Balancing Tough Love and Tender Love for Success
Ep. 304 Janey Brown
“You do actually just have to force yourself through the fear.”
Janey Brown is a seasoned speaker, coach, and accomplished singer, who leverages her expertise to inspire and guide individuals towards personal growth and self-discovery. With a strong commitment to mental well-being, Janey’s work is a testament to her dedication to helping others navigate life’s challenges
Janey’s story is a testament to the power of embracing change and pursuing diverse passions. In this episode, Lesley explores Janey’s remarkable transition from the world of music to academia, uncovering the intricacies of managing multiple lanes that require restructuring and pushing through discomfort.
If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected].
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In this episode you will learn about:
- When to force yourself through fear and apply tough or tender love.
- Some grounding practices to connect with your intuition.
- Why do you need to be comfortable despite slow progress?
- How to restructure your mindset to cope with the challenges of multiple pursuits.
- The role of self-discipline when we lack motivation.
- Janey Brown’s Website – https://janeybrown.com/
- Janey Brown’s Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/janeybworld/
- Janey Brown’s Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/janeybworld/
- Mentions, Be It Pod guest speaker Kate Wind episode 157 – https://beitpod.com/bitysiep157
- Mentions, Jungian Psychology by Carl Gustav Jung – https://beitpod.com/junianpyschology
I’ve really battled with myself internally on feeling behind like that’s probably one of my biggest negative internal narratives is like I’m behind, I’m behind. I’m not doing enough. I’m not going fast enough. Like, constantly comparing. It can get really brutal.
Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I’m Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I’ve trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it’s the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It’s a practice, not a perfect. Let’s get started.
Lesley Logan 0:58
All right, loves, I got something cool for you today. So first of all, thank you for being here. Thank you for being a listener of the show. Thank you for hitting subscribe and line this download into your wherever you listen to podcasts. It means the world, you have no idea like you actually have no idea that when you listen to the end, that matter that when you download the podcast, it matters, that like when you share it with just one friend like it matters and podcast, any podcasts that you love. That is how they grow. It is definitely a community effort. And so I just wanna say thank you for being here. And helping me make this dream come true.
Lesley Logan 1:30
We have such incredible guests coming out with, next that I am just, you know, it’s so hard for me as someone who I’ve really I love instant gratification. And I also can’t keep a secret. I mean, I can keep secrets, but like, when it’s like not gonna hurt anyone. And it’s my own secret to tell like, I can’t keep it. And so it’s sometimes it’s so hard for me to not like share with you guys like all the amazing things that are coming out. But I can’t wait for you to experience them and have their words in your ears. And today is one of those guests. When I came across Janey Brown, I really enjoyed how she talked about her journey, mental health and like, She’s so honest and authentic around the journey that it takes to go back to school, and to put yourself in a space that’s uncomfortable. And so we had a lovely conversation about what it was like to go on this journey to start something new. And also, like, get really clear on like, what is grounding? Like? What, how fast should we be going? Like, what is the pace? How do you how, like, how do you get it all done? And so really honest conversation that you’re gonna have. You’re gonna hear today and feel free to talk along with us. And then let us know what resonates with you enjoy this lovely conversation with Janey Brown.
Lesley Logan 2:44
Hey, Be It babe. All right, get ready for a really fun conversation. I think it’s going to be anyways, we haven’t had it yet. But I’m predicting that to go that way. I really love our guest. When I came across her and what she’s working on and the journey she’s had. I was like, Oh my gosh, like this is a Be It story. Like in the making, we have to share it. So Janey Brown, will you tell everyone who you are and what you’re up to these days?
Janey Brown 3:05
Yeah, good to be here. Thanks for having me. I am a singer, performer, coach, and I’m actually student of psychology. So that’s like the titles, who I am underneath all that is just a human trying to do the best they can.
Lesley Logan 3:21
Yeah, I love it. You guys can’t, unless you’re watching on the YouTube channel, her microphone says be brave. And I just like really love that it’s like reminding me throughout this whole conversation.
Janey Brown 3:31
Reminds me, too.
Lesley Logan 3:34
I’m like, I’m like, Oh, this for me. Thank you so much Janey Brown. And you’re like it’s actually for me, but thank you.
Janey Brown 3:39
For everyone, everyone, totally.
Lesley Logan 3:42
So Janey, you know, singer like that’s, being a performer, my husband is a musician and like, that’s a whole journey and being until you see it. And then for you to then become a student of psychology, I would just want to know, like, what, what took you from one route to the next? Like, how did that kind of come to be?
Janey Brown 3:59
Yeah, it was a wild ride. Definitely. You’re right about that in terms of the musician path. So I mean, very, very sort of, concisely. I’ve been a performer all my life. And that was sort of first and foremost my direction and path and passion. And then sort of in the you know, halfway through my performance career, let’s say, I got into wellness. And, you know, that’s been a whole other completely parallel career to my performance career. And then it just sort of got to a point where I realized that the only way for me to level up from where I was with two careers. Sort of ever evolving, obviously, but just sort of these two careers that were, you know, in sort of forward motion was to go to academia, that was something I’ve never done. And that’s something I really didn’t think I was capable of. And yeah, jumping into that has just been just so insanely beneficial. So yeah, that’s kind of
Lesley Logan 4:59
I think it’s like, I think it’s interesting. Like, I feel like anyone listening would be like, Oh my god, I’d love to be back in school any day of the week. And I would think it’d be like, so much harder to be like, I’m gonna go sing and perform. And I’m gonna be in the wellness industry like, those are like, those are like the things that scare them the most.
Janey Brown 5:15
That’s really a funny way to look at it. I’ve never thought about it like that. But yeah, I mean, for sure, like academia was so not my comfort zone, it was terrifying to approach that again, and like get back into it. It was so yeah, it definitely is reverse if people are afraid to get on stage like, academia was my like, stage fright or whatever.
Lesley Logan 5:32
Yeah. So what did you do to like, kind of get comfortable? Or are you still in that process?
Janey Brown 5:38
Well, honestly, I just forced myself like it. It’s definitely easier. Now. It’s not easy. But it’s easier now than my first year. My first year was brutal. Like I just, I barely even wanted to do it. I just knew that I had to. And now like, I know, the ropes, and I’m sort of thinking like, Okay, this has been fun. I wonder what a Masters is, like, you know, because I know that that will be even more, you know, challenging and next level than then sort of, you know, the, the regular sort of degree or whatever. But it really has just been a matter of force yourself. I believe in tender love and self-compassion. But there is circumstances where tough love is needed. And you do actually just have to force yourself through the fear.
Lesley Logan 6:22
Yeah. Yeah. I agree. I mean, like, I think also, like, the things that we were doing, we’re drawn to do, we’re drawn to do them, because there’s something challenging about them, there is a little bit of uncertainty, like, Oh, what is this going to be? And also, like, you know, otherwise, you’d be bored. You know, it just gets so boring. So when you like, so obviously, there’s the forcing yourself to just get comfortable with it. But like, I actually wonder what when you just mentioned like that tender love like that care like that self-care? What does that practice look like for you? Because I do think that that’s actually, if that comes easier for you than like, the tough love of going to academia, I feel like some people can, can learn a lot about how you do that, how you have that practice in your life?
Janey Brown 7:03
That’s such a, that’s such a great question, I would actually argue that tough love is way more natural for me than tender love. It’s, it’s hard to put into words, because I think that everyone has their own version of like, what self-care looks like, and what recovery looks like, kind of the same thing with what self-love looks like. When when it’s tough love, it’s sort of like ripping the band aid off. And when it’s tender love, like, I use this metaphor, where it’s like, if you were to get injured, the first initial kind of time of being injured and the wound is open, let’s say you really can’t, you know, tread on and force yourself to sort of like perform at the same level you’re performing at because you’re just going to keep bleeding. And you’re going to, you know, you’re going to lose consciousness, and you’re actually just going to hurt yourself or make it even worse. So you have to kind of think about it, like it’s this sort of fresh wound, and what would you do with a fresh wound, you would like, clean it and you’d sit there kind of in solitude and or with support, and you’d kind of process it and you’d bandage it up. And you’d, you’d kind of be gentle with it, and you’d stay away from you know, using it and then eventually the wound is going to heal. And if you keep the bandaid on for too long, the skin is going to atrophy and rot and like you have to rip it off. So I think knowing when to be tender and when to be tough is a personal thing, but they are both needed in terms of you know, what, what makes you sort of the best version of yourself. And the methods that you use to be tender or tough are also I think, really personal. (Inaudible) someone’s goals are.
Lesley Logan 8:44
Yeah, that’s such a, I love that description that was like, really, I think anyone can take that away and then figure how to put their own their own spin on what Tinder love looks like them. And I also do think it is true. Like, you know, I always call myself a recovering perfectionist and overachiever. But like when you’re a perfectionist, you’re like, okay, but like what, like, what, how many minutes of tender love versus like, how many minutes of the tough love, like, how long are we going to be here? And I think it’s like, you know, unfortunately, you’ll have to explore a
Janey Brown 9:11
little bit. Yeah, yeah. Right. Like, you have to be in touch with your intuition and your heart and your soul and sort of all of the mushy gushy stuff and the stuff that’s not tangible. In order to know like, when to pivot and when to Yeah, when to when to rest and when to give it your all. And sometimes resting is giving it your all.
Lesley Logan 9:33
Yes, okay, like, everyone hit rewind, sometimes rest is giving it your all. I agree, because it’s like, sometimes it’s the thing that we need the most. Yeah, you know, I find that, you know, a lot of people have a hard time going with their gut with their intuition because there’s like, it’s hard to understand, like, there’s the voice. It’s like imposter syndrome. Fear, like, like trying to keep you safe. And then there’s that gut voice. It’s like, No, you should actually go that way that actually Is it a good idea? How did you get like, was that something natural to you? What? Or have you been able to like articulate in ways that people can maybe try to understand when they’re like actually paying attention to their gut? They’re listening to their intuition.
Janey Brown 10:13
Such a great question. I think the instinct that I mean, yes, it was natural for sure. For me, walking the path of an artist and an entrepreneur, which I’ve done, you know, all my life has always been super reliant on, like, what does it feel like, though, and I think a good place that people can start if they’re looking to get more in touch with that, like we say things like our gut, and we say things like our heart. But what I really actually think specifically it is, is our nervous system, like what does our nervous system make our body feel like and that’s a practice to get in touch with your body to be grounded in your body, and to know kind of what the differences between let’s say, fear that’s merited because you are sensing danger and just fear of something that could happen, and it’s actually not imminent. And it really is this thing that you need to take a risk on, you know, there is a line there. And it takes practice to get to know that and in our society, we really value like intellectualizing things, and, you know, sort of overriding ourselves, and that can kind of take us further away from that, quote, unquote, gut instinct, or following your heart. But I think a good place to start is like, How can I personally get in touch with my body so that I can understand like, neurologically, you know, what my body is telling me and the wisdom of that, and that could be as simple as like, starting to go to yoga and doing, you know, a practice that’s more introspective, rather than like power yoga, where you’re just kind of like, kicking your own ass or whatever, right, back to the back to the old routine, you know?
Lesley Logan 11:48
Right. Right. I love that you brought up yoga as a great grounding practice, like what are some other grounding practices that you have found?
Janey Brown 11:56
I mean, right now, in general, there’s sort of this wave and movement of somatic base practices like somatic coaches, and therapists and things like that, that I would definitely recommend people kind of looking into. But for me, it’s funny, because any movement-based practice really can be introspective, as long as you’re intentional. So like, a run can be meditative. You know, crushing it on the stairs, or leg day or whatever, yoga, all of those things can be deeply, you know, somatic experience and introspective, if you actually apply, you know, your mindfulness to it.
Lesley Logan 12:35
Yeah, that’s such a great point. I’ve been hobby hunting, and at the time, we’re recording this. Today, I’m gonna go rock climbing for the second time. And like, it’s not an actual real rock guy. So it’s not actually the ground. But like, also, like you’re getting as far away from the ground, but there’s something because you can only focus on like, where’s my hand going, can I reach that is my foot gonna stay on this like little knob thing that I don’t really feel safe on, like, you know, like, you have to, you can only go inward, you know, and so it doesn’t actually I can be things that are off the ground and not laying down and you could still ground it.
Janey Brown 13:10
Oh my gosh, I so agree with that. Bouldering is is such a fun activity. And if you like climbing and you like being in the air, and another thing that you might like, which is this is kind of my version of bouldering is aerial silks, it’s, it’s dubbed as, as dancing in the air. It’s not aerial yoga, where there’s this like, contraption, it’s two ribbons that hang from the ceiling, and then you climb up them. And you put yourself in different wraps and do different drops and different movements and poses and stuff. And it’s, it’s very physically challenging, but it’s so like, it’s like physically, as equally physically challenging as it is sort of this experience of freedom and, and just sort of expression. And I don’t know, like, if that’s speaking to you, but it is, it is something I equate with bouldering just because it’s the back muscles and you’re climbing and you’re in the air and like yeah, tension like,
Lesley Logan 14:01
Yeah, yeah, you can’t be distracted those things. I think that those are important little practices to have like something where you can actually like, get lost in the the practice versus like your, you know, you can run and not be intentional and think about your day, you can also do all those things. Some of these things, you’ll actually hurt yourself if you are not, but I think that that’s, I think too often be like, Oh, I have to have like this yoga practice and I don’t like yoga or they don’t have access to yoga or just doesn’t like light their fire. It’s like actually it can be anything and you brought it intention. Intent is like the key there. What so okay, like academia drew you in? Why psychology? What was like the thing that was like, I’m gonna go towards this as I could barely pick a major. So I’m just like, always intrigued, that someone can actually make that decision.
Janey Brown 14:49
Well, I mean, it you know, I’m assuming that you did yours much younger. And if that’s the case, no wonder you couldn’t pick a major like we’re all just trying to figure it. I mean, we’re trying to figure it out forever. are, but it’s, you know, you might have a bit more clarity when you are an adult. So I definitely have compassion for that. For me, Psych just seems like the natural thing because I was already, as an extracurricular sort of, you know, poll, I was already studying things like trauma, like doing trauma certifications, I was already studying psychology because I was in therapy. So I was getting to know my own psychology, and, you know, managing my own mental health challenges. And it just, it just made sense for me to kind of, and also, to be honest, I didn’t know what else I would do. It’s like, I could do like performance arts, but I don’t think I need a degree in that. You know what I mean? Like, let me let me go outside the box here. So yeah, it just seems it just seemed to make sense based on, you know, my own like life path.
Lesley Logan 15:49
Yeah, yeah. We had a guest on here recently, she’s actually an astrologer, and a Feng Shei person, but she has a degree in psychology. So when you cool work with her, shout out to Kate (inaudible) when you work with her, and she’s like reading your chart or reading the cards, like it’s actually with a degree of psychology behind it. So it’s like, it’s almost like going out there. It’s like going to therapy, but with like, some sort of, like, here’s why the stars are like this, and this way (inaudible).
Janey Brown 16:16
That’s really cool. I love that. I love that. And I love that she’s doing that. Because there is like, you know, a very strong rebuttal against like Pseudoscience in the world of, you know, it’s psychology is a science. So it’s, it’s, but it’s but you know, to me, it’s only a pseudoscience until it’s not like, one once upon a time, we didn’t really believe in mindfulness. And then it was studied extensively. And here we are, you know, it’s completely signed to a
Lesley Logan 16:40
You can get a degree in it at UCLA.
Janey Brown 16:42
Yeah, exactly. So like, so I love that, you know, she has this scientific grounding and merit, but she’s also like, Yeah, but I’m going to explore this other thing that also seems to be, you know, intriguing. And there’s something there, because we all keep returning to it.
Lesley Logan 16:56
So Okay. When people hear stories like yours, one of the things they’ve probably always come back to is like, Okay, I’m inspired. But like, the time like, this is a whole shift in Persona, it’s a shift in your schedule. What was that like to go from like, you know, wellness and music to like, adding in, like an actual degree, like, that’s not, you know, that’s for students that’s a full-time job. So like, right, like, how did you create space in your life to, to do that?
Janey Brown 17:27
I mean, definitely, I had to put a few things on, I don’t want to say the back burner, but just like a little bit more in the background, like, you know, I’m still performing, I performed every single year of my life for 26 years, and that I don’t intend to stop. But you know, I’m not as you know, for sure, I wasn’t as able to focus on gigs as consistently. And right now, you know, I’m finishing up my degree, I’m due to graduate this year. And I’ve had to kind of just scale back on pushing forward with different speaking gigs. And you know, all the things that I’m doing coaching, even building my business, it’s just slower. It’s sort of like, if you’re watering, if you’re like a farmer, and you have all these different rows of vegetables, and you’re, you know, if you’re focused on one thing, you can water that lane, like super quickly, but for me, it’s sort of like, okay, I can take the first kind of five rows, and like water, water, water, water, and then like, move to the next. I’m talking about rows. And it’s confusing, but you know what I’m saying it’s like, I’m kind of watering each plant, let’s say in the five rows one at a time. And so I’m moving forward, much, much slower, because I’m taking on kind of all these things at once. So that’s kind of the only difference. It’s like, you can make the time for as much as you as many activities as you want. You’ll just move slower in each of the lanes than you would if you were just focused on one and I don’t think one is worse than the other. I would, you know, love to just focus on one, but here we are.
Lesley Logan 18:57
Yeah, I think like, I love that. I could picture it with you. Um, mostly because like, I grew up in a farm area.
Janey Brown 19:06
But I’m glad I did it justice.
Lesley Logan 19:08
Yeah, yeah. But, um, but I think it’s also like, there’s a difference between one or the other is that, if you are comfortable with it, like is actually just like being comfortable, like, I am going to go slower because I am watering five different crops at a time as opposed to like focusing on one crop like, so it’s kind of like it’s, I think you’re I think it’s absolutely right. And I think too often people are like, they see the grass is greener on the other side. But really, it’s like, no, the person with that grass just has come with the I’m only going to have one crop, and I’m gonna go real fast. Whereas you eventually want five crops, but you’re gonna it’s going to feel like you’re behind until, you know, you catch up at some point.
Janey Brown 19:50
You just summarize that perfectly and like it was not comfortable for me to do that at all. Like I I’ve really battled with myself internally on feeling behind like, that’s probably one of my biggest negative internal narratives is like I’m behind them behind I’m not doing enough, I’m not going fast enough like, yeah, and you summarize the feeling of that and the image of that perfectly it’s it’s like, constantly comparing and in each lane to like in academia like so far behind because I’m you know, I still have like my business and singing so like, in each of the like genres of activity, it’s been comparing to other people who are much (inaudible) so it’s, it can get really brutal if you if you aren’t on top of like your own mindset around that you have to really like restructure it, but it’s been super challenging.
Lesley Logan 20:38
Yeah, I mean, like, I’ve, like, I haven’t been in a classroom in a while. But I will say like, I mean, I tried Brad and I tried to take Spanish class a couple of times. And to be honest, we were doing the homework on the car on the way there, so we were not studying. So like. So since I actually was an intentional student, like actually applying things. You know, I, I’ll say like, I was in a group mastermind with, like, 40 people, and I remember like, someone going up, and she had been in the fitness industry for much longer than me. And she like, had scaled it to seven figures her business, and I’m like, Oh, my God, like, I’m so behind. And yet, when it came down to my speaking about what I’ve been doing, and then we had a big accountability partner, she’s like, I want you to be my accountability partner. And I was like, you want to be like yours? You’re like, you’re where I want to be. You know, so it’s so funny. The stories we tell ourselves about her being behind, because like, even the person ahead of you might actually looking back, like looking back and air quotes, and going, “Oh, my God, look where they are. Look what they’ve done. I want to do that.”
Janey Brown 21:44
Yeah, oh, it’s so true. It’s so true. Like, we have no idea what’s going on behind the scenes and what people are struggling with. And yeah, I’ve had countless people saying, say to me, like, I would love to go back to school. Like, you’re so lucky. You know what I mean? Like this. And, you know, for a minute, I did not feel lucky. I felt like I had to do it, you know, which is ridiculous. But that was my own limitation at that time. But like, yeah, for sure. I mean, the grass really is always greener. For sure.
Lesley Logan 22:11
Yeah, I am. I used to think about that, like many, many, many years ago. And I, I’m not saying that. I’ll never go back to school, but I’ll be really honest. I just don’t see myself taking on one major any like, I’m just, I don’t think I could do it. So I’m in admiration. And also I do see like, having a background in psychology helps with, with people, so many jobs. Like even if you want to be a chef, want to own a restaurant, having the understanding the way people’s minds think matters in building a restaurant and building a menu and also like it really, I mean, like, you couldn’t have picked a better degree if you’re gonna go back and do that intentionally. But it is so funny how we we tell ourselves these whoppers and we get a little stuck on like, Oh, they’re further ahead, or oh my god, it’s so nice for them, or Oh, I wish I and right, we don’t actually think about like, well, what if I did it? How could I do it? And would it be possible? And like going back to what you said, it’s like, well, it’s possible you just have you’ll just go slower, you’ll just instead of taking going to school full time.
Janey Brown 23:14
Absolutely. Absolutely. And that it’s humbling, like yes, your your ego is going to take a hit for sure. Especially if you’re a high achiever, and you’re, you know, you have all these goals, and it’s, it’s like, your ego is going to take a hit. But that’s good for you too, right? Like, in the same way that like, you know, your muscles are gonna be sore after you do leg day. Like that’s, you know, that’s a good sign. It’s not to say that you can’t walk the next day. I’m not suggesting like, Go out of your capacity. But yeah, like, I think that, you know, deciding to do something at the expense of the optics that you’ve so delicately created for yourself is actually a good thing. And we don’t see it like that. And I don’t see it, like, I barely see it like that, too, right? It’s like in this conversation, I’m able to say that but like, in practicality, it’s such a resistance around, you know, doing something that I think is getting in the way of like, my, like best life and optimal dream. And all the things.
Lesley Logan 24:15
So what are you excited about right now? Like, what are you being until you see as we speak?
Janey Brown 24:20
I am excited about real. I mean, I’m definitely excited about graduating. I’m also excited about I have a song that I’m releasing in, I think in May a new song and a book that I’ll be releasing later this year.
Lesley Logan 24:35
Oh my goodness.
Janey Brown 24:37
I worked really hard on.
Lesley Logan 24:38
Yeah. Oh my god, like, okay, a song and a book and graduating. So tell us about your book. Is that going to be published? People can go get it. What what is it about?
Janey Brown 24:47
Yeah, for sure. It’s I’m gonna self-publish this one. It’s sort of I would describe it as like a pocket self-help book. It’s, you know, it’s going to be maybe 150 to 200 pages. We’re still in edits right now. So things can change and more material can be added or taken away still. But it’s the material is basically the process of transformation with you and your dark side. So we all have a shadow self. And the shadow self is this aspect that we’ve, it’s these aspects of ourselves that we’ve deemed unacceptable to ourselves and to society. So the things we’re ashamed of the things that are too painful, or that we’re too afraid of, to look out, we kind of shove those into the shadows, like literally. And the problem is that they need to be, they actually need to be integrated. This is Yang Yin psychology, it’s not my idea, you know, he, he understood that we needed to integrate these sort of shadow aspects that live in our unconsciousness, or else they will sort of come out sideways and hold us back prevent us from taking risks, you know, stopping us from being optimal, whether it be physical, mental, or emotional, or financial, or career-wise, right?
Janey Brown 26:02
So, I, I had stage fright for many, many years, and on the process in the process, which is crazy, because I performed so often, but in the process of me, you know, managing that and learning to overcome that, I really, really was connected with my shadow side and my dark side, and I saw how integral that was to, to become whole and to actually shine brighter. So the the book itself is essentially like a process, it takes you on a process, it’s, there’s a bit of psychoeducation in there, and there’s a bit of storytelling in there. But it’s mostly process, the process of how you can face your how one way, let’s say to face your shadow side, and there’s like six modules or six chapters that sort of go through that stuff. You know, so that you can live your most fulfilling life and so they are not held back by these, these unconscious. You know, negs that are, unbeknownst to you holding you back in life or, or even renounced you holding you back in life. Like, here’s how you can face that in yourself. Yeah. So that’s kind of the gist of it. It’s called Fear to Fierce and the tagline is, essentially, you know, Embracing Your Dark Side So That You can Unlock Your Mental Warrior.
Lesley Logan 27:18
That’s so cool. That’s so cool. Oh my gosh, I’m so excited. You’re about to come out, we’ll make sure that we put in the shownotes the links to it and everything when this comes out. Okay. Wow, you’re just like, just taking on the world. And I love it and doing your best.
Janey Brown 27:31
Just like you.
Lesley Logan 27:32
True. That’s amazing. Okay, everyone, we’ll take a brief break. And I’m going to find out your Be It Action Items and where people can find you, probably, get your book when it’s ready.
Lesley Logan 27:43
All right, Janey, so where do you like to hang out? If you have the time to be on social? Where is that? And where can people get your book when it’s ready?
Janey Brown 27:50
Yeah, so janeybrown.com is my website. J-A-N-E-Y Brown, like the color and all my social accounts are, you know, at the bottom, or whatever at the bottom, and you can kind of branch out from there. YouTube channel. Most of my social channels are just Jane B world. And I think YouTube is Janey Brown. So pretty easy to remember. That’s the social stuff, the book. I mean, the book should be, even though I’m self-publishing it, it should be available on stores like Amazon, I am going to do an audio version as well. So that will be on Audible. But yeah, the publishing the publishing company I haven’t or the self-publishing company, I haven’t decided yet. But it will disseminate the material across all online stores that you can then purchase the physical copy. Yeah, so that’s we’re looking at kind of early fall, but I know it could change. But yeah, that will be what happens.
Lesley Logan 28:46
Congratulations, we’ve self published as well. And so in the in the book world now it’s like, you can go either way, depending on like, what you want to do, and like what it’s for, and like how fast you want to get out there. And like oftentimes, like having a publisher, it’s like having an investor in your business. They’re gonna tell you what they want to see in that book.
Janey Brown 29:03
Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. I’ve heard that as well. And I’m not opposed to future but this just didn’t it didn’t make sense to do it like that. For this. It’s just a little treat that I’m offering.
Lesley Logan 29:13
I love it. I love it. Okay, for like, you know, bold, executable, intrinsic targets steps people can take to be till you see it, what do you have for us?
Janey Brown 29:20
Okay, so my, this is, you know, on the concept of building habits, right? I’m such a strong believer in healthy habits, your habits make up your life in the same way that your cells make up your body. My catchphrase or let’s say like a quote that I always say to myself, and my clients is where motivation lacks discipline must live. We’re not always going to be intrinsically motivated and magically inspired to do the things we have to do and when that’s not there, which often isn’t. We just have to sort of push through the muck and that’s where discipline comes in. It’s the discipline aspect of these healthy habits is this decision to like, go when you don’t feel like it. And obviously use discernment. Like if you’re injured, don’t push through that, like, that’s where we get back to the tender love stuff. But, you know, there’s a lot to be said about, you know, the tough love aspect and having to sort of force yourself through the discomfort, not out of your capacity so that you’re traumatizing yourself, but force yourself through the discomfort in order to create this discipline so that eventually it just kind of becomes a need, it’s this thing you don’t even think about. It’s like yeah, yeah, of course, I’m going to the gym. Even though it’s pouring rain in a blizzard and horizontal ice shards in Canada or whatever. Like.
Lesley Logan 30:40
No, I love this. I mean, I get up walk the dog every morning. And trust me, like I got rid of a clock that has there’s no snooze button on my clock. Like I just have to get up. And I go on the walk. And like sometimes I’m so excited to go on the walk because the sky is beautiful. And other days. I’m like, Oh, is it really raining? Do we think we should go out in that? And it’s like No, get out there. It’s not actually raining and take an umbrella in case it starts like yeah, this sort of line is needed when the motivation is not there. I love that.
Janey Brown 31:11
Yeah, it’s huge. And I love that I love that you gave that example because it really like the weather really is a huge excuse that we all tend and honestly like the more you put yourself like sometimes I deliberately it was like negative 20 Celsius a little while ago in Canada and I was like I’m specifically going to make sure I stay out for an hour for 60 minutes at least going for a walk so that nothing else is going to seem as bad and there’s less excuses then to follow this year right I mean yeah still excuses here and there but it’s like if I can go out in that I can you know it same thing I go people with cold plunge, they’re doing cold plunges have a similar mentality. It’s like if you can do that, like you can go out in the rain in California or like in the summer or whatever, you know?
Lesley Logan 31:54
Yeah. Yeah, I I started my cold showers after I talked to these brain doctors, and I clearly was like, like, my cognition was like, not great, like on it’s on a recording y’all. And I was like, wow, I am. I mean, I knew that it wasn’t great, because I wasn’t sleeping very well. But now it’s like, terrible. And I was I said, I’m gonna like we talked about cold showers and I was like, Oh, I can do that. I think I’m just gonna start to do that. And having this one that’s like a daily there’s it never gets easier. That cold shower is not easier. I don’t care. I’ve been doing it for a month now. And you all it’s like, as soon as it starts hitting my back, I’m like, oh my god, I bet I have a headache attack. But it makes everything else seem easier. And I’m in a much better mood when it’s over. So that’s ‘lit.
Lesley Logan 31:54
That’s amazing. That’s an amazing habit. I’ll tell you like, I’ve certainly done cold plunges. But I haven’t I have not gotten into the daily cold shower yet.
Lesley Logan 32:20
A cold plunge is way easier. I’m gonna tell you.
Janey Brown 32:39
Oh like, I bet.
Lesley Logan 32:51
I didn’t think so I was like, oh my god, submerge yourself. No, I would, I would more easily jump into a cold plunge. Then you stand in the shower. You have to like force yourself. Like you have to force yourself to keep making the decision. It is not fun. But the discipline around like, well, actually, it’s like, the motivation isn’t there to get in a shower. But I know what’s on the other side of it. And sometimes it’s like doing that tough love stuff. Because on the other side is like exactly how you want to feel that day exactly the strength you want to have. And so what a great way to sum up like, I think so many people have a hard time with habits and like it’s so true, like discipline is the thing you need when motivation lacks and the reality is it’s like BJ Fogg put it best like in his book Tiny Habits he’s like motivation is that like friend who’s like super awesome to go to a party with but you would never ask them to pick you up at the airport. Like they’re just not reliable.
Janey Brown 33:43
Amazing. Oh, that’s an amazing way to summarize that. I love that.
Lesley Logan 33:47
Yeah. That’s great. Janey, you’re amazing. You’re great. You’re doing amazing things. If this is your first book of many things you’re gonna put out to the world to like, you know, keep changing all of us for the better. Thank you so much for being here. How are you all going to use these tips in your life? Tag Janey Brown, tag the Be It pod. Share this with a friend. Grab her book. And until next time, Be It Till You See It.
That’s all I’ve got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate this show and leave a review. And, follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over on IG at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us help others to BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!
‘Be It Till You See It’ is a production of the ‘Bloom Podcast Network’.
It’s written, filmed and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell.
It is produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.
Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.
Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals and Ximena Velasquez for our transcriptions.
Also to Angelina Herico for adding all the content to our website. And finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.
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