unsafe. And yet, there was not I had no physical proof that I was going to be unsafe, Jake had done this jump. But my baseline of fear that I had only ever had to compare it to was like super low, right, maybe I only jumped 10 feet. So my body and my mind is like, you’re only going to be safe if you jump back because you’ve done that before the evidence you have says, you will be safe. And so this is insane. And so I knew that was the reason I needed to do it to free myself from that talk track. So I did take the take the jump and my baseline of fear shifted, because now I was no longer the woman who didn’t take the jump. I was the woman who did. (Lesley: Yeah, yeah.) I choose to put my body in new visceral experiences, you can do this at home with free therapies like cold showers, you your mind will tell you, you are going to die and you can’t do another second longer and oh my God, I can’t do this. And that is the reason you must.

Lesley Logan
Oh, I love that. It’s also like if you’re doing breathwork, you know, there’s like that, if you do a bottom hold, I find those to be a little easier than like a top hole. Which is like where you hold the air in because there’s like the brain is like, “I need to take a breath in.” (Keri: Yeah I’m suffocating.) And if you can just like, you know, obviously don’t do unconscious, but like it take an extra second and show that you can. You can like you can’t go one more second, you can give your body that next experience. That is really cool. I love that story actually a lot. I like I feel like I’ve been that person and other experiences like Brad trying to get me to climb like a rock that’s like five stories tall. And I’m like, “I want to be the woman that does this.” (Keri: Yeah) I’m so scared of that right now.

Keri Ford
Totally. And like that fear doesn’t really go away if you choose to live your life on the edge, both physically and emotionally, right? That but the edge really I’m talking about is that the nervous system capacity. So we want to dance on the edge, but we don’t want to go over it. We don’t want to overwhelm the systems that you go into shutdown or a trauma response. But we want to dance on the edge so we can practice stretching and expanding and then create new evidence. I’m safe. I’ve been here before I’m familiar with this fear. And I know on the other side of it I’ve been okay. So I can do this again and again and I can do that faster. I see this all the time when I help high achieving women apply this to their decision making. What feels irresponsible often they can say, oh wait a minute, I’ve been here before in my body maybe I’ve experienced it was rock climbing, but now I can apply it to business. How can I be a little bit more, how can I expand my risk tolerance here?

Lesley Logan
Oh, that’s so interesting. Yeah, it’s like so transferable in different ways. Yeah. (Keri: Yep. Nothing’s …) Yeah. So, you know, I think I like thinking about people who I know listen to the show, and I think like nodding along. They’re all most of them are in movement of some kind, like some sort of movement professional. So I think they’re like, “Yep, yep, totally agree.” And then, and then there’s, like, family, and partners, and all these responsibilities that are on them. And so how I know you’re a mom, and you have a partner, how, how do you balance like trying to challenge is the wrong word, but like how to train retrain the body that like, “Okay, I can take this tolerance level. I can take this tolerance level.” And also like, the regular life, with all the things that are going like, I feel like, I’d be like, “Okay, I’m doing this. Oh, you want food.” Okay. Do you what I mean? How do you actually balance all of that? Or can you?

Keri Ford
… so the question, just so I’m clear is how do you apply it in real life?

Lesley Logan
Yeah, like if you if you’re, if you’re like, “Yes, I believe this. I’m doing all these things.” And then there’s like life happening. And so it’s, you know, like in a vacuum, it can be like, on a retreat, or at a workshop, it can be like, “Yes, I get this.” And then you go back into your household, and you go back into your routines, and like, you know, some things you can change. I can change my morning routine a bit. I don’t have kids, (Keri: Yeah) but like other people, they have families that they have to support and they can’t change their routines too.

Keri Ford
Yeah, I mean, I think the deepest, like most masterful level of being the embodiment is also letting this be your walking meditation, if you will, like we don’t have to sit in a session with a somatic you know, practitioner to necessarily always access our piece. And I say this when I lead retreats, like let’s not make this a going to church experience we’re like, “Hallelujah. I’m so fucking inspired.” Like, “Yes, sister, like, I love it.” And then you go home, and you’re fucking right back where you were before the retreat. This is about taking what you learn and applying it in your everyday. So we’ll start with small changes. We call this titration and somatics. One of the beautiful, beautiful examples they give of this is if you have two separate chemicals in beakers, and you pour one into the other really fast, it explodes. But if you take these two explosive chemicals that are separate, and you take a dropper, and you titrate, it drop by drop, it’s fizzes. And it combines it fizzes. And it combines and slowly over time, they’re combined, but they’re changed. It’s called titration. So we’ve got to go slow and expand, feel safe, relax, integrate, and we’re gonna go slow, expand, relax, integrate, and it’s really a dance. So it’s small practices throughout the day. It’s inviting your partners into those conversations, and being willing to do things differently with your eyes open walking throughout the day. Right. So now it’s an example in partnership. I feel triggered, who I know this place in my body. I feel anxious. It’s fluttery. This feels like how I am when I’m unsafe. This is a reason for me not to vocalize it where I maybe haven’t before, hey, I’m feeling really triggered right now. There’s something very activated and alive in my body. And I wanted to share with you. Just simply for sharing just just because you’re going to share, you’re going to lean into that. So that’s how you start to create change in your home. You can’t compartmentalize it, especially once you shift your way of being.

Lesley Logan
So this is like a total ticket to me. I just see it as like a be it till you see, it’s like how do you get the family on board with it, you actually have to be the like, be the conversation you wish was happening around you so that it can happen around you. (Keri: Yeah and …) So sharing that moment with them.

Keri Ford
Totally. And at the end of the day, we can’t change the people around us. But especially if you’re a mom and the kids are there, they may not have words for the experience or the shift, but they will mirror you because that’s what mirror neurons do. And so if you’re mirroring anxiety, they’ll mirror it back. If you’re mirroring peace and calm and groundedness they will mirror it back. So you will just see what is alive in you in two little bodies running around with you two kids like me.

Lesley Logan
That is so true. I mean, like we I mean, we don’t have actual human children, but our four legged ones. If we are anxious or frustrated or like something just goes wrong, or like we react out loud, the dogs will wake up from their amazing slumber and they’re like, (Keri: Yeah) and then they’re on edge and they’re like walking around, they’re barking at things and (Keri: Yeah) we are yelling at them for barking and they’re like, “But I’m doing this for you. Like this is the (Keri: Yeah) energy you’re putting out there.

Keri Ford
Yeah, that’s called a tuning to someone else’s nervous system. (Lesley: Yeah) So an example would be birds where one bird flies away and the other birds don’t even think they just fly (Lesley: Yeah) for the whole flock. They’re tuning.

Lesley Logan
Yeah. So, um, so I totally understand the tuning because like, Brad and I don’t share an office any more we used to and, and we have different times that we work in the day, and we have different ways of working. And so like, I was like, “This tuning is not working for me. I need to be in my own office.” But, you know, I think like, even with both partners being on board with like having these conversations and working through these feelings and saying and saying, what’s on their mind? Don’t do you find like, I find like, sometimes I’m having the conversation, the other person’s like, having a great day, and then they’re having the conversation in the middle of my great day. And like, do, do you, do you ever, do you ever see like, it’s that each person is kind of going on at their own space, where have you and your partner found that you’re kind of going at the same pace?

Keri Ford
Oh, I think it just depends. There are often times where I’m holding space for him. And there’s nothing to say do fix provide other than to listen, and to be still and to be grounded in that I don’t join him in his, you know, anxiety, I am grounded enough in myself that I don’t need to right. And that is through the practice of somatic work that I’ve done on myself. Now, a previous more sensitive version of me that didn’t know how to harness this empathic superpower would attune to that partner’s nervous system, and then we’d both be in the tornado of like chaos and anxiety. So I don’t need to join him, because I don’t need to fix him. And so then then it’ll flip flop. Or sometimes we’re both kind of like, this is a yucky day, you know, like, what do we want to do here? What’s, how can we create more joy? What experience do we want to have?

Lesley Logan
Yeah, I think like asking those questions is really true. And it and I love that you shared like being grounded in yourself, I think, depending on who you’re in relationship with, like for us, I know. Like when Brad’s like I’m having anxiety around this right now. I’m like, “Okay, have a seat at the red light.” Do you, would you like some suggestions on some meditations to do? Or do you have one you want to use, you know, and vice versa? It’s like, okay, it’s like, (Keri: Yeah) you don’t actually have to go there with them, to to support them. And I think a lot of times people feel like, oh, I need to like, meet them where they are, I can’t really have the great day that I’m having. If they’re having a moment. It’s like, no, actually, you can actually be grounded in yourself. I love that you said that and allow them to have their moment feel seen and feel here, (Keri: Yeah) which probably will take a lot of that anxiety away.

Keri Ford
And it’s actually more loving and more compassionate not to join them. Because what they need is to be with their feelings and know that that’s okay. We so often go quickly into clean it up, right? You’re crying when we hand you a tissue, hurry up, put yourself back together, messes aren’t allowed, big feelings are uncomfortable. The only person they are uncomfortable for, is the person listening. So if you find that you are going into rescuing mode, any listeners out there, or you’re the one providing the tissue or you instantly go to console them to try and fix what would happen if you just sat with your discomfort of their big emotions, because that’s about you, not them. And then everyone gets to just be okay with their own experience.

Lesley Logan
Oh my gosh, would the world be a different place?

Keri Ford
Yeah. And women are just, you know, so groomed in this fawn response that it’s a slippery slope. You don’t even know you’re doing it sometimes.

Lesley Logan
Yeah. Yeah. I think I definitely think that’s an will be a challenge for some people. But it also like, I hope you’re if you’re listening this like it’s a welcoming challenge. Like you don’t have to fix anything. Like you don’t have to, like just like …

Keri Ford
Feel free in that space. It’s just like, oh, I trust that they can have their own experience. And it means nothing about me.

Lesley Logan
Right. Oh my God. That is that is phenomenally freeing. You know, I imagine like, with your kids, like, as a parent, that has to be one something, you know, that is the right thing to do. And also so challenging, because I’m sure you don’t want to see your children crying, you don’t want to see them frustrated and anxious. Like how how do you handle it with the kids is the same as you do with your partner? Is it just like you let them feel their feelings? Or do you talk them through it?

Keri Ford
Yeah, it’s a little different with the kids. I know so often from guiding my clients through inner child work, where we acknowledge younger parts of ourself that have been waiting for us to come back as the adult self, the mature one, or for my own work that like that, that little one just wants love. Right? And so how can I, how can I provide a safe space just to share and again not send them off to their room because of their big emotions? Or say, “Stop crying. What’s wrong with you?” And sometimes, you know, like, we’ll notice our parents recording that they like laid over our and recorded into our brain like comes out. We’re like, “Whoa, where the hell did that come from?” But as best I can, I often make space for big emotions in the house. We both do. And I will ask, “is there a certain way I can love you right now? Is there some something you would like or need from mommy.” So they make a request for support. “Yeah, I just need a hug. Ah, okay, cool. I’m giving you a hug.” And then they’re like, ‘Okay, I’m good.” You know, it’s there just have a need that’s unexpressed, they didn’t know how to speak.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, yeah. I feel like how different the world could be if like, that, parents of our generation, the generation before we’re even given that, like, I’m just, you know, I know, for from like, my dad’s, my grandparents were from the depression, there was not even, like a luxury to feel your feelings. There was like so, so little that anyone had. So you just just dusted yourself off, and there was no crime, right? And there’s no touching, there’s no hugging, there’s a little loving. And I think that like, each generation has gotten a bit better at at least understanding that but I, I do know that most people are like, don’t cry in public, like, children should be seen not heard, like, you know, that kind of a thing. (Keri: Yeah) And so I feel like there’s a lot of adults out there who, who are really childlike in their big emotions, because they’ve never known how to actually express them and deal with them on their own.

Keri Ford
It’s given me a lot of compassion for my parents who are humans, right. And once you see your parents in their humaneness, you’re like, oh, oh, okay. Like you don’t have all the answers, like, you don’t have to tell me who I need to be. And I don’t have to seek your approval anymore. Like, I can find that on my own. And there’s a grieving in that, in discovering they’re human. And also, I have so much compassion for the parts of them that have come forward as much, much younger, childlike parts in in tantrum, I remember, a very funny Christmas, funny, and that it was interesting, where my dad was basically in a tantrum with my actual child, so his inner child, and if I was my actual child, and I put them both in their room, you know, like, let’s everyone just take a reset here. And he did, he went to his room, and he had a cooldown and my son went to his room, and he had a cooldown and they just needed to be with some, you know, thoughts and things, because then it was getting a little bit disrespectful. And I had to chuckle about it, because I’m like, well, I two years ago, I never would have been able to see this for what it was, and just handle it from a place of neutrality. (Lesley: Yeah) And so they came back, we all had a conversation after everyone decided they wanted their own space. And that was it.

Lesley Logan
Didn’t have to be a thing who did this, like family thing (Keri: No) that now you no longer see them at Christmas? And

Keri Ford
Yeah, that was like really surreal. Because I’m like, wow, my dad’s inner child is fighting with my actual child …

Lesley Logan
You know, so thanks, you said two years, like, I guess like, for the for the people who are like trying to check the boxes in their world? What is that, I mean, obviously, it depends on each person. But like, as you went through your somatics and the training and the coaching that you’ve seen with people, what is what is the length of time for this transformation to happen? Is it something that can happen overnight? Is it a lifelong training, when when can people start to see a bit of of the results.

Keri Ford
Most clients work with me for an average of two years, but I’ve also had clients be with me, and whatever evolution I’m in of coaching for the last decade. So this is a lifelong journey, any personal development, I believe, if you’re committed to living on the edge, and you’re truly what I call the 1% woman, which is a woman that sees things differently, and she’s willing to go to her edge over and over and over again, because it’s in service to herself and the people she serves, then it is a mountain with no top. And I mean that in a really exciting way, not from a place of brokenness or lack. I mean, we are all already healed and whole as we are, and so much more peace is available. This isn’t a box to check. And that’s a really, that’s the learning right there. For so many of us that are high achievers, I call this achiever anxiety, right? It’s the thing that keeps us locked in to the idea that we need a checkbox at all. So this isn’t about meditating on a mountain and having all your good come to you. But it is about finding a balance between what if I just allowed things and attracted things while also marrying that with strategy work in a way that doesn’t have me force get or try to control? And so that’s really, I’m glad you asked that because that’s specifically the niche of women that I work with. (Lesley: Yeah) The sick overachievers that are like, “Just tell me what to do, and I’ll do it.” And I’m like, “I know. Because motivation is not the issue for you. Fucking relaxing is.” So how are we, how can we relax and not burn our business down or like quit our job? How can we do both? How can we have all the success that we want, but feel really good about it in our body, too?

Lesley Logan
Yeah. Oh, yeah. You just describe many of people listening. I always say (Keri: Yeah) I’m a recovering perfectionist and overachiever. And someone’s like, we can never like, I don’t think that’s possible. And I was like, oh, it’s I don’t know that it’s possible. You have recovered of those two things. But I think I can always be in recovery. And that means I can make mistakes and I can, I can make, I can make the adjustments as needed and get back on track. So I feel like that is very helpful for those people listening who are like, “Okay, but how long? Okay, but when?”

Keri Ford
The minute we ask how long, we’ve left the present moment. (Lesley: Yeah) And so that in and of itself is why you need this work …

Lesley Logan
Yeah. So I’m wondering, Keri you’ve done so much, and you like you, you’re you’ve really, you’ve really had an incredible arc in your career. What is it that you’re excited about next? Like, are you, is there something that you’re being it till you see it next? What’s what’s happening next for you?

Keri Ford
Yeah, so we launched a podcast not long ago, which was a whole other level of being seen for me just on video and recording and hearing my voice like, oh, that’s kind of exposing, isn’t it? So that was (Lesley: Oh yeah.) exciting. And now I’m getting ready to literally create, like the best work of my life. And it’s called the Somatic Success Academy. And it’s the leadership training every woman needs for her nervous system. So whether you’re in corporate, or you’re CEO of your own company, or somebody else’s, like if you are a woman in leadership, we will meet this, this is going to be ideal for you and your teams. And I’m building out something that does not exist in the way that I think it should. And so that’s where I’m at right now. That’s what we’re building. And we’re, we’re getting ready to do some really massive pre sales and fun master classes around it.

Lesley Logan
That’s so cool. First of all, what’s the name of your podcast so people can listen?

Keri Ford
Literally First Class

Lesley Logan
I love that. (Keri: Yeah) And so I love where you’re going. I love what your … but you’re putting together how have you had to change what you what you do in your day to day to step into that. Like, what is that, what does that look like?

Keri Ford
oof. you got to walk with the work? Right, that I said earlier, like, the true testimony to mastery is being the deepest embodiment of the walking meditation, like, you live this and people feel it from you. I mean, when you and I met, I was going through like a 30-day makeup free challenge in myself …

Lesley Logan
Y’all, she did makeup free 30-days, and she had a Las Vegas weekend in there. And we went to dinner and we went to shows.

Keri Ford
Yeah, I mean, that’s the kind of courage that I require myself to show up with. And so I’m not going to teach it if I haven’t walked it. And I know that I wish this work was available to me years ago, how many times I would have saved myself the burnout and the sickness and all the things that came with the high strung anxiety that I thought I masked so well, but my body knew better.

Lesley Logan
Yeah. Oh, thank you for sharing that. Because I think I think it’s fun to hear where people have come from and where they’re at now. And then also like, for like, you know, there’s the mountain with no top and not in a depressing way in an exciting way. It’s like, okay, it’s not that like, I like I can’t stop and settle but it’s like, there is another level that I have now come become aware of and like to be that person. I can’t, what got me here, won’t get me there. Like I gotta get to the next. So, so I love hearing that. And I think it’s so true. I think where a lot of impostor syndrome can come in is where people are like see where they want to go but then they act the way that they are. And then there’s like, yeah, you, yeah, you’re not going to feel good enough to be there because you’re not changing the steps around yourself to make sure you can be there so yeah.

Keri Ford
Everything you’re attached to that you that you think defines you, your titles, the fucking logos, the as seen on, the press release. What fuck all that shit. I have all that on my website. I will tell you it’s never made me feel like warm enough, right? What’s made me feel more enough is finding peace in my body and giving less fucks and playing at the top of every mountain that I then uncover. So yeah, I mean all that just it doesn’t even, it doesn’t even matter at the end of the day. Um, so it is it is a really exciting place to play when you realize you can truly gamify life.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, oh gosh, I can’t wait to hear how this goes. You’ll have to come back and tell us how everything is (Keri: Yeah. I love to.) and then we’ll hear what your next thing is. We’re gonna take a brief break and and find out where people can work with you, find you, follow you. Alright, Keri, where do you like to hang out? Where can people learn more about you? Where can they study with you if this is something that’s been interesting, intriguing for them?

Keri Ford
Yeah, if you guys are looking for a program that you know might sound interesting for you whether it be meditations to add to your daily life or a retreat experience where you want to go deeper into something that’s really going to rock your fucking world. You can find me at elevatewithkeri k e r i.com And that has all the socials and things on there we have a bunch, so just go to the website.

Lesley Logan
Perfect. Okay, before I let you go, you’ve given us some amazing tools already. But BE IT action items. Bold, executable, intrinsic, targeted steps people can take to be it till they see it.

Keri Ford
Yeah, carve out your morning sandbox. If you don’t have a morning practice, it doesn’t have to be rising grind, it doesn’t have to be 5:30am and it can look however the fuck you want it to look but pick three items that you want to do for 10 minutes each or so and carve out about an hour in your morning and do them in any order that you feel inclined to do them. So couple options could be breathwork, meditation, stretching, do some Lesley’s Pilates, or like any of that good juicy stuff that lights you up that’s life giving, pour into yourself first so that you can then pour into others later in the day.

Lesley Logan
Oh, I could not agree more with all of that. Yes to all, I I love my morning sandbar like I go to the sandbox. I love it, I love like playing in. Some days I do the walk and then the red light and then Pilates sometimes I do it with like but I asked myself like, “What do I want right now?” All of these things that light my fire and fill me up so yes to that. I want to hear y’all how are you going to use these tips in your life? What what is what is Keri said that has really touched you, changed you, inspired you to do something? Make sure you tag @elevatewithkeri, tag the @be_it_pod. Share this with a friend. Right. Like imagine if the people in your life could all see you when you’re going through something instead of tried to hand you a tissue and tell you to bury it like I mean, I think we could have a lot of different holiday situations, (Keri: Right. I know.) and the situations if that was the case. Keri, ah girl I love you. (Keri: I love you.) I wish we were seeing each other way more often. We’ll have to do another trip soon. And until next time everyone, Be It Till You See It.

Lesley Logan
That’s all I’ve got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate this show and leave a review. And, follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over on IG at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us help others to BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!

Lesley Logan
Be It Till You See It is a production of Bloom Podcast Network.

Brad Crowell
It’s written, produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan. And me Brad Crowell. Our associate producer is Amanda Frattarelli.

Lesley Logan
Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.

Brad Crowell
Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan
Special thanks to our designer Mesh Herico for creating all of our visuals, (which you can’t see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all the video each week, so you can.

Brad Crowell
And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each episode, so you can find it on our website. And finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

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