Your Daily Reps to Ditch Impostor Syndrome

Ep. 287 with Lesley & Brad

“There’s nothing more that you have to become to be you. You’re already you.”

Brad Crowell

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Show Notes

Brad and Lesley emphasize the importance of practice in building confidence. Drawing from Ryan Lindner’s experience, they discuss how competence doesn’t come from waiting but from taking action. They highlight the value of practicing in various situations to become more comfortable with who you are.

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In this episode you will learn about:

  • Why impostor syndrome can hold you back from taking action.
  • The importance of setting boundaries for self-growth.
  • The value of clarity in relationships from the start.
  • How to build confidence through practice.

Episode References/Links:

Transcript
Lesley Logan: I think it’s important for us to revisit impostor syndrome because it just keeps showing itself up as ugly. Just like thorn in your side and it’s coming because you are not being yourself.

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Lesley Logan
Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I’m Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I’ve trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it’s the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It’s a practice, not a perfect. Let’s get started.

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Lesley Logan 0:49
Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co-host in life Brad and I are going to dig into the collected convo I had with Ryan Linder in our last episode, if you haven’t listened to that one, you should go listen to it. You can look out for this one, but you should listen to at some point. You know, when this podcast the reason we want you to listen to the first to the end, you can bounce around as much as you want.

Brad Crowell 1:10
Totally.

Lesley Logan 1:10
We I think it’s fun to hear what we have to say because it feels like you’re part of the conversation and then you go listen that one.

Brad Crowell 1:16
Yeah, I mean, if you’re new here, pods, the weekly pods are basically connected. So the first one is an interview. And then the next one is a recap of it.

Lesley Logan 1:26
And the FYF has nothing to do with any of them. So it’s always exciting. You should do that. And also if you’re new here. Hi, I’m Lesley Logan.

Brad Crowell 1:32
And I’m Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan 1:33
Well, I introduce you we don’t introduce me so.

Brad Crowell 1:37
Yeah, it’s true. She’s Lesley. Welcome.

Lesley Logan 1:40
Today is November 9th 2023. And is actually Cambodia Independence Day. 1953 is when they actually got their independence from France because yes, France tried to take the France ruled over them for a while.

Brad Crowell 1:52
Almost 100 years. It was like the 1860s that they were quote unquote, discovered by France.

Lesley Logan 1:58
Yeah, yeah, that’s, that’s a lot of not so good things in there. But it’s also why when you go to Cambodia, some people do speak French.

Brad Crowell 2:06
Yeah, there’s a lot of French influence for sure. Yes, no doubt about it.

Lesley Logan 2:09
But it is their independence day. And it’s a big holiday there. Often celebrated more in the capital city of Phnom Penh. But at any rate, I think it’s really amazing that they have their own independence from another country.

Brad Crowell 2:20
Yeah. And Cambodia has a soft spot in our hearts because we have a place there. We go there every single year, we actually sponsor a girl there to go to school, we take people there in our retreats, we get to explore all the things it’s we’ve really fallen in love with the country of Cambodia.

Lesley Logan 2:38
We live in a village.

Brad Crowell 2:39
Just incredible.

Lesley Logan 2:39
When you’re part of that village, it’s really fun to you know, be part of that. And it’s I love taking people there, because it’s really important that you see, we can all travel to Europe and other western countries all the time. I think it’s really important to see how people live in other parts of the world that are different than your own. Yeah, it really it’s not just about like, having grateful what you have, it’s actually like, they’re very present people. You know, like I and it’s a it’s a plate, it’s like when I’m there, it’s like you feel you turn off the whirlwind and like it’s a it’s an outdoor, so you can like lifestyle, like they spend a lot of time of their day outside very much a community. They take care of each other so much. And so we you know, we use you really start to realize like how much you can be part of your own community where you live when you see how communal some people can be. So anyways, Happy Independence Day to them. We just got back, I just got back from Chicago, Brad did not join me on this trip. That means I didn’t get lost. I didn’t lose an ID. I didn’t do anything that I didn’t miss a flight or any of those things. Like on what. And I’m actually heading into Arizona tomorrow to have a girls weekend with my family. And then I come back and I’m home for the rest of November with Brad. And we have Black Friday, Cyber Monday stuff going on which we will only offer during the week of the actual American Thanksgiving. So if you are wanting to know what those deals are, you have to get on the email list for that stuff.

Brad Crowell 4:04
Yeah, so both for onlinepilatesclasses.com For OPC. And for ProfitablePilates, we’re gonna be doing some special things. And I really I’m excited for our BFCM Black Friday, Cyber Monday sale coming up for Profitable Pilates, because it’s all about a webinar that I’m going to do a public webinar that we’ll do on December 3rd, okay, and it’s gonna be all about what your Pilates website needs. So make sure you pay attention to that that’s where you’re gonna get those tickets and come hang out with me and we’ll dig into websites and SEO and also images and all the things it’s gonna be a lot of fun.

Lesley Logan 4:41
When we first offered this topic, like you had very little options to build a website and everything costs money and now there’s like so much amazing plug and play stuff. So it’s really changed and it shouldn’t you should not be afraid of it. It’s not expensive anymore. So I think that’s really cool. After he’s done with that webinar. A few days later we hop in the van well first we kick off our tour in Las Vegas and then we play the Leaving Las Vegas song as we exit Alley fitness and head to St. George.

Brad Crowell 5:08
How’s it go? Leaving Las Vegas?

Lesley Logan 5:10
No. I’m leaving Las Vegas. Anyways, guys so bright it’s Saturday night anyways, Who sings it? It’s like it’s like not Alanis Morissette, but it’s something like that. Leaving Las Vegas song, Sheryl Crow, Sheryl Crow. I love Sherly Crow. I went to the the Las Vegas airport. And I was like going up the escalator to go to Security. And the song was playing in the terminal like for south southwest. And I was like, did they play this like 24/7? Or is it just happening right now? Can you imagine if they played all day long, every time like someone into the airport, they play Leaving Las Vegas, it was just that moment, but it felt so apropos. Anyways. So we’ll be playing that song. And then we’ll go to St. George, and then we will hit the rest of our cities.

Brad Crowell 6:01
7000 miles, we’re going from Vegas to Boston to Miami. It’s gonna be crazy.

Lesley Logan 6:07
In between, like Denver somewhere in Ohio, like lots of awesome stuff, you’re gonna want to go to opc.me/tour to find out all the stops. And I expect you to get in your car and join us somewhere near you. Because we want this to be the biggest tour we’ve ever done. And just so you know, at the time of recording this, we don’t have the details we can’t tell but I’m gonna tell you right now, you’re gonna want to make sure you spot this van, you’re gonna want to make sure you come to this tour, because there are reasons that you want to come besides meeting me. Yeah, I’m just saying.

Brad Crowell 6:38
We got some exciting things cooking. So tune in.

Lesley Logan 6:42
Yes. Before we go on to talk about Ryan, we have an amazing question from someone.

Brad Crowell 6:48
Yes. So okay. This is a great question. And it’s probably one that’s, I guess, sometimes overlooked, because we obviously live in the world of Pilates. And so everything seems pretty obvious to us to where to find things. But somebody said, Hey, how do I become a Pilates instructor? And I was like, Oh, that’s an awesome question.

Lesley Logan 7:14
It’s like a question that gets asked so much. It’s every single week when I look at like, who goes to the website where they search, they search for this. And we have lots of tools on this. But I got this in an email because someone who’s like I love Pilates, I think I should just be able to teach it. But I’m moving at the end of the year, and like, are there things they should consider? And I thought that that was such a great question. And I wanted to say, we do have some free stuff on the site on profitablepilates.com. We’ll make sure the links are in the show notes that actually like a free course on like how to become applies instructor, we also have a whole series of courses, once you’ve like, are like in a programs you can set your business up correctly. But in between those two, I have a book where the first chapter actually talks about what questions to ask a teacher training program. While I’m a classical teacher, I do not force people to become classical teachers, the questions or things you should be asking any teacher trainer you are thinking of purchasing from because here is the deal. No two programs are built the same. You cannot compare this not apples to apples. It’s like every type of produce and also the ones that you’ve ever heard of. So every person, every program you’ve seen out there is built by someone based on what they want for their studio, or what they were missing in their teacher training program. And so you first need to make sure that you like the teacher trainer that you have. The second thing, especially if you’re moving is to make sure that what you’re being trained in is a comprehensive program, and that you can teach in any kind of Pilates studio. So if it is something that’s like, oh, it’s like, if you hear like, sorry, unique blend of exercises based on the equipment that we built, those are signs that it’s not gonna be great for you, maybe not for other people, it might be great for other people. But if you are wanting to have a certification, where you can joke anywhere, you’re looking for a conference, like him comprehensively trained program on all the equipment, so that wherever you end up in this world, you can actually teach in a full studio. Now some countries have different rules around like actually being certified at the end of the day. For the most part, it’s an unregulated job, which is why there are so many different types of trainings out there. So you want to definitely check out my book, it probably will take you six to nine months, six to nine months is what you’re looking at to be sure, yep. And if it’s anything that takes you more than a year unless it’s on your end, like that’s your choice. That’s a little interesting. Most of the time it’s most of the training weekends can happen within six or nine months and then you take the amount of time you need. So anyways, get the book, get the course check it out, and then let me know end up doing we can celebrate your process. If you have questions on anything you want us to answer. You can send that into the Be It pot and we’ll answer on the next episode.

Brad Crowell 9:44
Okay, now let’s talk about Ryan Lindner. Drawing on a wealth of experience overcoming personal hardships. Ryan Lindner collaborates with clients and top organizations around the world to address turnover issues and instill a sense of humanity and understanding within workspace leadership. I thought was interesting that he said, When you get hired for a role, they often they treat you as if you are the role, like, all right, you are going to run the shipping department. So we’ll talk to shipping and receiving. All right, yeah, call shipping and receiving not call Bob, but no call shipping and receiving. And, you know, like humanizing the team again. It’s interesting, it just changes that scope. But also, it was really interesting to listen to him talk about, you know, his, like, all the things and what he’s been able to do and his personal struggle with with, you know, imposter syndrome.

Lesley Logan 10:42
Yeah. We’ve had an impostor syndrome before on this podcast, probably several different episodes. John Laura was the top one really great one. Really great one. And so one of the things I love that we talked about, as he discussed the tendency of people with anxiety to seek approval, and please others, and the thing about people pleasing is that’s just a form of control. And you actually can’t control how those people are. And so he explained that having boundaries means you have to say no more, which means you may have to end some toxic relationships or leave some jobs. And he emphasized the importance of self love and owning one’s worth, and detaching them from external approval. Oh, my God. Well, if you can figure that out, y’all in a in an episode, you just you should be teaching a college course, it is hard. Okay. Especially if you were raised to be that way, if that was like a learned behavior that you have, but I actually I liked that he talked about boundaries means you have to say no, do you know that it is actually kind to have boundaries? It is actually very kind of boundaries. And we’ll talk about this in episode coming up with Kelli Adame. For my female, females wanting to live and in more feminine energy, it’s actually very feminine to have boundaries and say how you will and will not receive other people. And so boundaries doesn’t mean saying no to every like, it’s I actually want to rephrase it. When you have boundaries, you’re saying yes to the things you actually want in your life. If you don’t have boundaries, you are actually saying no to something else.

Brad Crowell 12:13
While you’re probably saying yes to everything, you’re saying yes to everything, inadvertently, you’re saying no to something.

Lesley Logan 12:18
Especially yourself. And so he said, he stressed so much. He’s like, you have to love you. And you have to do that again. And you have to own who that person is. And I think, I think is the hardest part. I think a lot of people don’t know how to love themselves. Because how many people listening raise your hand. Only one if you’re driving, if your family taught you how to love you. Did your parents show them like you like self love? Because that’s how you learn it, right? Like it’s a learned behavior. So if you only see your parents who are constantly trying to change how they look, if they’re like, like, my, my, all the women in my life were like always on a different diet every single week, and then cheating and going here and have these chips with you. So like, I didn’t see self-love. Constantly, consistently unmodeled and why would they the people before them. That’s a fucking luxury. Can you imagine the people in the depression and the wars going? I love myself so much like, it’s a fucking luxury, right? So we have generations of people not modeling self-love.

Brad Crowell 13:19
And so really interesting. I never really thought about that my parents were when I was a kid. Every week, they would drag me out to the stupid soccer game that they played in and we had to sit on the sidelines. And I hated it.

Lesley Logan 13:33
That’s so cool. And I was like, Yeah, but that’s so cool because they go watch your fucking soccer game.

Brad Crowell 13:39
On the weekends, we would go sailing and every we hated sailing. Oh my god, my dad was like trying to flip the boat. He was having so much fun. He’s like, the best thing ever. And we’re like, terrified, and my mom let us take a thousand swim classes.

Lesley Logan 13:53
I think that’s why you’re the unique human that you are, because your parents showed you like how to find, like, fix things for yourself.

Brad Crowell 14:00
Yeah, that’s what I’m coming to. I don’t think I really realized that they were, maybe they were doing it because they wanted to do it. But they were actually also modeling. (inaudible)

Lesley Logan 14:08
This is hilarious. Do you know what everyone says about you? They’re like, Brad is so happy. Brad is like the kindest person. I know. He’s is a very interesting bird as any like they’re just like, he’s just like, he’s just got like, he’s just, you know, a good person who loves everybody and like, you’re not very good at taking like prioritizing yourself. We’re still working on that, last episode. But like, you I don’t see people pleasing you at all, like, at all and so much. You have zero problems telling people no, I’m like, Oh my God. We like told them yes. And he’s like, it’s okay. We just change our planets. I’m like, we can’t change our plans. We we have to go we said we’d be there. So like it explained like you were modeled like to, it’s okay to do the things you want to do.

Brad Crowell 14:55
And my parents liked to play volleyball. My dad played in the band at the church.

Lesley Logan 14:59
They don’t listen to this show, they can’t hear how amazing they did a good job raising you.

Brad Crowell 15:05
My mom took sign language classes.

Lesley Logan 15:07
Oh, that’s cool.

Brad Crowell 15:08
You know, like, like they definitely, you know, pursued individual things. And then did those things.

Lesley Logan 15:15
Yeah. So this episode wasn’t for you at all. At any rate, it’s for the people who this is for, if you struggle with these things,

Brad Crowell 15:22
Oh, are you kidding? No. There’s still plenty for me to learn from Ryan.

Lesley Logan 15:25
Yes. But I’m just saying, if you struggle with these things, and it wasn’t modeled for you, it’s I’m not giving you a Get Out of Jail Free card. But I’m saying like, it’s no wonder it’s a difficult decision, and you are going to have some toxic relationships that have to end. And he

Brad Crowell 15:39
Well, those I mean, those talk. Well, you know, what you guys were talking about was that those toxic relationships will inadvertently end.

Lesley Logan 15:46
Yes, and also, the very last thing one time about this, like he stressed the importance of defining relationships from the start. And I, this was very interesting. When I went to college, there was this thing called DTR. And I had no idea what that meant. And down to no determine the relationship. Oh, DTR. Yes. DTR. It’s a conversation. Well, I went to a Christian college y’all so shocking. I know. But I did. I fucking did. I fucking did. I fucking did. And I thought I said, fuck all the time. Anyways, it was just like thing that people would do. They’re like, oh, we went on a date. And we DTR and like, after a date, like after a date. But I do. I’m not saying that. Like, you should be doing that every time your date. But I do think it’s important to be very clear about who people are in your lives in the relationship that it is and whether that’s a conversation to have with them. Or if it is one that you just have to have with yourself to understand like, okay, Julie from the office who drives me fucking crazy. The relationship with Julie is at the office only. And if you’re taking Julie shit home with you, you are muddling the relationship. Or if you’re letting Julie when I also hang with you in the weekend, you don’t have to that you can say, Hey, Julie, I love I love our time at the office together. But I don’t have time for us to have relationship outside of the office together. And like, Yeah, that might piss Julie off. And you know what, hopefully have a good HR and like, they probably already know how crazy Julie is. And so sorry for any Julie’s out there. Well, I mean, the poor Karen’s have already been. So let’s just find your name. Anyway, I think like, definitely take some time to define relationships from the start is going to help you take yourself off of the pressure of showing up in a way that’s unaligned with the relationship’s definition. Did you DTR in college, because I never DTR I was like, I’m gonna get through four years of college, without that DTR. Because it just felt weird. It felt like everyone want to get married right away because they just wanna have sex. And it’s like, well just go have sex. Anyways, welcome to my college experience.

Brad Crowell 17:44
Well, saying no, wasn’t something I was always, you know, good at.

Lesley Logan 17:48
You say no, all the time.

Brad Crowell 17:50
I do now. But when I was in college, I didn’t. Oh, you said yes to everything. Well, it wasn’t that I said yes to everything. But I wanted to fit it into, you know, even though I was still like,

Lesley Logan 17:58
You, you wore rings and all your fingers. You had your hair colored the wrong color.

Brad Crowell 18:03
Yeah. I know. I definitely pushed all the boundaries, but it didn’t mean I didn’t want to fit in. Okay, right. So, you know, I don’t know what I don’t know. I thought the DTR thing was kind of silly. But I did try to date a girl on my campus. And I asked her dad, if I could date her. And he said no. And I was like, oh, fuck, now what? She lived in Canada. And I was like, that’s fair.

Brad Crowell 18:16
But did her dad live in Canada? I mean, I’m surprised because that would be really great than she could stay if she married you.

Brad Crowell 18:40
Yeah. But no, I wasn’t really trying to date so much. I just thought it was all a little.

Lesley Logan 18:49
I don’t even think Ryan was even talking about dating. But that’s what my brain went to. I was just talking about, like relationships in general, like the people in your lives. And so I do think determination is really important.

Brad Crowell 19:00
Yeah, I think so too. Especially like, you know, defining the relationship can help with boundary setting. And we were talking about boundaries. Because, you know, if you’re

Lesley Logan 19:13
Well, if the relationship is a work relationship,

Brad Crowell 19:16
Then the boundary is the end of the day.

Lesley Logan 19:18
Yeah, you’re your boss, the boundary’s end of the day,

Brad Crowell 19:21
And I think we were talking about this before on a previous episode here, that the, the way that work from home has shifted. It’s been so empowering and freeing and amazing, but it was also completely changed our boundaries. And if we’re not careful, you know, we’re taking home, you know, all this work, meaning we never actually set an end-of-the-day boundary for us. And I think that it’s also been mission creep with text messages from work coworkers and working on emails late at night and all this kind of stuff.

Lesley Logan 19:21
And you know, I think it’s France or when other countries of Europe it’s illegal. And also they are not. There is zero expectation of you responding to anything outside of office hours, whatever.

Brad Crowell 20:09
Yeah.

Lesley Logan 20:09
it’s actually weird if you do that they’re like, what’s wrong with you?

Brad Crowell 20:12
Yeah. You know, and, and I don’t I don’t know that I agree. I think that’s a bit extreme. But I, I, I do think that it’s healthy to say like, unless the fucking house is burning down, don’t contact me outside of those hours. And you’re and like, that’s with because you’ve defined the relationship as this is a work relationship, that it can help you reinforce your boundaries. You know, so, yeah, anyway.

Lesley Logan 20:34
Define your relationships. Okay, what did you like?

Brad Crowell 20:35
Okay, so, I, well, you guys got into introvert extrovert, how you and also defining that how you recharged. You know, some people recharge being alone and others, you know, go together, you know, when it’s when people together. And he started talking about how, you know, he’s also, you know, very introverted, but he does all these speaking engagements, right? And so he talks all these people at a time and how it stresses him out still, you know, even now, after having done it for so, so much time. And then he kind of, you know, he kind of hidden him, he specifically said, I had a conversation recently with, like, a general or somebody huge in the military, because he got a chance to work with people in the military, right. And that kind of led you down this interesting thing about titles, right? And how titles made will make still make him uncomfortable can make you uncomfortable. If you know somebody’s title, you started talking about Doctor and how like you were teaching a doctor Pilates and how you’re like, Oh, why are they even taking Pilates from me? Because they are a doctor. And they know everything you know about I don’t remember what kind of doctor they were. But you know, your orthopedic surgeon. That’s what was and you came to this conclusion that, yeah, okay. They may understand the body, but they don’t know how to move their own body. You know. And anyway, the point of it, the point of his thing was that like, when he started to, to focus on their title, the people that he was discussing things with and talking to a coaching, basically, it was intimidating to him. But if he could, like, put the title aside and just talk to like a human, then all of a sudden, it would change the dynamic. And, you know, I mean, I, what it immediately made me think of was, what if you were walking down the street and you bump into a President of the United States, and you don’t know that they’re the president or were a president, and you just strike up a conversation with them, and you talk them like a human. And it’s probably going to be just a simple, easy exchange, conversation, whatever. Nothing weird about that. But if you were walking down the street, and they have the Presidential motorcade with 57 Secret Service agents, and like dudes carrying guns near them, you’re gonna be like, Whoa, I have no, no way. I could never even speak to that person I would never try. you know. And so just knowing the person’s title alone, it’s such a crazy thing, how we how that shifts their own dynamic.

Brad Crowell 20:36
Yeah, it’s true. I mean, like, even when I was teaching Pilates, like when the celebrities would need a session where I was, and I would have to teach them like, there’s this moment of like, okay, so like, it’s a little awkward, because like, you’re like, I feel like I know a lot about you, you know nothing about me. But also you’re it doesn’t matter. You’re just want me to teach you and I’m here to teach you, but I’m a little nervous. And like, it takes a few moments here those butterflies out for sure. Like, yeah.

Brad Crowell 22:55
For 15 years ago, when I was I had just moved to LA and I was in Trader Joe’s with my roommate at the time. And there’s this girl walking down the aisle, and I just started talking to her. And like you knew her? No, I don’t know what you’re talking about. Whatever the fuck, I was just talking. I was just being friendly Brad. Right. (inaudible) And we’re talking and like, we had this, like, we saw each other in a couple of rows. And it was kind of cute. And we got to the line.

Lesley Logan 23:48
And it’s like, every single person in LA like you try to meet someone at Trader Joe’s.

Brad Crowell 23:54
And we’re talking and we’re chit chatting in the line. And we’re waiting and you know, and then my roommate turns around, and he goes, Oh my god, are you so and so and she’s a fucking famous actress. And it just killed the entire conversation. And it was so bad. I was like, bro, bro, you fucked that up and what the hell?

Lesley Logan 24:11
Who was it, do you remember?

Brad Crowell 24:12
I have literally no idea. But you know, but it was like it totally changed the dynamic. And I was like, weren’t well.

Lesley Logan 24:23
Yeah, yeah. So it’s really funny. We put people on pedestals. They put it like it’s a whole thing. It’s yeah. And that creates weird impostor syndrome, which doesn’t have to exist because they’re just people who also need whatever you have to offer. So there you go.

Brad Crowell 24:36
Yeah. Well, the other thing I thought was really hilarious was he takes inspiration from Patrick Stewart, super famous stage actor and obviously, like Star Trek Stewart.

Lesley Logan 24:46
Oh, okay. I just out of myself. I’ve clearly not watched Star Trek.

Brad Crowell 24:49
No, come on. He’s like in that he’s so famous. Like know that Spock. But yes, I appreciate that.

Lesley Logan 24:56
But don’t everyone on Star Trek, do it.

Brad Crowell 24:58
No, only Spock.

Lesley Logan 24:59
Only Spock does this?

Brad Crowell 25:00
Well Spock and his people. For those of you listening, family, it’s the fingers. Well, just you know you have to do this and realize but your straps on your feet if you’re a classical teacher, yeah.

Brad Crowell 25:11
If you’re not watching on YouTube, she’s doing the split V thing.

Lesley Logan 25:15
Yeah, but I have to cheat. I have to pull my fingers down. Oh my god, you could do it on both hands.

Brad Crowell 25:20
Yeah. Come on, come on, you can do it. What is that hard? It’s easy. So yeah, anyway, Patrick Stewart said that even today after being like, like, literally, I think he’s Sir Patrick Stewart. And oh, he’s knighted. Oh, yeah. Come on. You fucking know who he is. Look at it look. Yes. Look up his picture. You know. Anyway, he, he has been on stage thousands of hours on stage right and in front of cameras. And that’s not Spock. Know. Okay. Now, I’ll get Patrick Stewart. Anyway, he said he still actually gets stage fright. After career, decades of doing it, he still gets stage fright. And he said, and he has this little mantra that he says to himself, he says, You know what, I don’t give enough. He probably says I don’t give a fuck. Right? And he says, what happens? What what I thought was really interesting was like, how is that beneficial? Because it kind of seems like flippin and silly and ridiculous, you know, but what I thought was cool was that Ryan said that you’re actually you’re, you’re kind of freeing yourself in that moment. You’re detaching from the outcome in the moment and you’re reducing the stakes. That’s a pretty cool analysis of I don’t give a fuck.

Brad Crowell 25:21
Yeah, mine is gonna say I did look up who Spock is, I don’t know the difference of the two and Sir Patrick Stewart’s hotter if it’s if it’s any, but he’s concerned.

Brad Crowell 26:47
We were all wondering, you know, if that’s what you were saying

Lesley Logan 26:51
To people, I would want to be with Sir Patrick Stewart. Yeah, I can’t do the eyebrows on Spock. Um, anyway.

Brad Crowell 27:01
Okay. All right. Well, stick around. We’ll be right back. All right. So finally, let’s talk about those Be It Action items what bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your convo with Ryan Lindner? Own who you are, there’s nothing you have to become or do or you don’t have to arrive at anything. You just have to allow it. You are you.

Lesley Logan 27:26
You are already you were born amazing. Already happened. I love it.

Brad Crowell 27:32
Yeah, so I think well, I think it’s also I think it’s just hard you know, we feel like we need to be more do more or you know, like with the qualify or again we were talking about this a couple of weeks ago about our performance-based society about how like you know the achievements that we are are how we define ourselves right and I think that of course it feels good to like hit a mark that we set for ourselves but again, we should celebrate that and too if we just jump from mark to mark to mark we’re not actually enjoying the in-betweens ever, right ,and I think that we can apply that same thing about you know, who are you who like who are we how how do we see ourselves. I think that

Lesley Logan 28:15
Made me think of Allison, who are you and he does it and then he does a little smoke, who are you? The ultimate question My goodness Yeah, it’s I

Brad Crowell 28:32
There’s nothing more that you have to become to be you. You’re already you.

Lesley Logan 28:37
You’re it. You made it.

Brad Crowell 28:38
You made it. Congrats you are.

Lesley Logan 28:39
You actually technically beened it till you sawed it but you’ve been I’m just trying to like you have arrived at that new you were born that way but now you maybe you said to be it till you see it but like you’ve you’re born that way and so maybe it’s the journey is just you finding yourself back to who you already were.

Lesley Logan 28:40
We’ve beened it till we sawed it.

Lesley Logan 28:47
You know what? Past tense on the past tense even like my double negatives I guess you don’t like my double past?

Brad Crowell 29:07
I don’t even know what to say. That’s amazing. What about you? What is your

Lesley Logan 29:11
Wow he said then this is the hard that he has that seems hard to just be who you are. So he actually said he would practice it and I really here’s the thing he says like practice in front of people, practice speaking and put yourself on camera and record it like this will help you accomplish, your competence comes about, you guys, competence says that you don’t wait for competence to bestow itself upon you competence comes from doing the fucking thing over and over again until you feel like you can do it like have you ever seen someone like they’re able to like like stir something that they’re cooking and also like tax on the phone with that looking at German or on old phones now I’m dating myself but all the people in this are RH t nine t nine where you could like I can text without looking at your Yeah, not here your phone and you could like oh texts,

Brad Crowell 29:57
I would text I would not only that my screen was is broken. So I had to memorize the I literally memorize the keypad?

Lesley Logan 30:07
Because Could you could you read people’s text to you? No, no. So but you would text them? I would text them. I can’t read you say so just calling.

Brad Crowell 30:16
And then I would also I had to force me to memorize people’s phone numbers again.

Lesley Logan 30:20
Yes. So So but the reality is all those things come from practice and competence comes from just doing the thing. Like that’s just what it is. It’s actually also from just like showing up and doing the thing you said you would do that’s also putting coins in the competence bucket. And so if you are struggling with like, just being yourself and being until you see it, you can’t just sit around and wait for it to like, like, you know, night itself upon you. You have to actually do the thing and practice it. So practice in front of mirror, practice it while you practice doing it while you make a bed practice while you do the dishes. Practice that while you’re listening to Gaia, try for the 17th time in this recording session to find a bed that’s comfortable for her. None of them are we’ve tried seven, none of them are comfortable. So but we’re gonna keep practicing until we find a bed for Gaia. We’re just gonna keep going. But that is how you do it. So I really enjoyed this. I think it’s important for us to revisit impostor syndrome because it just keeps showing itself up as ugly. Just like the thorn in your side. And it’s coming because you are not being yourself.

Brad Crowell 31:22
Yeah. And so let us know how you’ve been until you’ve sought it.

Lesley Logan 31:25
Thank you for bringing it back full circle. I’m Lesley Logan.

Brad Crowell 31:28
And I’m Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan 31:29
You’re amazing for listening to our episode. Sometimes the wheels come off to us. We got three dogs and life going on but we hope that this helps you be it till you see it and not be perfect because that’s boring. If you have takeaways want you to tag the Be It pod, tag Ryan and until next time, Be It Till You See It.

Brad Crowell 31:47
Bye for now.

Lesley Logan
That’s all I’ve got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate this show and leave a review. And, follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over on IG at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us help others to BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!

Lesley Logan
‘Be It Till You See It’ is a production of ‘Bloom Podcast Network’.

Brad Crowell
It’s written, filmed and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan
It is produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.

Brad Crowell
Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan
Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals and Ximena Velasquez for our transcriptions.

Brad Crowell
Also to Angelina Herico for adding all the content to our website. And finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

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