The Red Flags of

Your Health Provider

Ep. 177 with Lindsay Moore

“If we don’t speak up, no one else is gonna be advocating for us.”

Lindsay Moore

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Bio

Lindsay Moore (she/her) is a birth doula, healthcare consultant, and former hospice volunteer. She also holds a Communications degree– all that’s to say, talking about birth, death, and everything in between comes pretty naturally for her.

She is passionate about helping her clients have the most empowering and present healthcare experiences possible, balancing an evidence-based approach with honoring each person’s intuition and expertise on their own bodies.

Having seen firsthand the impact of excellent support, Lindsay is on a mission to create a culture of ownership around our health by promoting compassionate listening, fierce advocacy, and a real, “F*, yes,” attitude.

Show Notes

How can we have more impactful conversations with our healthcare providers? How can we confidently leave each appointment without fear or anxiety? It all comes down to the bedrock of self-care, advocating well for ourselves and our loved ones.

If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected]. Or leave a comment below!

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

  • Why we don’t speak up for ourselves with medical professionals.
  • Signs and symptoms of people pleasing.
  • Why you deserve to be listened to as a equal to your doctor.
  • Are you collaborating with your provider in a correct way?
  • Red flags in health care providers.
  • Things to look for in a health care provider
  • How to advocate for ourselves and model it to the next generation
  • The outcome of becoming your best advocate

Episode References/Links:

More like this episode:

Transcript

INTRODUCTION

Lesley Logan
Hey, love. How are you? Um, we had so much amazing feedback from a recent episode with Jessica Valant about advocating for your health, but I wanted to bring in an actual health advocate. And this person is a dear friend of mine, you’ll hear why. And you might be wondering like, “Lesley, why are we talking about this? Like, how’s this work?” And I can’t wait for you to get to the part of the episode where it really becomes crystal clear why we’re talking about this, but just in case you’re like, “I don’t know, should I, should I keep going, I wish I just like, listen, the next thing.” I need you to hear me out. You are not just a compartmented person where you can go, “I’m gonna ignore what’s happening over there. And I’m just gonna go over here, and I’m gonna like zero in on this thing. And I’m just going to work on this goal that I have over here. And I’m ignore this thing.” You can’t do that especially when it’s your health. It’s a little easier if you don’t like your neighbor, you can shut the door. You can like refocus your thoughts, probably. But when it comes to your health, if your health is not at an optimal level for you, it is going to affect your ability to be it till you see it. We’ve talked about that with different guests, like Dr. Bender, and then we had on Jenn Pike, where they talked about the different hormone levels and the different things that were going on with your health that could actually affect you showing up fully in this day as who you want to be in that moment, right. And so, it is important for me to give you tools to help you be it till you see it, but they can’t always just be strategy. They can’t just be mindset. They have to sometimes be things that are foundational to you, being more of who you are. And that is making sure that you advocate for your health, for yourself and as the ultimate form of self care. So without further ado, Lindsay Moore, is our guest, and I can’t wait for you to listen to this episode. So dive in real quick. She lives in a really beautiful, amazing space and like a lot of beautiful, amazing spaces. The internet is often a little wonky, so I apologize, there might be a couple of glitches and there that we had. But for the most part, I was able to capture all of the best audio for you. And I think you’ll you’ll get that if you are somebody watches on our YouTube channel, we’ll just have a couple of clips due to the those internet things. So just a heads up on this episode. It is a little bit unique, but I promise you, the words are amazing. The tips are unbelievable. And you are going to want to share this with a friend, a family member or someone in your life who is needing to find ways to take care of themselves, especially in the most like sometimes, to me the most essential meetings that they might have about their health. So here is Lindsay.

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Lesley Logan
Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I’m Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I’ve trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it’s the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It’s a practice, not a perfect. Let’s get started.

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EPISODE

Lesley Logan
Hey, Be It listener. I’m, I’m actually just like, I’m kind of giddy right now. Normally, I don’t do an interview or call before 9am Pacific time. But I, today’s guest is someone who has seen me before 9am Pacific time. So I’m really excited. I’ve known this woman for many, many years. And it’s been incredible to watch her life evolve, and transform. And so now Lindsay Moore is our guest this week, and if you were ever in my life before, you may have got an email from Lindsay and this is my old executive assistant. She is doing wonderful things in this world. Lindsay, will you tell everyone who you are and what you’re doing now?

Lindsay Moore
Sure. Thank you for the amazing intro Les. Yep. So I’m Lindsay Moore. I am a doula and a patient advocacy consultant, which basically is a fancy way of saying that I work with both individuals, families, as well as providers to really help people foster great communication. It’s work that I got into both as a birth doula and through working in hospice, setting with people as they transitioned out as well. And really seeing things all across the spectrum. It’s become truly my passion and my mission to help empower people towards getting the best health care that they possibly can.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, I mean, your your name came up and the work you do came up in an episode we did with Jessica Valant. And so I was like, “Oh, my God, I have to have just have her on the show.” And I, I know we talked a lot about Jessica’s, like about being an advocate for yourself. And Jessica’s episodes, y’all can go back and listen, that we’ll link in the show notes. But I was wondering, like, because you’ve worked on it for on both sides, like I know, you do talks with actual medical professionals and providers, and then also for patients. What is the difference that you are seeing? And like, I guess it’s a really broad question, but like, how does how does like if a patient is advocating for themselves, help the relationship between them and their doctor?

Lindsay Moore
Here’s the great news. The doctors got into this because they want to help people, right? Nobody goes to school for that long, like just for the money. They just don’t.

Lesley Logan
Well, and also but I keep hearing is that there isn’t. Because there’s so much student loans, but I don’t know.

Lindsay Moore
Another interesting thing is having also worked with a healthcare technology company who works very closely with insurance providers. They’re also interested in getting clients the best care possible. It’s from a different angle. Right. But everybody involved here are truly wants this to happen, right? The doctors want you to ask questions, they want to help get you the care that you need, they are dealing with other pressures, right? Insurance companies may not be, you know, the most heart forward and entity involved in this, but they also, generally speaking, have a invested interest in getting you the best care possible. Unfortunately, it is up to us as individuals to be the catalyst for that, it’s up to us to ask those questions and to to move the conversation forward. If we don’t speak up, no one else is gonna be advocating for us as hard as we are going to be advocating for ourselves.

Lesley Logan
Right. And then so, so then I guess the big question is like, why do we inherently not like, I feel like, and maybe that’s like, the human condition. But, you know, we can talk beyond healthcare as well. But like, if women and people in general, don’t take like it’s under, they don’t take care of themselves. They are not taking the care of themselves to say, “Hey, I feel this way. I don’t feel seen and heard in this moment.” Like, what like, if we don’t do that, and then we can’t get the part where the the catalyst to go. So what is it do you think, or what is one of the things that you think keeps people from advocating from them, for themselves?

Lindsay Moore
If we start out with just the healthcare piece, it really is specifically this idea of there’s a term for it called white coat silence. But it’s it’s a power dynamic, right? We are socialized to believe that this person has my best interests at heart, they know way more than me, they’re the expert, they’re gonna let me know what needs to happen. They’re gonna let me know what care I should be receiving. So there’s just inherent belief that there’s a power dynamic. That’s a big part of it. I think that keeps us from speaking up. The other piece, I think, is a real sense of people pleasing, right, as certainly a recovering people pleaser myself. I don’t want to be seen as the squeaky wheel, I don’t want to be seen as causing trouble or questioning or, you know, causing problems for somebody who seems very busy. (Lesley: Yeah) So I think there’s a couple different factors at play, broadly speaking.

Lesley Logan
Yeah. So that’s interesting, because it’s like, the doctors do care. And they do want to help. And we think that they care so much that they’ll just tell us that something’s wrong. And they’re over here going, “No, I care when you tell me something’s wrong.”

Lindsay Moore
Right. And I think there’s also a thing where when you’re an expert at something, you start hearing one thing, and you say, “Oh, I’ve seen this a million times. I know what this is.” They might be missing a nuance about your situation, your symptoms, your body, you are truly the expert on your own body. And so approaching those conversations as as a collaborator, and I think changing the language that we use is really important, right? So as you know, we’ve been shifting towards going from calling patients and doctors into providers and clients, if you’re the client, and you have a client mindset. You know, as you mentioned in the episode with Jessica, as well, you are paying for this in some capacity, you are paying for this service, and they’re providing that service to you. So that’s a big way to go into it. And if you start looking at it as, “Hey, we are collaborating together, we are teammates in my health.” That’s a huge way to reduce some of those barriers to speaking up for yourself, even if you’re worried about the people pleasing aspect.

Lesley Logan
Yeah. Yeah, I think it is interesting as you bring up people pleasing, and like, we don’t want to be the person who’s bothering someone. Oh my God, they’re so busy. We do this, not just what the doctor did with the people in our life. And I’m like, these are stories, we’re telling ourselves that are really keeping us from everything that we’re wanting to have not just our health, but like other things, you know what I mean? Like …

Lindsay Moore
At work? Yeah, any of our goals, those relationships, I mean, you really can take the skill set and expand it way out.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, so um, so you you mentioned so with, some people might not call themselves a people pleaser. Do you have I mean, this might not be in your scope? But like, do you have signs and symptoms that you are so that maybe someone who’s like … But like in a doctor’s office specifically or in our healthcare. Like, what are some, what are some signs of people pleasing?

Lindsay Moore
Sure. So here’s something that sometimes happens to me, even as somebody who does this for a living. In the office, they might say, “Hey, do you have any questions?” And in that moment, I don’t. But on the drive home, I think, “Oh, man, I really wish I’d mentioned this thing, or I really wish I’d asked that question or, oh, I feel kind of uncomfortable. I don’t really want to go back. I don’t feel like I was super listened to.” If you’re doing a post game and not happy with your experience. It’s worth reflecting on, is that the right provider for you? It’s also worth reflecting on, what’s on me, what’s on me to speak up and what’s on me to sort of, you know, pump my confidence up ahead of time, and that’s part of it. Right? We need to also believe that we deserve to have that care that we deserve to be listened to that we are an equal with our doctor. But I think that’s, for me, that’s just a small sign that you might want to take a look at to say, hey, is this something even if I don’t identify as a people pleaser? Is this maybe an aspect of that that I’m struggling with right now?

Lesley Logan
What an interesting, I like that a lot because I do think that a lot of people could probably have resonate a little bit with that, like, you’re like, you, you end up in the car afterwards like, oh, this things and then it transforms and transcends into everything else, you’re doing it. Anyways, but like, I think that is something y’all that’s the Be It action item earlier, you can actually think about and if that is true, what is on you. And I liked that a lot, because it’s so easy to blame the providers, or, you know, or doctors. You’re not yet using that word, y’all like because it’s like, oh, they didn’t listen to me. They didn’t do this. It’s like, okay, what part of it did I have, like, in my recent experience, I was trying to, I was like, “I got my Lindsay training in my head. I’m ready to go. I’ve got my questions like, I’m ready to go.” And like, every question I asked she, like, just, it’s not like, and I was actually getting really angry. Because I was like, she’s not even listening to me. And so then I would ask, other questions or other follow up questions do that. And I just became more and more frustrated with the whole situation, and which is probably better than like, sitting going, “Oh, I’m good. Everything’s fine.” I was just like, “No, this isn’t fine. This is the wrong provider for me.” I literally came prepared. And I did all the things. And I asked and I asked follow up questions. And I think that is a better scenario to figure it out that someone is not a provider for you, not the right provider for you, then a post like the post game and knocking your answers and having to start all over again.

100% because you know that you’ve done your homework. Right. You know that you did your part you showed up. And if it’s still not working despite your best efforts. Yeah, it’s absolutely the right time to look at is this provider I want to continue a relationship with.

Lindsay Moore
I have a seven month old son. And unfortunately, I recently had to fire a pediatrician who was a super nice guy. But every time I would come in and ask him a question, he would start his answer by saying, “Well, here’s what I tell my daughter. Here’s what I tell my daughter.” And even if I went and asked follow up questions back, that was still the the framework from which he was responding. And finally, I had to say to him, “I’m not your daughter. I’m your collaborator in my son’s health, and we need to start from there.” The other thing that I love that you mentioned is that you got angry. I think particularly as women a lot of us are socialized that angers not an okay emotion to express particularly in any kind of power dynamic. But anger is such a crucial clue for us that boundaries are getting crossed, right. So it’s a really great clue that something’s off. And so to your point, that’s a great moment to say, “Well, okay, well why is this off?” Maybe that’s maybe that’s the postgame question, “Why am I feeling angry?” If you’re not sure why. But anger is such important clue within our bodies to say something’s not right, I want to investigate what that is.

Lesley Logan
So that’s so that’s great. So we have the if you if you leave the doctor’s office, and you are having these postgame analysis where you’re like, “I should have asked that. I could ask that.” Like, that’s a sign that you’re maybe people pleasing in this situation, or you don’t have the best provider is to make you feel comfortable and sane to say something. But also, maybe you should prepare. And then on the flip side, if you had prepared, like in my case, and then you’re finding yourself frustrated, angry, it’s a sign that you’re with the wrong provider, do you have other signs that people can reflect on in themselves that may or may, that may show that they are not necessarily collaborating with their provider in a way that they could or that they might need to reflect on and pursue a different provider in their situation?

Lindsay Moore
I would say, just some kind of high level behaviors that you might want to start noticing next time you’re at your provider’s office? Do they cut you off? Do they interrupt you? Right. Are they able to reflect back? What you shared? And have it feel accurate for you? Are they making eye contact? Or are they you know, are they charting, are they they’re rarely on their phone? But do you feel that they are making eye contact and truly listening to you. And if those really basic tenets of good communication aren’t there. That’s red flag number one for me. So let’s establish that we’re just speaking to each other as humans. And just generally speaking, kind of respectfully. For me, also, I think it’s really important that when you leave that doctor’s office, even if you’re not angry, do you feel more or less anxious than when you went in, because we don’t want our providers to just sugarcoat things or just, you know, try to make us feel better unnecessarily. But at the same time, they should be providing some sense of direction, or way forward of what the next step might be. Even if it’s just let’s revisit this in three months. Right.

Lesley Logan
This is so fascinating, because all of these things I feel like are great for in a relationship with any human.

Lindsay Moore
Yeah. Free couples therapy on the pod today, guys.

Lesley Logan
You know what I mean? Like, with friends, with, with partners, with family, with bosses, with workplaces, like, these are, y’all should write these questions down, because like, these are really great for evaluating any situation, you’re with people. I’m wondering, I’m wondering, as you because you mentioned this, and forgive me if it’s too personal, but like, it’s since you are going to be looking for new pediatrician, like, what are some things that you do, as someone who has so much knowledge in this realm and has good practice in it? For advocating, what are the things that you are looking for when you go to find a provider for yourself?

Lindsay Moore
Here’s the great thing. Something that is a great tool that I found for myself is that if I go into onto my insurance carriers website, and I use my find a provider tool, most of the providers have little bios, right, even if they’re just short blurbs, that say not just where I went to school and what I specialize in. But sometimes now they even say, you know, a short value statement, or sometimes you can kind of glean from the resume, maybe what interests they might have, you know, was it a mental health care facility? Was it working with youth? Was it you know, specializing in trauma? There’s lots of things, I think, when you start reading between the lines, that for me, it also depends, of course, on what type of provider I’m looking for. But for me, I’m looking for somebody that is dialed into more of a holistic approach. I want people that understand, you know, mental and emotional health is intrinsically tied to our physical health and should be treated as just as important. So those are the things that I’m trying to look for. I think doing a little bit of research ahead of time is great, it’s easy to fall down a rabbit hole. So we had a temporate it , we only have so many hours in the day. But I think it also depends, again, on what type of provider you’re looking for. For me personally, I just do feel a little bit more comfortable with another woman in most cases. I think for not to not to overly generalize here. But I think a lot of women, maybe some of that inherent sense of power disparity can be lessened. If you’re speaking with another woman, maybe more of a sense of a peer relationship, certainly not the case for everyone on either side of the coin. For me, that’s something that I found personally to be true.

Lesley Logan
Yeah. Well, I love this. Like, it’s like you basically are just going back to dating because it’s amazing, but like you’re looking at the data profile of your provider. (Lindsay: Totally) And, and so looking at the information you can glean and then using that, to try them out, I think especially in healthcare, it can be really interesting. Like they’re like, “This is your doctor.” And I’m like, “Is it? I haven’t met them yet? I don’t know. Do I want this person. I gotta go find out.” So I think that is, and I think that could be part of that like, even like recovering people pleaser or someone who like lends that way. It’s like, okay, well, this is the person I have to go to. And so so thank you for sharing that I had no idea that they’re now putting like values out there. That’s wonderful, if they can, but I think it’s similar thing when you’re looking for best friends, places to work at, people to date. It’s like, what are the things that I need? What are like the things that I value higher on the list when doing this out? And like you had mentioned like, it’s you kind of would like it to be more of a female friend or … for what you prefer. I like I think, going back to what you said, like what is our ownership in that for advocating for ourselves? It’s like, knowing kind of the things are like, these are less of a deal breaker, more of a deal breaker for me when I’m looking at and trying to narrow things down. Is that like, does that make sense?

Lindsay Moore
Oh, 100% 100%. I love the correlation with, you know, looking through the dating profile of your provider, because that really is what we had the opportunity to do, particularly now that, you know, since pandemic, telehealth is so much more accessible for a lot of providers in ways that it wasn’t even a couple years ago, you know, it used to be a huge production to have to like find childcare, find transportation, go into the office, sometimes you have to wait several weeks to get an appointment. Now, it is so much easier to truly date your providers before you really have to settle on one, you know, you can have a telehealth consultation and test it out to see how you feel about it before you really commit to that in office. That’s it. And I think that’s a great option for a lot of people.

Lesley Logan
I love that. My, y’all dad is 70. And he was like, he’s like, “Oh, yeah, I found my doctor.” Like, oh, he’s like, “Yeah, he’s ZocDoc.” Like, he just used, he (Lindsay: Yeah) just used an app. And he’s like, “Oh, you yeah. I have a phone meeting with them.” And it’s like, “You do?” So I think what’s really cool is that more and more people of all ages are, are finding that more accessible as well. I want to go, I want to then, I want to talk a little bit about like, what have you seen, if anything or what do you know about if people don’t advocate for themselves in their healthcare, like how have you seen that affect them and what they’re, they’re likely their livelihood is.

Lindsay Moore
There’s actually a ton of data on this, specifically when it comes to hospital stays something that I was just going over recently, when you look at people that have to stay in the hospital for 30 days or more. And then what happens in the 30 days after they leave, I mean, people that are not advocating for themselves that do not also have allies, whether that’s a partner or a family member or caregiver, they are more likely to have falls, there’s more likely to be issues with medication that’s given to them, you know, errors in the medication, they’re more likely to end up back in the hospital. That’s just one specific example. But it really applies more generally, where if you’re not advocating for yourself, if you are just accepting the care that you were being offered, as opposed to the care that you are asking for or collaborating with your provider on. Your health is going to suffer, right, you’re going to miss things. Because you do need that providers expertise, that is what they bring to the table. What you bring to the table is your expertise on your own body, but they do have a huge breadth of knowledge and experience. Something that might seem sort of insignificant to you, might be a real red flag for them. So serious conditions that could be very easily treated if they’re caught early, if they go unnoticed, or if you’re not speaking up about it because it doesn’t seem like the biggest deal to you or you don’t want to cause problems or it’s embarrassing, right. All of a sudden, something that could be super treatable in the early stages can be much more serious, if it’s left longer until it becomes the biggest thing in the room.

Lesley Logan
That is so interesting. I am happy, I’m glad to hear that there’s like data on that information, especially people with long stays because I think some people need to know that like, this isn’t just like a thought that we’re just like taking on and like applying to the whole rest of our lives. It is there’s you know, evidence that shows that if you aren’t advocating for yourself, your health suffers, which means, you know, life can end sooner or that it can keep you from being able to do things I know for myself if I am sick, nothing that’s creative and getting done. Like I’m not a nice person. And then I don’t like who I am. So …

Lindsay Moore
And then it just snowballs from there. Yeah.

Lesley Logan
Yeah. So when I’m sick and I don’t like who I am, I’m stuck with myself in a room. So so I mean …

Lindsay Moore
The quality of life, right? That’s what you’re describing. It’s your quality of life is impacted, even if your actual health is able to recover. What time are you losing, in terms of the quality, of it in terms of your enjoyment, in terms of what goals you’re able to accomplish? It suffers.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, and that’s like, I mean, that’s well, that’s the whole reason why I want to talk to you. It’s like if our, I have a lot of people who reach out to me and they’re like, “Oh my gosh, I have all these ideas, but I’ve got like these things going on.” And it’s always health related. It’s or if it’s not their health, it’s someone in their lives health. And so I think it can be really easy for us to focus only on like, okay, this is the way to manifest or this is the way to interview or this is the way this is the strategy for this email thing to make this work. But like, if your health is not at a place of optimal level, none of that stuff matters, you’re not going to get it done. And if someone in your life who you care about you live with, if their health is not optimal, it’s going to affect those things as well. So I think we, we tend to, like you mentioned in the, a moment ago, like something that’s innocuous to us, well, it might not actually be, as you mentioned, and that and like, because we’re like, we can be so focused on like, I got to do this thing, because that’s the goal I had for myself when, when we forget that we’re a whole person, and we are health as part of that.

Lindsay Moore
Yeah, and it truly is the bedrock of self care, like literally self care, right? Make sure that that foundation is solid, so that you’re able to go and thrive and go after those goals, and enjoy your life as much as possible. And I think, you know, particularly for women, we often fall into the role of caretaker. I think there’s a balance between trying to set our own boundaries when possible. And also, you know, that’s a wonderful opportunity to help advocate, it’s going to make that person’s life better. It’s gonna make your life better.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, oh, oh, that’s so good. I mean, y’all don’t we all want to have better quality of life and like, and, and it is not so simple as just advocating for yourself, but it is like … (Lindsay: It’s a start, though.) It’s the start. And if this is a part where you find yourself or like your family struggling, then that’s the work to be done right now, as opposed to, like, you know, the next lead magnet or. You know what I mean?

Lindsay Moore
And listen, I think there’s also, I know, for me, oftentimes, it can be really easy to just want to bury myself in work or just trying to go after the next dream. And sometimes it’s a way that we cover up dealing with something that because let’s be honest, sometimes dealing with health issues, it’s scary. It’s scary. We don’t always want to look at things we might not want to speak up also not because we don’t feel that we’re good enough, but because we’re afraid that we know it’s serious. And that’s tough, man, that’s that’s the adult shit.

Lesley Logan
Oh, that is so true. And it’s like, I mean, like, I it’s not, y’all, I definitely have found myself going, “I’m actually avoiding going to figure out what this is.”

Lindsay Moore
Totally, I have to. Like, “I don’t want to deal with this. I don’t have time for this.”

Lesley Logan
Yeah. Because I like I don’t want to deal with the emotions that’s going to be around that information.

Lindsay Moore
For sure. You know what I think also, you know, as we start as we get older, and if you’re somebody that is taking care of your parents, too, I know that that can also be a struggle of trying to advocate for your parents, because that’s a switch and dynamic. And that’s something I think we luckily, like newer generations are changing the relationship around that. But I think particularly for people in our parents generation, that is a struggle, right, like, I would rather just ostrich and not know, and maybe it’ll get better, and maybe it’ll be fine versus having to face the scary questions.

Lesley Logan
Yeah, yeah, that’s, um, that is, I think, also the way you call it, the white coat situation, (Lindsay: White coat silence. Yeah.) white coat silence. I feel like with our, with my parents, and like, even above them, that’s definitely like the doctor said this. And like that is …

Lindsay Moore
Yeah. (Lesley: And it’s like …) God himself came down and said.

Lesley Logan
Yeah. Yeah. And like, I think, you know, for our generation, like, there’s absolutely a difference. And like, we can see that and if you’re, if you’re raised that way, like this whole conversation could be like, yeah, guys, this is really thanks for sharing that. But this is really hard for me. Absolutely. Or you can also be like, that doesn’t make any sense. And we’re like this dark generation where I hope that people younger than us are saying this is like, it’s quite normal. Like, I mean, imagine the world where you grew up. And it is a client provider relationship versus like, having to retrain yourself into that mentality. And I think for the providers as well.

Lindsay Moore
For sure, and that’s something that even as young as my son is, and I realize he’s not, you know, fully registering what’s going on, but to me, it’s something that’s on my mind every time that we do have to go to the pediatrician, right? How can I model for him the type of communication that we should be having? You know, just how are we approaching a visit? Right. We’re not going to, we don’t need to be fearful. We do need to ask our questions. We do need to make sure that, you know, we’re having a good relationship with this person. They’re here to help us and we got to pull our own weight.

Lesley Logan
Well, Lindsay, you’ve really brought us like, we’re advocating for ourselves, then we’re modeling for the children or people around us and we’re (Lindsay: Yeah …) their parents.

Lindsay Moore
… do it. Just do it for the children.

Lesley Logan
Yeah. That’s like, that’s like the things I I think about all things I’m like, “Okay, this might not affect me, but it’s gonna affect the people after me. So I should be kinder.” … thing over here. Wouldn’t it be nice if we all felt that way? But um, you know, I feel so I feel like we we’ve only we touch the surface, and we have some great things in here. But I might like the thing that it keeps coming to this whole thing. As we mentioned earlier, it’s quality of life. And it’s like, if we can advocate for ourselves, and it’s very unique and sometimes uncomfortable situation, but it’s so personal, it will, it’s a muscle that will affect the rest of your life. And as you, as you mentioned in the study, when you don’t do it, it affects the quality of your life.

Lindsay Moore
Absolutely. And I think we can even take these skills and apply them to our businesses, as he said, like to our personal relationships, or friendships, just approaching any conversation that you have the slightest whiff of anxiety about or just questions about. And if you can, sort of, even if it’s just five minutes in the car on the way there, take your time to say, “Okay, what do I want out of this situation? What do I need out of this conversation? How am I going to approach this? What’s the most proactive, positive collaborative way that I can have this difficult conversation?” And I think you’re really going to start to see other areas of your life start to skyrocket as well.

Lesley Logan
Beautiful, I love this all so much. Thank you, Lindsay. We’re gonna take a brief break and then find out where people can learn more from you. Lindsay, where do you hang out? Do you coach people on this? We have a course on profitablepilates.com, y’all. That she was so amazing at teaching all of our Agency members how to, how to … themselves, but how to teach their clients, how to advocate for themselves. Is there anything else that people can find resources with you?

Lindsay Moore
Yeah, of course, I would head over to my website, which is helloharmonia.com. I’m also on Instagram @helloharmonia and my personal account @lindsaycmoore. That’s the best way to connect with me. As far as services, yeah, I’ve got a great course on Profitable Pilates that I’d love for people to check out if you’re interested in learning more about advocating for yourself and others. I also do private client work, consulting, and workshops. So please go ahead and check that out on my website and get in touch if you have any questions.

Lesley Logan
Amazing. Amazing. Okay, before I let you go, BE IT action items people can take. I know you gave people a lot of calls to action. But any thing that is bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted steps people can take to be it till they see it.

Lindsay Moore
For sure. I’d say listen to your postgame. How are you feeling? Do you feel anxious? Do you feel angry? What’s going on in your body? What’s that telling you about what you need to change moving forward? I’d also say adopt your client mindset. You are the client, they are providing you a service. And how can you collaborate with them to have the best experience possible.

Lesley Logan
Beautiful, those are easily well not easily. But you can write those down. And you can actually take action with those things in your next visit with your providers. Y’all, I hope that you understand that I can give you all the tools and the entire world to do anything you want to do. But if you don’t take care of you, and you’re not advocating for you, it they’re all just tools in a toolbox, they’re not going to actually have the effect that when you are like really owning taking ownership of yourself and making sure that you’re feeling seen and heard in your health care. It all goes together. We’re not compartment to people. So Lindsay, thank you so much for helping us understand that, for giving these amazing tools. You are a wonderful human being doing massive things in this world. And I’m just so grateful that I get to know you in my life.

Lindsay Moore
Thank you so much for having me. It was so nice to chat with you.

Lesley Logan
All right, everyone. How are you going to use these in your life? Are you gonna use these BE ITaction items? When is your next appointment? No, I’m kidding, you’re not telling me that. But but please make sure you take these notes and put them in your calendar as a reminder before your next appointment. And share this this episode with a friend. Some of you are like, I don’t know how to do that on the, on like the interwebs. And you can actually tell our team where you listen to podcasts and where you want to share this and we can actually help you because it’s complicated between all the platforms. We do want to make it easier for you to help your friends learn the things that you’re learning and that you want them to because I’m sure somewhere like my friend likes, listen my mom is listening to this. Well, let’s help you make sure that they can do that. And until next time, Be It Till You See It.

Lesley Logan
That’s all I’ve got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate this show and leave a review. And, follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over on IG at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us help others to BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!

Lesley Logan
Be It Till You See It is a production of Bloom Podcast Network.

Brad Crowell
It’s written, produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan. And me Brad Crowell. Our associate producer is Amanda Frattarelli.

Lesley Logan
Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.

Brad Crowell
Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan
Special thanks to our designer Mesh Herico for creating all of our visuals, (which you can’t see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all the video each week, so you can.

Brad Crowell
And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each episode, so you can find it on our website. And finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

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